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  1. #11
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    Default Overly sensitive child?

    It’s hard to know if you do this from your posts but with my kids, I always find giving them warnings helps. Eg. In 5 mins you will have to brush your teeth. I’m going to run your bath so it’s nearly bath time. In 10 mins we are leaving the park. It’s washing hair day today etc.

    At his age and with school starting, perhaps a visual timetable to help. My youngest went through a stage of hating putting shoes on so she wasn’t allowed to play until she was ready to walk out the door. Now it’s her hair that’s the issue every day
    Last edited by BigRedV; 09-10-2019 at 11:54.

  2. #12
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    I used to work with older kids on the spectrum and they can be overly sensitive to certain things that we wouldn't typically consider triggering. Not at all suggesting your child is on the spectrum, but in reading about hyper sensitive kids, I saw similarities - reacting poorly to simple requests, changes in routine, hating to be rushed or surprised and moving at snails pace when asked to do something etc.

    I would try giving him a mini 'synopsis' of the day ahead so he's aware of what's going to be happening and when he can play and when he has to do non negotiable tasks. You could also try giving him a choice - as in, 'you can have 15 minutes of play time before you get dressed or after, which do you prefer?'

    Try starting with two days where you keep your cool no matter what - show no frustration in your tone, try to sound positive even if he's acting up but keep talking - as in, 'remember we talked about your day earlier? It's now time to do xyz'.

    Small steps! I know it's easier said than done but worth a shot if it can make your life (and his) just that bit more manageable.

  3. #13
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    Been busy all day sorry! Thanks for these replies.

    So example this morning - DS and I were getting up (he had come in bed with me while we waited for DF to get home from work) I said you will need to have breakfast shortly (not saying right that second but just soon because he knew we were going out) he started crying saying he hadn’t had a chance to play. So no raised voice, no having to stop something, just a simple note to have breakfast and he was set off.

    We do give him warnings, 10 minutes, 5 minutes, 1 minute etc and he responds really well to that. It’s not necessarily when he is being told do to something, it could be he has asked for example, to go outside, it’s raining so he can’t and I’ll say no. He starts crying like I’ve said I’m taking everything he owns and throwing it in the bin.
    We always let him know what the plan is for the day, he likes to know and I’m ok with that. We don’t spring things on him. He was diagnosed with autism, I think it was 2 years ago? Last year we had him reassessed because we didn’t think it was right and yeah he isn’t autistic. So yeah we’ve been through that.

    Thanks again though everyone. Maybe we are just going through a phase. Hopefully it’s gone soon because I’m over it!

  4. #14
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    Was he tested for adhd ?
    This sounds so much like my adhd son who is not typically hyper, he’s the other side of it which used to be add.
    Or a generalised anxiety disorder?

    As other mums have shared it could be a phase.
    I can’t give any advice because all of my kids have either asd, add or anxiety 😐
    They all exhibited this type of behaviour but my youngest boy more so with the crying. It’s because he is constantly thinking ahead and stressing he will miss out on something.

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bluebirdgirl View Post
    Was he tested for adhd ?
    This sounds so much like my adhd son who is not typically hyper, he’s the other side of it which used to be add.
    Or a generalised anxiety disorder?

    As other mums have shared it could be a phase.
    I can’t give any advice because all of my kids have either asd, add or anxiety
    They all exhibited this type of behaviour but my youngest boy more so with the crying. It’s because he is constantly thinking ahead and stressing he will miss out on something.
    When we first mentioned ADHD to paediatrician who diagnosed DS with autism he laughed and said no but he was rude, wasn’t a good experience. We mentioned it to the paediatrician who reassessed DS and he said he doesn’t believe he has it. That is 100% DS though, he has a fear of missing out. To the point he won’t eat all day because he might miss out on playing or doing something (we went to dreamworld a couple of months ago, he tried to not have to eat or go to the toilet all day in case he missed out) he isn’t as bad at home though.

    He has shown some anxiety towards starting kindy next year. Telling us how nervous he is etc. so maybe this is stemming from that?

  6. #16
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    It can take a while for all of the symptoms to emerge but I hope they are right and it’s not adhd.
    Sounds as if he is having anxiety and that he’s an over thinker.
    There are different types of adhd though and it’s a lot more than most people believe.
    Especially if they aren’t presenting with any actual hyperactivity.
    I hope you can find something to help him. I know how distressing it all can be.

    Oh also edited to add, if I were to give my son a run down on what was happening in a day he would start stressing about it and get anxious. Sometimes giving them too much information makes things worse because they get overwhelmed easily.

  7. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bluebirdgirl View Post
    It can take a while for all of the symptoms to emerge but I hope they are right and it’s not adhd.
    Sounds as if he is having anxiety and that he’s an over thinker.
    There are different types of adhd though and it’s a lot more than most people believe.
    Especially if they aren’t presenting with any actual hyperactivity.
    I hope you can find something to help him. I know how distressing it all can be.

    Oh also edited to add, if I were to give my son a run down on what was happening in a day he would start stressing about it and get anxious. Sometimes giving them too much information makes things worse because they get overwhelmed easily.
    Sorry I didn’t see this comment!

    Thanks, I do think he has some issues with anxiety (I have anxiety so it’s not that big of a stretch for DS to have it) I’m not exactly sure what to do but I will be seeing my own psychologist soon so I may speak to her about some ideas. We’ve tried seeing a psych for DS, fear of thunderstorms, I don’t feel we got much from him, it wasn’t overly helpful (he seemed lost with a younger child)

    I didn’t really think about that, that could be a problem and maybe ds is struggling because he’s overwhelmed

  8. #18
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    I hope you find some help @Hasselhoff
    We did the child psychologist when we were seeking a diagnosis. I didn’t feel it was doing anything. I had booked in to see a lifeline counsellor but then we have a bunch of things coming up and no time for extra things. I think I will try again in the new year.

    An occupational therapist gave us a chart type idea to try and that sent my sons anxiety over the edge. He couldn’t cope with recognising his behaviour. He only wanted to see he was winning and doing it all correctly.
    I had anxiety as a child too (of course still do) and it sucks to see it playing out in my kids but especially my 8 year old is a lot like me.


 

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