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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rachel3072 View Post
    I find joint accounts fascinating. I could never do it. DH and I keep our money completely separate. He pays mortgage, utilities, rates, insurances etc, and food once a fortnight. I pay for all kids expenses, internet, and food the other fortnight. Whatever is left is ours to spend and or save, nobody has to justify anything, ask or discuss. I'm usually broke a lot though haha so guess that means either Im worse with money or the kids expenses add up to a lot more! Personally I think it is the latter, but I'd hate to change it. I like the freedom. Someone giving me an allowance like I was a child would infuriate me.
    I'm exactly the same. I sort of envy couples who can sit down and sort their finances out to the dollar, but I need my own money. So after bills etc are paid, the rest is mine/his to do what we like with. We have a joint account for direct debits but we get paid into our own separate accounts. I agree with the PP that maybe you should cover all costs, put some away in savings and then the rest can be play money? My hubby is terrible with money too but at least this way, there's a bit more freedom so I'm not getting all worked up about every dollar that he spends.

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  3. #22
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    I like what everyone has suggested re the spreadsheet.
    Put down to the cent everything that comes out / needs to be paid for each month, if you have annual bills like rates etc put them down too and divide by 12 so you can see roughly what the monthly cost is.
    Then show him and get him involved in the best way to manage the money. Let him come to the party on how you guys could do it better etc and save. Perhaps there is something you guys could save for eg a holiday that could kick start his motivation.

    FWIW, I manage our money. We have joint account and a joint credit card. We get paid monthly and the day we get paid I go an transfer / pay bills etc at the end of it all I let hubby know how much we saved.
    We also give ourselves a $600 allowance a month each, so $150 a week. This is for petrol and any lunches / luxuries we want. At the end of the month if we have any left we put it aside and it’s ours to do what we like with it. For instance mine generally goes towards and pays for my hair and waxings.

    Once you get on a roll and the money is being saved / managed better it becomes addictive I find to do it better the next month haha

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  5. #23
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    I manage our money as df is absolutely useless. When we lived separately, he racked up so much debt as he'd blow his money, not pay his bills, then ask me for essentials to get through. When we moved In together I said that's not how things would work, our bills come first, then necessities, savings and then I luxury.

    He still has his account. I have 2. We each get paid into our individual accounts.
    I sat down and worked out all bills, birthdays, special events etc for the year, and divided it into weekly same weekly amount.

    When we get paid, that amount comes straight out, and sent to my second account which all direct debits come out of/bills are paid from. From there, I sort out necessities - food, petrol, haircuts, incidental school things, medications, clothing, pet things like grooming for the dog, etc etc...

    At the end, what's left we discuss what we'd like after that... e.g. take away dinner/ eating out, if I want my legs waxed or he needs something for his car or pc that's not actually needed, wanna take the kids somewhere etc.

    Sometimes if there's a lot left we each get $$. I'll get iTunes, clothes or stuff for the kids and he will blow it on energy drinks like red bull, take away coffee and junk food, or online gaming additions.... that day.

    Growing up neither of us had a lot of money, but I witnessed my mum scrapping to make ends meet while they ran a business, and purchssed a house. Even if things were tough, we made it and had something to show for it.
    Df witnessed his mum on centrelink, drinking, smoking and living with others. They never had anything to show for it, and were the type who'd live like kings (drinking,smoking,splurge on irrelevant unnecessary things like new phones every few pays when the credit ran out, or cheap cars a few times a year, road trip and stay in motels till it all ran out then head to a mates to live until next pay) for payday, and the next day or so, then be beggars till their next pay.
    Last edited by shadowangel0205; 02-01-2019 at 08:42.

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  7. #24
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    Default How to get your partner on board with a budget?

    Like others have said, write up a budget with all the essentials in it. I did this a couple of years ago and was shocked at how much everything costs when you add it all up - car insurance, rego, servicing, tires, toll roads, savings for when the car will eventually need replacing, drivers licence, child restraints, house insurance, mortgage, rates, utilities, electricity, gas, maintenance, pool servicing, gardening, health insurance, doctors appointments, prescriptions, glasses/contacts, dental, daycare, school fees, uniforms, kids sports, other kids stuff (hats, lunchboxes, drink bottles, etc), presents (birthdays, Xmas, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, weddings, thank you gifts), furniture / electronics (when they break or need upgrade), clothes, food, cleaning products, internet, mobiles, Netflix, Foxtel, holidays, passports (eg I just renewed mine and it was $450 ). Agh!! Show him how much all of this costs. And then show him how much is left over after all of this is paid for. The leftovers should be for luxuries AND savings. If you’re not the one paying all the bills I think it’s easy to simply not realise how much it all costs.
    Last edited by babyno1onboard; 02-01-2019 at 08:56.

