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  1. #1
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    Default Do you have trouble saying no?

    As the title says, do you have trouble telling people no.

    I have realised I struggle with certain individuals in my life and can’t be direct and say no, and give excuses instead to avoid saying no.

    Interested if anyone else is in the same boat here & has any tips on how you overcame this?

  2. #2
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    I am in the same boat. I don't have any advice, but a lot of sympathy.

  3. #3
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    I've gotten better at saying no the more children I add to my family lol.

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    Yep. I struggle. I try and skirt around subtlety and it always backfires.perfect example, I had a BUSY week with sick kids the other week.my mum had both kids one day, df and dad were both working, so it was ONLY ds3 and I.

    A friend called asking what plans I had that day. (Honestly, I was looking forward to ds3s sleep and just having some quiet time to myself where I could nap, shower in peace, enjoy lunch etc.... and just unwind. I KNEW if I didn't have any clear plans to be doing something she would drop around) so my answer was "not too much.im hanging for ds3 to sleep really soon so I can unwind and just enjoy some peace after our busy week. It's just us 2 so I'm looking forward to some me time, if the dog doesn't wake him up barking" because I don't like lying. I was brutally honest.

    this is the type of person who verges on stalker behaviour. She messages me via sms, if I don't respond quickly, messages over Facebook so she can see if I've read it or not. She then follows up with a call to my mobile, then home phone, AND if I don't answer those has even called df or mum in times I've actively avoided her. Sometimes the messages come while she's sitting out front of the house. She's harmless but oh. So. Exhausting!!

    Anyway, she replied to that message "oh great, I'll be about an hour away"...

    Great, so ds will be just going off to sleep, or will be asleep and the dogs barking because she's here would wake him. She's loud and full on,so little chance of him settling while she's here. So much for my shower or down time 😑 couldn't say no. The dog did bark and wake ds3 up when she arrived, and he was RAAAAATTTYYYYYY until bed.

  6. #5
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    I used to but now I’m very good (too good?) at saying no. Have realised that life’s too short to do stuff that I don’t want to do. Obviously I still do some things I don’t enjoy but it takes more for me to say yes than it used to.

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    I can normally get the first no out, clearly and without guilt. But when it becomes them asking again, or trying to change my mind, I find it hard to stick to and usually end up caving or agreeing to at least part of what I declined

  8. #7
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    i’m quite boundary oriented and have no problem putting down a boundary and saying no. it can be awkward sometimes, but honouring your own limits is more important than pleasing someone else imo.

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    I probably say no too much. I have been trying to work on my selfishness

  10. #9
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    Depends on who the person is and what I’m saying ‘no’ to.

    Sometimes I do have trouble. Sometimes I issue a ‘maybe’ but then come up with an excuse/reason to say no. In other instances I am confident enough to issue an outright no.

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    I have always struggled with saying no. Especially at work which always leads to me be so overwhelmed.
    I sometimes wish I was better at saying no


 

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