Listening to Ariana sing her recent song Thank U, Next (I’m so f—–‘ grateful for my ex) made me think about what I could possibly be thankful for in relation to my Mr Ex.
For those of you who don’t know about my journey: Mr Ex, cruelly pulled the rug from out under my feet — my foundation — after 17 years together. So, after a little soul searching and digging deep trying look past the devastation he left behind, I was able to list a few!
Yes, this would have been impossible to do approximately six years ago!
As I write this article, I ponder over the fact that this is still actual therapy even thinking about this and typing, just as boxing was when I first took it on post-separation!
I must say that even though I am thankful to my ex, I still seem to struggle about the human capability of one human to drop and replace a partner they have shared their life with after 17 years for someone else so quickly!
I find myself still working through this particular part, so I may need to write about “THAT” topic when I am wiser!
Here are 5 things I thank you for my Mr Ex
1. My babies
The most amazing gift he gave me. I would have gone through all I did a million times over to have had my babies. From the word go they were the most perfect humans (OK, a little biased!).
2. The ‘firsts’ of a lot of things
Mr Ex introduced me to a lot of new things! Things like rides on catamarans, weekends away, being treated like a lady (I was 19 and had no idea!), firsts tastes for the finer things in life (as he was from a “comfortable” family). I had my first glass of champagne with his family.
3. My first engagement ring
It was small but it was expensive, and he made sure he got the one I liked.
4. His family
They were some of the most decent humans I have ever met even to this day. He was lucky to have called them his parents and I was lucky to be a part of it. OK, so his family felt they had to choose sides and therefore I was slowly ‘let go’.
During my time with them they taught me how to be a good parent, and also how to eat dinner as a family and so much more! Thank you, for always coming to our home on a Tuesday at 7am to take care of my young kids all day so I could go to work.
The spiral into separation was cruel, however the result has been more than anything I could have dreamed about! Separation gave me a rebirth, and a life that made my previous life look like a long hibernation. I feel MORE in everything. Whilst the separation had huge impacts, most of it was a little beyond my control. My situation evolved from my Mr Ex making choices that suited him only, and therefore I was the recipient. So, thank you to my Ex!
Despite the five things above being positive, the journey to say ‘thank you’ to my ex has been a very tough one at times (especially at the beginning). It has taken me quite a few years of self-discovery and time to heal for me to appreciate the positives. My hope for others is that this discovery is bestowed upon you sooner rather than later. Being in a positive state of mind is far better for your vibe and then the rest just flows!
“Your vibe attracts your tribe” – unknown (one of my most favourite quotes)