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  1. #1
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    Default Help Please!

    I posted this in another thread so sorry!
    Before you read please note that I was previously a member here while TTC no. 1 with IVF. I am all to aware of the heartache of TTC and I am in no way being ungrateful. I just need some help from some other women.
    Ok I feel terrible for posting this.. please don't judge.
    I did a HPT yesterday midday after a slight bit of spotting on Sunday. It was positive. I know what a miracle this is considering my first was IVF, second was a surprise and I have not used contraception for the past 8 years and I'm in my late 30s. So yes I get all of that. Ultrasound today showed nothing so my guess at 4 weeks was obvious.
    My dilemma is this... I think I ovulated on Wednesday. I DTD on Sat and Thursday. So yes my issue is they were with two different men (I am absolutely SINGLE). My cycle is usually 36-37 days. I also have PCOS. I know nothing can tell who the father is. My HPT showed up within 10 seconds on Monday which I am assuming was 12 DPO.
    I'm just after others experience with when they think they conceived in relation to Ovulation.
    When did you have an implantation bleed?
    If it was the Thursday DTD would Monday be too early to get a pretty instant positive? With my second the test was SOOOOOOO light at around the same time and took a long time to show up.
    Obviously the right thing is to tell both.. but I feel I want to be say it was Saturday and perhaps I ovulated early?
    Sorry for the rant.
    As I said before I am well aware of the heartache that TTC can cause - I was there for years. Despite my predicament I hope this story also gives some hope. I seriously thought I couldn't have anymore children.

  2. #2
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    I'm a little confused on which Thursday Sunday ovulation days. Can you give dates...?
    How are you feeling are you a little bit excited?

  3. #3
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    Hi Am33 sorry!
    DTD Sat 4/1
    Ovulation 8/1 (only going off usual symptoms such a really swollen tender ovaries. I usually get period 14 days after this)
    DTD Thurs 9/1 - early night if that makes a difference!
    I am in shock to be honest. Here I was deperately wanting a third for soooo long. Get divorced and now I'm pregnant and don't know who the Dad is! I feel selfish too... imagine finding out you might be a father but you don't know for sure? And the thought of being a single mum to a newborn is SCARY. But I believe everything happens for a reason!
    THank you so much for replying!

  4. #4
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    I know the pain of wanting a baby for so long and the thought of not having the chance. I was single 5 years and my sisters went through having babies together. All the families had their partners and me always the single one with my kids and noone ever seemed to understand how hard that was.
    I ached for someone to love and I ached to have another child.
    I could feel from what you wrote that you didn't seem upset to actually be pregnant.
    I believe this child is a gift for you and is no accident.

    It's hard to say which guy could be the dad.
    Mr 4th could have good sperm and have been waiting and ready for the egg to release and Mr 9th not even given a chance and also Mr 9 could have been the only contender if mr 4th had sad swimmers.
    Not much help to you I'm sorry.
    Good on you for being honest with them both I can't imagine either discussion will be an easy one. Will you wait until you're further along before you say anything?

  5. #5
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    It really could be either, especially since you can't really be sure you ovulated on 8/1. Generally an egg is able to be fertilised up to 24 hours after it's released, and generally sperm can live up to five days. Either is possible, lots of people will have had fertilisation at different times. You can get ovulation pain before, during and after ovulation, so it's not too reliable. I'm afraid you just won't know.
    I hope everything turns out well for you.

  6. #6
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    Thank you ladies.
    Although I know I won't know without a paternity test. I'm not in a relationship with either but I guess telling them will ensure I lose both - not the fact that I'm pregnant - they are both great guys - but more so not knowing for sure if it is either. My gut tells me its Mr 4th - but there are also heart strings there!
    If I ovulated later say on the Thursday or Friday would a HPT be so quick to show with pretty diluted wee on the Monday?

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Okmum View Post
    Thank you ladies.
    Although I know I won't know without a paternity test. I'm not in a relationship with either but I guess telling them will ensure I lose both - not the fact that I'm pregnant - they are both great guys - but more so not knowing for sure if it is either. My gut tells me its Mr 4th - but there are also heart strings there!
    If I ovulated later say on the Thursday or Friday would a HPT be so quick to show with pretty diluted wee on the Monday?
    I'm a bit confused about which week we're talking - do you mean Monday immediately after, as in 4 or 5 days after ovulation? If so then no, the embryo would have just arrived into the uterus at that stage, there's no way you could have a positive hpt 4/5dpo. You probably ovulated earlier if that's the case, in which case the second contender would be out.

  8. #8
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    They're too close in time to even make an estimated guess. Did you know that you can get prenatal paternity tests?

  9. #9
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    If you did the deed with man 2 on Thursday, it couldn’t be positive from him on Monday. The embryo takes 5 days to form before it implants. If I’m reading your dates right my money is on man 1

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mod-Wise Enough View Post
    If you did the deed with man 2 on Thursday, it couldn’t be positive from him on Monday. The embryo takes 5 days to form before it implants. If I’m reading your dates right my money is on man 1
    If they DTD on the 9th Jan that's 11 days after she got the BFP. Couldn't he still be a contender??


 

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