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  1. #1
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    Unhappy TTC naturally with endo but feeling defeated :-(

    Hello Lovely Ones,

    I'm feeling a bit down and defeated today and I just really wanted to connect with other beautiful ladies who understand. I hope that's ok and I'm not being too much of a downer! <3

    I really, really, really, thought this was our month. For months I've had January and September in my head as our conception and delivery months and everything just felt right. My period was due yesterday, temps and pain confirmed ovulation, and temps the last few days were looking good. No AF yesterday and I was starting to get excited, however BFN on a test (admittedly and internet cheapie). I was disappointed but still hopeful. But this morning my temp dropped slightly and I'm starting to feel the usual AF niggles so I think perhaps I just ovulated a day later than I thought and I might be out this month.

    I'm trying hard to hold onto hope and positivity for this cycle, but I feel like I'm on the edge of bursting into tears and not stopping! :-( I'm usually a positive and upbeat person, but I just feel tired and drained today, so I'm really struggling.

    A bit of background: we've been trying for our first baby for over 3 years now. I have moderate - severe endo that I'm mostly managing naturally. (My body really doesn't do well with medications or chemicals). I had two laparoscopies within a few months at the end of 2017 and was hopeful they would help, but my symptoms actually got worse afterwards. I tried Clomid for a few months but all it gave me was severe pain and 20kg of weight gain. I've been seeing a naturopath, acupuncturist, and fertility specialist and all tests are coming back good, so we've officially been diagnosed with 'unexplained infertility'.

    Next step is IUI, but the Clomid and my last surgery caused so much pain and so many issues that I'm now absolutely terrified about any more medicated treatments. Hubby also isn't really keen on moving onto the next step.

    I guess I'm just looking for hope or some words of encouragement. I know our time will come, I'm just a bit tired today.

    Thank you Lovelies, sending love and baby dust to you all! xoxo

  2. #2
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    Hey Lauzzi,

    I can't speak for all the lovelies ladies here but I can share with you my experiences.

    DH and I have been TTC for 4 years, we had our first round of IVF plus ICSI in Aug-Sept last year, they collected 16 eggs, 11 fertilised, 5 started to grow but then they all stopped and the cycle failed.

    I have PCOS and DH has a low sperm count but all the FS could tell me was my eggs are a bad quality.

    He hasn't spoken to me since that so we have no idea exactly why so we have an appointment in March to find out why and what the next steps are.

    I understand the pain, I'm generally a happy, bubbly person but this journey definitely tries to break you down.

    Sweetheart, you are not alone and if you ever need support, just hop onto the site and you will find plenty of words of love xxx

  3. #3
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    Kitty26, thank you so much Lovely. <3

    I just needed to feel connected today and your beautiful words have really helped! (Although I shouldn't have read this at work as I was fighting tears while reading!)

    I'm so sorry you've had to go through that. I hope you get some answers in March and a happy ending for both of us this year!

    It really does try to break you! I'm learning to accept the down days and let the emotion out, then I try to look forward to the next wonderful thing in my life. We've had lots of holidays these past few years, haha. But they give me something to focus on and look forward to.

    Baby dust and big hugs! xoxo

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to lauzzi For This Useful Post:

    Kitty 26 (01-02-2019)

  5. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by lauzzi View Post
    Hello Lovely Ones,

    I'm feeling a bit down and defeated today and I just really wanted to connect with other beautiful ladies who understand. I hope that's ok and I'm not being too much of a downer! <3

    I really, really, really, thought this was our month. For months I've had January and September in my head as our conception and delivery months and everything just felt right. My period was due yesterday, temps and pain confirmed ovulation, and temps the last few days were looking good. No AF yesterday and I was starting to get excited, however BFN on a test (admittedly and internet cheapie). I was disappointed but still hopeful. But this morning my temp dropped slightly and I'm starting to feel the usual AF niggles so I think perhaps I just ovulated a day later than I thought and I might be out this month.

    I'm trying hard to hold onto hope and positivity for this cycle, but I feel like I'm on the edge of bursting into tears and not stopping! :-( I'm usually a positive and upbeat person, but I just feel tired and drained today, so I'm really struggling.

    A bit of background: we've been trying for our first baby for over 3 years now. I have moderate - severe endo that I'm mostly managing naturally. (My body really doesn't do well with medications or chemicals). I had two laparoscopies within a few months at the end of 2017 and was hopeful they would help, but my symptoms actually got worse afterwards. I tried Clomid for a few months but all it gave me was severe pain and 20kg of weight gain. I've been seeing a naturopath, acupuncturist, and fertility specialist and all tests are coming back good, so we've officially been diagnosed with 'unexplained infertility'.

    Next step is IUI, but the Clomid and my last surgery caused so much pain and so many issues that I'm now absolutely terrified about any more medicated treatments. Hubby also isn't really keen on moving onto the next step.

