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  1. #1
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    Default 8 year old regressing

    Not sure what to do with my 8 year old? She is regressing in her behaviour and it’s doing my head in. She either talks to me like a baby or a sassy teenager, won’t go to the toilet by herself, get dressed, dry herself off after a shower, brush her teeth lies all the time. She throws herself around at bed time making noises but won’t talk or use her word to explain what’s going on and won’t take instruction when I tell her not to do something. Twice in the past two days I’ve told her repeatedly stop doing what you are doing and she didn’t and then hurt herself. Taking things away doesn’t seem to work, talking to her doesn’t work. Has anyone’s kid done this? This is new to me but it’s like having a big toddler and I’m really not enjoying being around her at the moment.

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  3. #3
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    My daughter has just turned 7 and has been difficult like that for 6 mths. I’ve put it down to jealousy over her 2.5 yo brother for attention. I find she responds very well to one on one exclusive time for at least 30 mins in a row .

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    Have there been any major changes in her life? How are things at school?

    Had/have a similar thing happening with DD1, who'll be eight in a couple of months. It started a few months after DD2 was born. I think jealousy is a major factor. Her best friend also left during the same period, and she's still finding her feet socially at school, so lots of big emotions which come out at home.

    Things are improving currently, I've been actively working on it for a few months though.

    It might also be a thing at this age?? A few of the other school mums I know have said the same thing over the past year.

  5. #5
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    It's called 'regression in service of the ego' in psychology - it's quite common and not a disorder, more a temporary state experienced as a side effect of stress. It's more common in children because they are less able to understand, recognise and deal with stress.

    If you ask her 'what's wrong' and she says 'nothing' or 'I don't know', that's probably the case - it's difficult for a child to recognise what the issue is. It could be the change in routine due to the pandemic, an incident at school, not getting enough sleep, a poor diet, jealousy, an illness (from post viral to post surgical) an issue with her friendship group or anything else that has had an emotional, psychological or physical impact.

    There are some pretty good advice articles online on how to respond/manage the issue as a parent and in most cases, it does go away.

  6. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Elevatormusic For This Useful Post:

    Kalina (20-04-2021),Kazza78 (20-04-2021),Mod-Uniquey (20-04-2021)


 

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