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  1. #1
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    Default Parents with partners who work away

    Hi,

    My husband is 5 months into his new FIFO job and we are still finding our feet with this new lifestyle. Everything has been pretty smooth sailing so far, however it’s as though it’s just sort of hit the kids and they are a bit out of sorts. Anyway I just wanted to connect with other parents going through the same thing! 😊

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    My husband is FIFO, and has been forever. Probably will be forever too as his career is something that you can't generally do local. My kids are fine thankfully as it's what they're used to. What sort of roster does he do?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mumof3Crazies View Post
    My husband is FIFO, and has been forever. Probably will be forever too as his career is something that you can't generally do local. My kids are fine thankfully as it's what they're used to. What sort of roster does he do?
    He is 2 and 2 which has been a great roster so far. What roster does your hubby do? My kids are 12 10 & 7 so really used to having dad around. How do you cope with it all? Is it just the norm for you now?

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    Ohhh 2 & 2 is the dream!! My 3 are just used to it. It doesnt stop them being sad, but they understand. He is on a weird roster, its 9/5 days with travel.

    I cope ... okay. Some days are tougher than others. The thing I struggle with the most is housework. My 3 can be absolute ferals and only 1 is actually helpful (they're 7, 5, and 2). But the income isn't enough to justify a cleaner lol. When I worked I had one.

    The kids being in school helps, as it stops me going crazy and keeps me in a routine.

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    Hey,
    My husband has been a FIFO for ever and our DS and I coped fine, I just had to have a routine so everything got done. He has recently like 1 month ago came home for good and I'm now working more as he is home. We have never spent so much time together and it's amazing and I love it and our DS loves it but it's just getting used to change.
    Like you getting used to your hubby working away I'm now getting used to mine being home for the first time.
    All the best hun

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    Default Parents with partners who work away

    My hubby works away and we have a 10 month old. It helps to have frozen meals organised because after work and daycare when he is clingy as it is impossible to get groceries or cook a meal. I come straight home and play, dinner, bath and put baby to bed and then I get my time. I have Decluttered our home considerably so that cleaning is a fast process and not a whole day thing like it was before. Baby does get a bit emotional when he isn’t home but I feel that kids adapt to anything plus it is so exciting when daddy comes home! It will work our fine it is just finding a balance that works for you. Good luck!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mumof3Crazies View Post
    Ohhh 2 & 2 is the dream!! My 3 are just used to it. It doesnt stop them being sad, but they understand. He is on a weird roster, its 9/5 days with travel.

    I cope ... okay. Some days are tougher than others. The thing I struggle with the most is housework. My 3 can be absolute ferals and only 1 is actually helpful (they're 7, 5, and 2). But the income isn't enough to justify a cleaner lol. When I worked I had one.

    The kids being in school helps, as it stops me going crazy and keeps me in a routine.
    Oh yes I hear you about the housework it’s never ending! A cleaner would be amazing!

    It’s just the constant that can be draining. Especially with work, school home work sport practice during the week sport on weekends, cooking, cleaning the list goes on as you would know. Honestly though it’s been pretty good I just try not to stop and think about it to much.

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    Quote Originally Posted by shellzand View Post
    My hubby works away and we have a 10 month old. It helps to have frozen meals organised because after work and daycare when he is clingy as it is impossible to get groceries or cook a meal. I come straight home and play, dinner, bath and put baby to bed and then I get my time. I have Decluttered our home considerably so that cleaning is a fast process and not a whole day thing like it was before. Baby does get a bit emotional when he isn’t home but I feel that kids adapt to anything plus it is so exciting when daddy comes home! It will work our fine it is just finding a balance that works for you. Good luck!
    Thanks for your reply! Yes I figured out pretty quickly that organisation is the key. The logistics of getting everyone everywhere can be tricky sometimes but we muddle through. I think because the kids ages and having dad here their whole lives it has made the transition a little tricker but they are managing ok. The youngest is a bit out of sorts but he will get there. Whats your hubbys roster?

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    Hubby no longer works FIFO, but did it for a number of years on varying rosters, the bulk of the time he was doing 6-8 weeks away, 2-4 days home. He did 4 away and 2 home for a while and right before he left was doing 5 days/2 days. When he started we had 3 kids who were 6, 3 and 12 months and I fell pregnant with our 4th just after he started too. We all coped OK for the most part, as others have said some days/weeks were harder than others especially when he first went back after the 4th was born. I found setting myself and the kids a routine while he was gone definitely helped, the stuff we did when he was away was different to the stuff we would do when he was home. We had a calendar so we could count down how long til he came home, facetimed or Skyped as much as we could especially when the kids were missing him.

    At that time, we lived about 4.5 hours away from our family and friends so it was pretty isolating. In the end we made the decision that the kids and I would move back to my hometown to be closer to my family and support network, which helped the kids immensely. By then hubby had been doing it for a few years and was getting pretty over it, plus I'd decided to start studying so he made the decision to come home and work locally. He still did small stints away for about 6 months, gone Monday to Friday and home weekends, but he was also working close enough that he could drive home in an emergency.

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    Quote Originally Posted by SheWarrior View Post
    Hubby no longer works FIFO, but did it for a number of years on varying rosters, the bulk of the time he was doing 6-8 weeks away, 2-4 days home. He did 4 away and 2 home for a while and right before he left was doing 5 days/2 days. When he started we had 3 kids who were 6, 3 and 12 months and I fell pregnant with our 4th just after he started too. We all coped OK for the most part, as others have said some days/weeks were harder than others especially when he first went back after the 4th was born. I found setting myself and the kids a routine while he was gone definitely helped, the stuff we did when he was away was different to the stuff we would do when he was home. We had a calendar so we could count down how long til he came home, facetimed or Skyped as much as we could especially when the kids were missing him.

    At that time, we lived about 4.5 hours away from our family and friends so it was pretty isolating. In the end we made the decision that the kids and I would move back to my hometown to be closer to my family and support network, which helped the kids immensely. By then hubby had been doing it for a few years and was getting pretty over it, plus I'd decided to start studying so he made the decision to come home and work locally. He still did small stints away for about 6 months, gone Monday to Friday and home weekends, but he was also working close enough that he could drive home in an emergency.
    Wow they were long stints... your amazing!! We are pretty lucky that we live in a small country town with lots of support (not that I use it but it’s nice To know there are people there if I need them). We are adjusting pretty well. It’s actually so nice to have him home for solid blocks to do school runs and sports etc. Our youngest has been doing much better which is a relief. Hopefully things remain positive. We just keep checking in with each other to make sure we are both going ok.... so far so good!


 

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