    I guess I'm just looking for hope or some words of encouragement. I know our time will come, I'm just a bit tired today.

    Thank you Lovelies, sending love and baby dust to you all! xoxo
    Hi!
    Wow you really are trying everything you possibly can - I’m so sorry it hasn’t worked out so far. It took DH & I 2 years ... I’ve recently been diagnosed with endometriosis (although I’ve had symptoms I ignored for years - pretty much from my first period). My doctor said without a doubt the endo would’ve been what made it so hard.

    Two months before we conceived I went vegan. I noticed less pain during my cycle & I always wondered if it was a coincidence that I conceived shortly after. I went back to eating everything when I was pregnant, & now 6 months after giving birth I’ve been vegan for the last month. The last period I had was soooo much better than usual. I had no pain I couldn’t believe it! After looking into it I did find the endometriosis Australia website does recommended cutting down on red meat & dairy - so clearly there may be a link.

    I don’t like to go around preaching to everyone about my vegan lifestyle lol. But since I feel it helped me so much & you seem to be trying everything else I couldn’t read & run without sharing my experience. It might be something to consider trying? There’s no harm in it.

    I hope you don’t mind my suggestion - I don’t mean to sound pushy or give unwelcome suggestions. I really hope you can conceive soon xxx

  6. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by lauzzi View Post
    Kitty26, thank you so much Lovely. <3

    I just needed to feel connected today and your beautiful words have really helped! (Although I shouldn't have read this at work as I was fighting tears while reading!)

    I'm so sorry you've had to go through that. I hope you get some answers in March and a happy ending for both of us this year!

    It really does try to break you! I'm learning to accept the down days and let the emotion out, then I try to look forward to the next wonderful thing in my life. We've had lots of holidays these past few years, haha. But they give me something to focus on and look forward to.

    Baby dust and big hugs! xoxo
    Aww lovely,

    I didn't mean to make you cry x

    This whole journey shows us all our, how strong we really are.

    Holidays are wonderful things to look forward too.

  7. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by KJane13 View Post
    Hi!
    Wow you really are trying everything you possibly can - I’m so sorry it hasn’t worked out so far. It took DH & I 2 years ... I’ve recently been diagnosed with endometriosis (although I’ve had symptoms I ignored for years - pretty much from my first period). My doctor said without a doubt the endo would’ve been what made it so hard.

    Two months before we conceived I went vegan. I noticed less pain during my cycle & I always wondered if it was a coincidence that I conceived shortly after. I went back to eating everything when I was pregnant, & now 6 months after giving birth I’ve been vegan for the last month. The last period I had was soooo much better than usual. I had no pain I couldn’t believe it! After looking into it I did find the endometriosis Australia website does recommended cutting down on red meat & dairy - so clearly there may be a link.

    I don’t like to go around preaching to everyone about my vegan lifestyle lol. But since I feel it helped me so much & you seem to be trying everything else I couldn’t read & run without sharing my experience. It might be something to consider trying? There’s no harm in it.

    I hope you don’t mind my suggestion - I don’t mean to sound pushy or give unwelcome suggestions. I really hope you can conceive soon xxx

    Hi KJane13!

    Thank you so much for replying!

    You're not being pushy or unwelcome at all, thank you for sharing what's helped you! I know all too well just how much what we consume has an impact on endo and I'm a massive advocate for healing through food!

    I'm mostly paleo and only eat a little red meat, but I have been thinking that maybe I need to change things up a bit or get stricter. My pain is mostly under control thanks to my diet and lifestyle, but I have let a lot of inflammatory foods creep back in recently... I have a real sweet tooth! It's actually funny you say that as my naturopath recently mentioned that a few of her endo clients were having success with going vegan, so perhaps this is a sign.

    Do you eat much in the way of oats, grains, or rice? I think sometimes I get too hung up on sticking to a certain way rather than just seeing what works for me, so perhaps I'll focus a bit more on reducing out meat and eggs. (I'm already dairy free. :-))

    It's pretty amazing how much food choices can impact pain, isn't it! There are also so many wonderful natural products out there, combined with amazing medical technology, so there are still many things for me to try!

    Your story gives me hope, thank you so much for sharing and congratulations on your little one!

  8. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kitty 26 View Post
    Aww lovely,

    I didn't mean to make you cry x

    This whole journey shows us all our, how strong we really are.

    Holidays are wonderful things to look forward too.
    Kitty26, I feel better after letting out some of the emotion so I think it was a good thing! Another lady at work who's been through the same things also asked me how I was going and hugged me, so of course that set me off again! But I'm feeling a little more stable now.

    It really does show your strength, doesn't it! I've also made some beautiful friends and connections all over the world as a result, so I try to see the blessings.

