So tell me… have you ever had a life-altering moment?
Something that is big enough to completely transform, not only the path of your life, but your entire outlook on the world too?
I did recently. And I’m still slightly reeling.
It was a regular Friday afternoon, I’m playing with the kids, feeling more than the usual exhaustion that a working mum of two feels by the end of the day. Taking myself to bed with a couple of Panadol, hoping it will ease by morning, I’m quickly staggered by how truly awful I feel.
On it goes until Sunday afternoon, when eventually I buckle and head into emergency.
Wheeled straight through emergency and into intensive care, I know things aren’t good, and diagnosed with severe pneumonia and acute sepsis of the blood… the saga begins.
With every spare vein connected to some form of IV, the machines bleeped, the doctors scurried around and the husband paced the halls, whilst I lay there wondering exactly what on earth had happened to my world.
Four long nights passed and eventually, amidst the haze and the chatter, I heard the words stable and I breathed a very sore sigh of relief.
But the enormity of what had happened didn’t hit me until I was settled in the ward, where I found out exactly how touch-and-go my situation had been, and how much damage it had truly wreaked on my body. One different result, one altered medication and… well… I might not be writing this now.
And so as I sit here, over a month after the event – still sore, still exhausted – and still with a myriad of tests ahead of me, I also have a light bulb illuminating my every thought. Because this experience has made me realise how truly precious life is. Not in a passing ‘wow, I’ve just been in hospital’ phase, but a real, absolute and overwhelming passion for life… for my life.
And with that passion comes the drive and inspiration to make the leap and do what I love for a living. To make sure I kiss and hug my children every day… no matter how frustrating they can be! Because I might not be there tomorrow to do it.
I’ll never know where it came from, how it invaded our world with such ferocity, and whether I’ll ever be struck down again. But for the moment, I’m inspired to be alive.
Photo credit: dirkercken / 123RF Stock Photo