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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unicorn78 View Post
    Hi ladies, I just got a BFN from my last little PGS tested embryo so now am pursuing donor eggs.

    I am tossing up Spain or Greece but leaning towards IVF Spain. I'm planning on sending my info off tonight and arranging a skype consult ASAP. I'd like to be doing a cycle by February next year so need to get the ball rolling!

    Is anyone interested in chatting as we go through this process?

    I'm so sorry to hear this news x

    If I can be of any help with our experience with IVF Spain, please message me and I'll help where I can. It's such a big process but no doubt whichever clinic you go with between Spain and Greece, they're going to be good.

    Both Embryoland and IVF Spain are fantastic from my investigations.

    When it come to crunch time for me it was between Israel and Spain but I followed my instincts and went with IVF Spain.

    Good luck and please know you're in my thoughts, I know how tough it is to experience a BFN and if you need to talk to someone who understands, I'm here. xx

  2. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Risa78 View Post
    Hi @Unicorn78

    Sorry about the BFN xx

    I also just got a BFN today on my last own egg cycle and am getting the ball rolling on donor egg (well double donor for me as I’ll use a sperm donor too).

    Would love to cycle in Feb or March if I can.

    I’m still deciding on country. The US is leading for me at the moment, as I can get an ID release sperm donor, but not much of a thread for that one!

    Anyway best of luck and happy to chat - we might be looking at different clinics but I guess a lot of the journey is similar no matter where you go!

    R
    Thanks @Risa78.

    I'm sorry about your BFN too.

    I'm feeling surprisingly ok about it. I suppose I didn't hold out much hope for our last embryo as although it was PGS tested, it was a slow developer frozen late on day 6, then thawed to test and frozen again. The poor little thing had been through a lot! I have been looking into donor eggs for a while now and feel really ready for this next step.

    I see you're on the Greece thread so I might jump on in there too!

  3. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Unicorn78 For This Useful Post:

    gorgeousgeorge (13-01-2019),Risa78 (13-11-2018),RubyT78 (12-05-2019)

  4. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ves View Post
    I'm so sorry to hear this news x

    If I can be of any help with our experience with IVF Spain, please message me and I'll help where I can. It's such a big process but no doubt whichever clinic you go with between Spain and Greece, they're going to be good.

    Both Embryoland and IVF Spain are fantastic from my investigations.

    When it come to crunch time for me it was between Israel and Spain but I followed my instincts and went with IVF Spain.

    Good luck and please know you're in my thoughts, I know how tough it is to experience a BFN and if you need to talk to someone who understands, I'm here. xx
    Thank you @Ves, I'm actually feeling ok. I'm trying to coordinate a skype consult with IVF Spain for 2 weeks time and looking forward to getting the ball rolling. Hopefully some young eggs will be the answer for us!

    Can I please ask you one thing - my husband and I are both quite fair skinned and we and all of our family members have blue or green eyes. My husband is a little bit concerned about whether they will match us with someone who has the same colouring or whether we'll end up with an olive skinned brown eyed baby! Do you feel like your donor was a good match?

  5. #14
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    Yeah I was surprisingly ok with it too. I expected to have one last good old cry. But when I got AF I was fine because I’d expected it and I think I’d already cried it all out after the disaster of EPU.

    I am impatient to get started on DE though!

    R

  6. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by waitingonadream View Post
    Hi @Ves,

    Congrats on your little one and thanks for sharing information on your journey. You are one strong lady! We are on cycle 6 and still trying to have faith and keep hope alive. We are at the stage where we still don't know if it's embryo quality or my body rejecting embryo implantation. We have had 2 chemical pregnancies and 3 BFN results. We've now done PGS testing here and the embryos were all normal but unfortunately, they didn't stick. How did you make the decision to go overseas and know to go down the donor path? Any insights you feel comfortable sharing would be great, I appreciate it.

    Also, how come you flew home the day after transfer? I didn't realise you could fly so soon after? Did the clinic advise this was okay?

    Thank you so much

    You're very kind but when I think back on what we've been through I have no idea how I managed or how I got through it, we just kept moving forward I guess. I knew I had to accept my feelings regardless how sad, angry, bitter, depressed they were but I also knew if I didn't pick myself up, no one would, and it would destroy my relationship with my husband. We grew closer through the process thankfully.

    I think in our case we just weren't ready to give up just yet. IVF Spain was our last attempt, so we were at a stage of having a plan B if it didn't work and accepted that it might just be us for the future. I think I mentioned in my review how full of despair I was in the day before transfer, it was nerve racking and so heartbreakingly sad all in one.

    I flew home the next day because the doctor said it was no problems at all and it had no impact. When I got a BFP I couldn’t help but wonder if the altitude from flying had something to do with it…. Haha. Stupid I know but after 17 failed cycles it’s hard not to analyse every little difference.

    We didn't know as well if it was egg quality or my body rejecting it. Throughout the process of the 17 cycles before heading to IVF Spain, I had transfusions for potential natural killer cells (just in case) for about 6 transfers, I had 8 hysteroscopies to have a scratch and a lipoidal flush; I had 5 laparoscopies and the last lap I had I had a salpingectomy to move both tubes to increase my chances of implantation incase they were leaking fluid and to reduce the risk of ovarian cancer as ivf medication increases our risk by a third for getting ovarian cancer. After all the ivf drugs I’d had, I thought it would be best to help myself as much as I could with what I could. There’s no hard and fast factual finding to support this but it’s a highly popularised medical theory based on the numbers, so I erred on the side of caution and had them removed.