    Holidays sure are wonderful things to look forward to. I'm very grateful that we've been able to take some wonderful ones over the last few years, so I can look back and smile. :-)

    xoxo

  9. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by lauzzi View Post
    Kitty26, I feel better after letting out some of the emotion so I think it was a good thing! Another lady at work who's been through the same things also asked me how I was going and hugged me, so of course that set me off again! But I'm feeling a little more stable now.

    It really does show your strength, doesn't it! I've also made some beautiful friends and connections all over the world as a result, so I try to see the blessings.

    Holidays sure are wonderful things to look forward to. I'm very grateful that we've been able to take some wonderful ones over the last few years, so I can look back and smile. :-)

    xoxo
    That's good, it is good to cry

    I'm so glad you've been able to contact with lovely ppl, it really helps to talk with those who understand

    If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here x

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    lauzzi (01-02-2019)

  11. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kitty 26 View Post
    That's good, it is good to cry

    I'm so glad you've been able to contact with lovely ppl, it really helps to talk with those who understand

    If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here x
    So true, sometimes a good cry is just what you need!

    It really does make a difference talking to lovely ladies like yourself who truly understand and are going through a similar thing.

    Thank you Lovely, and right back at you! I'm also here for anyone who wants to chat or vent! xx

  12. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by lauzzi View Post
    Hello Lovely Ones,

    I'm feeling a bit down and defeated today and I just really wanted to connect with other beautiful ladies who understand. I hope that's ok and I'm not being too much of a downer! <3

    I really, really, really, thought this was our month. For months I've had January and September in my head as our conception and delivery months and everything just felt right. My period was due yesterday, temps and pain confirmed ovulation, and temps the last few days were looking good. No AF yesterday and I was starting to get excited, however BFN on a test (admittedly and internet cheapie). I was disappointed but still hopeful. But this morning my temp dropped slightly and I'm starting to feel the usual AF niggles so I think perhaps I just ovulated a day later than I thought and I might be out this month.

    I'm trying hard to hold onto hope and positivity for this cycle, but I feel like I'm on the edge of bursting into tears and not stopping! :-( I'm usually a positive and upbeat person, but I just feel tired and drained today, so I'm really struggling.

    A bit of background: we've been trying for our first baby for over 3 years now. I have moderate - severe endo that I'm mostly managing naturally. (My body really doesn't do well with medications or chemicals). I had two laparoscopies within a few months at the end of 2017 and was hopeful they would help, but my symptoms actually got worse afterwards. I tried Clomid for a few months but all it gave me was severe pain and 20kg of weight gain. I've been seeing a naturopath, acupuncturist, and fertility specialist and all tests are coming back good, so we've officially been diagnosed with 'unexplained infertility'.

    Next step is IUI, but the Clomid and my last surgery caused so much pain and so many issues that I'm now absolutely terrified about any more medicated treatments. Hubby also isn't really keen on moving onto the next step.

    I guess I'm just looking for hope or some words of encouragement. I know our time will come, I'm just a bit tired today.

    Thank you Lovelies, sending love and baby dust to you all! xoxo
    Hey,

    I have endo, it took me a year and a half to get a gp to take me seriously as it was suspected but undiagnosed. I was also TTC at the same time and after a year I ended up in tears because I was in pain and I still wasn't pregnant and the gp I saw basically laughed in my face and didn't believe endo was a thing and because I'm young told me to try for another year before investigating becaude my bloods were ok.
    I sought help through a natural fertility clinic and they found me a specialist that did endo and fertility and then the specialists clinic gave me some doctors who would do me a referral. In march last year I finally had surgery and was diagnosed with endo! I had lesions mainly on my left ovary and in my cervix which was removed, had a d&c and got my tubes flushed also which were clear.
    A month after surgery we started on clomid and a trigger and continued with accupuncture for 5 cycles which all were unsuccessful. I absolutely hated clomid!! I felt like **** and was always angry, upset and depressed. I was meant to do a 6th cycle but I took a break, then the month after that I was put on fsh injections and a trigger and foubd the side effects weren't as bad. I also had a rep at work give me a bottle of lifespace pregnancy & breastfeeding probiotics and they really helped balance my lining, ph levels and also made my periods flow a little better so that probiotic is worth a try!! After the first cycle of injections we did an IUI cycle that failed also. My period was about 9 days late after my IUI and that got us into the last IVF cycle of the year which sucked because I was on 3 different injections and then had to do EPU, then progesterone pessaries.
    I found out 3 days after christmas that I was pregnant and am now currently 9w + 4d! I had to continue my progesterone until 8w which was gross and annoying. I am petrified of needles so that made everything really hard to get through and I had to get other people to give me my injections because my husband also has a fear of needles!
    Pregnancy and endo symptoms are so similar, especially if you have used any meds to stimulate your ovaries, so as hard as it is try not to read into those symptoms because it messes with you. I found other things to distract me from thinking about it and always kept a positive mind even after each unsuccessful cycle.

    Best of luck with your journey xxx


 

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