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  9. #25
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    Thanks for all the suggestions! I'm going to try find a good time to sit him down I have put everything into a spreadsheet for weekly and the year and have made note to colour code which are my own personal expenses and his so he can actually see what he is spending is insane. I think maybe seeing it as a yearly amount rather than the weekly might put it in to perspective as it could be a car instead or similar.

    Now to get him to sit and look at it. I'm hoping he's receptive and we can pick some things to save towards that would make him more inclined to cut back.

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  11. #26
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    Barefoot Investor changed our lives- we went from 2 incomes to 1, to 1.5, but kept spending at the 2 FT levels. We were going backwards and didn't even realise.
    Now we don't worry (or fight) about money, and we actually have a plan. It would be hard if your OH is not on board with it.
    *But*, as you've taken over the finances, I would do it 100%. Institute the B.I. steps and structures. Give him his own splurge account, and he can spend how he likes. And then show him how over 1/2/6/12 months you'll have money for things and out of debt.
    Sometimes you have to suck it and see
    Last edited by SJ565; 03-01-2019 at 10:03.

  12. #27
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    thought i’d post in here rather than start a new thread or clutter up an existing unrelated one. those who budget, please tell me how do you take advantage of things on special without blowing that week’s budget or sacrificing on other things you need to buy? dh and i have usually tended to stock up on things we use regularly if they’re on special (kitchen towel is one thing that jumps to mind right away). we were doing the weekly grocery shop today and despite being on a strict budget, dh still kept trying to load up on stuff that was cheap. so i’m like yeah but we have a limited amount of $ to spend on groceries this week, we either blow the budget or it means we sacrifice buying other stuff we need for the week. he’s still not really getting the idea of a budget, kept trying to buy little luxuries etc. i was perpetually walking around like 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀

    anyway we got the essentials (i was calculating as we went) then went back and got a couple of other things that put us over. but overall we only went a few $ over so i’m not gonna sweat it.

    but i realized i hadn’t considered the buy in bulk thing. how do others do it? i mean it’s useful to take advantage of specials when they’re available but it’s hard when you’re trying to stick to a set amount of spending per shop?

  13. #28
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    When I was strictly sticking to a food budget, I spent less than my weekly grocery budget and saved the underspend to put towards future bulk buys of non perishables that were on sale. I found withdrawing my budget in cash and having a small purse for food money only was the easiest way to make this happen.

    ETA it is definitely worth stocking up on certain items when they are on sale. eg I always wait for a half price sales on OMO, dishwasher tabs, razors all of which can be expensive. Oh, and things like pads, tampons, sunscreen etc, I always stock up on when on sale.
    Last edited by SSecret Squirrel; 03-02-2019 at 20:52.

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  15. #29
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    the issue is, we never spend less than the allocated amount. granted this was only week 2 and we are going ok, but i just don’t know how to make it stretch so there’s left over. dh is extremely picky about what he’ll eat/not eat, which makes it harder too. the whole grocery shop ends up being a tense stand off as i try to make us stick to the plan and he’s off trying to bulk buy. we did end up loading up on almond milk which was very cheap, and i know stocking up on cheap stuff pays dividends in the future, but i’m struggling to both stick to the allocated amount AND take advantage of good savings.

  16. #30
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    our weekly budget is $220, which i think it pretty good. that’s for dh and i and ds and includes all meals, snacks and beverages (no booze) plus all other non perishables and non food grocery items. i tried to make it an amount that we had to strive to meet, without a set budget we’d usually spend around $260-$290 per grocery shop. so i figured $220 forces us to cut out the unnecessary crap and luxury items and spontaneous purchases. which it has. we are also wasting way less food which i’m thrilled about, in addition to working our way through the pantry/freezer and making do with stuff we have on hand here already. we are food hoarders, we both know it. so this is great to try and consume less, waste less and hopefully save some money in the process.


 

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