    I tried all the recommendations from other IVF’ers such as royal jelly, acupuncture, diet, pineapple core, drinking pineapple juice, etc…. I tried them all! The way I look at it now – if there was something special that we as women could do to fall pregnant throughout the IVF process, our IVF specialist would know and would tell us as they want their stats to look good, so they get all the new patients and all the $$$!!

    Our eggs would mostly make it to day five and would always be graded a BB or AB. The laboratory were always happy with the quality so we just kept thinking it was my uterus and maybe I had natural killer cells and my body was rejecting them.

    After everything we had tried, we thought it was crunch time – “do we give donor egg a shot or do we quit?”. This was a big call for us both but after everything mentioned above, we went with a donor and after quite a lot of procrastination and hesitation. After the Embryologist said that to me (as mentioned in my review), I knew I couldn’t do any more cycles myself.

    The thing that I kept reminding myself throughout the process was – IVF isn’t an exact science, there’s a lot of grey and a lot of dark matter no one really knows what the hell they’re doing. It’s tinkering with a model until a tinker works so to speak!

    Every step of the way, we asked each other and ourselves “were we doing the right thing” as it’s a big deal and very stressful to put 100% trust in an overseas clinic, a donor then let fate decide. IVF Spain have legal obligations to adhere to, that was a big thing for us. They’re obligated to find a donor that has very similar characteristics as you, they have laws to protect the donors identify and ours; their technology was top notch and their stats prove it. That’s why we went with them.

    I’m an Accountant by profession but I’ve also studied Criminology & Criminal Justice and focused a lot on trait theories and went into ‘is it nature or nurture’ quite a lot. I’m a big believer in nurture being the dominate contributor to behaviour, personality and lifestyle outcome. There’s a lot of studies for and against on each side but I guess it come down to we just wanted a family; it didn’t matter what we were given, we will love our little boy no matter what comes our way as a result.


    Sounds like you’ve been through quite a lot as well, it’s so difficult to make that final call to head down the path of a donor and even when you do, you’ll probably still question the decision every step of the way because that’s what we’re like with IVF no matter where it is, especially after failed cycles. If you do go down the donor path, you have your knowledge on your side from your experiences and it’ll be a lot smoother because there’s no egg pick up! I’ll admit, the conclusion of no more procedures for me was wonderful, I’ve had enough of them!!

    Please let me know if you have any more questions

    Ves x
    Last edited by Ves; 13-03-2020 at 00:40. Reason: add info

  7. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unicorn78 View Post
    Thank you @Ves, I'm actually feeling ok. I'm trying to coordinate a skype consult with IVF Spain for 2 weeks time and looking forward to getting the ball rolling. Hopefully some young eggs will be the answer for us!

    Can I please ask you one thing - my husband and I are both quite fair skinned and we and all of our family members have blue or green eyes. My husband is a little bit concerned about whether they will match us with someone who has the same colouring or whether we'll end up with an olive skinned brown eyed baby! Do you feel like your donor was a good match?

    That’s fantastic news you’re booked in for aSkype and I’m so glad to hear you’re feeling okay.

    I totally get the concern – my husband and I are exactly the same – fair hair, skin and eyes! Our little boy has fair skin,blue eyes and my husband’s hair colour. People say all the time “he looks so much like his mummy!”. I have blue eyes and his eyes are almost exactly the same as mine. Spain has mostly fair and tan skinned people as far as I seen and quite a lot of them have blue / green eyes. They’re absolutely gorgeous people!!

    IVF Spain are one of the unique clinics in the world that are obligated by Spanish law to match your donor to you, they must look like you and they are audited on this. It’s amazing.

    IVF Spain will ask you what the most important things are to you – such as hair and eye colour, skin, proven fertility, education and BMI.

    Hope this helps and good luck when you talk to them! Let me know if you have any other questions.

    Ves x
    Last edited by Ves; 13-11-2018 at 23:20. Reason: Remove error

  8. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chilla View Post
    Really appreciate you providing this review. It is great to hear your success! It gives me hope. Do you know if they have an age limit?
    Hello! I'm not sure if they have an age limit.... have you had a chance to look over their website or send them an email? I think my first contact with them was via their website sending them a message via the 'contact us'. Sorry I can't be of much help on this.

  9. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unicorn78 View Post
    Thank you @Ves, I'm actually feeling ok. I'm trying to coordinate a skype consult with IVF Spain for 2 weeks time and looking forward to getting the ball rolling. Hopefully some young eggs will be the answer for us!

    Can I please ask you one thing - my husband and I are both quite fair skinned and we and all of our family members have blue or green eyes. My husband is a little bit concerned about whether they will match us with someone who has the same colouring or whether we'll end up with an olive skinned brown eyed baby! Do you feel like your donor was a good match?

    @Unicorn78

    How did you skype consult go? I've had you in my thoughts and I hope it went well


  10. #19
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    @Ves, thank you for thinking of me! The skype consult went well, thank you. I'm ready to go but my husband needs a bit more time to get his head around it! Our main issue is putting all our trust in the clinic to find a suitable donor and not getting any information about them. I understand why, but it's a big leap of faith for us.

  11. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unicorn78 View Post
    @Ves, thank you for thinking of me! The skype consult went well, thank you. I'm ready to go but my husband needs a bit more time to get his head around it! Our main issue is putting all our trust in the clinic to find a suitable donor and not getting any information about them. I understand why, but it's a big leap of faith for us.

    I totally get that, we were exactly the same for quite some time.

    Glad to hear the consult went well )


 

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