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  1. #1
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    Default Help me with pro and con list

    Please help me add to the list for each option. Normally I have a great plan of when and how I want to do things. I'm stuck with this m some help as I'm tunnel visioned.

    Background-
    currently have 2 and 4 year old. Almost exactly 2 year gap.

    Dd1 is kindy 2018 prep 2019
    Dd2 kindy 2020 prep 2021

    My current ( promotion) role ends may 2018 ( then I go back to other role- have been told though that I'm on path for leadership so most likely won't go back )

    Option 1 ttc end 2018 for mid 2019

    Option 2 ttc end of 2019 for mid 2020

    Wwyd

  2. #2
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    I'd TTC end 2018 as I prefer short gaps. Plus you never know how long it will take as we get older pregnancies/falling pregnant can be different experiences.

    What makes you want to wait longer?

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    Option 1

    ETA you don't know how long it will take plus I've found that as the kids get older, the age gap between your oldest and youngest change can impact on everything. eg having to drag a baby or toddler to the oldest child's activities.. Trying to convince a tween they would love to see a movie pitched towards the preschool set. etc
    Last edited by SSecret Squirrel; 11-09-2017 at 07:47.

  4. #4
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    Money :
    2018
    Pro - after born can then just focus on savings and no disruptions
    Con- less time to save. Previous mat leave wipes savings

    2019
    Pro - more time to save, mortgage will be less
    Con- another disruption to finance / delay

    School / childcare
    2018
    Pro - child3 will be in daycare with dd2 for a year before she starts school, so easier transition

    Con -will have child halfway through dd1 first year of school. Will have two in daycare for 1 year before dd2 starts school

    2019
    Pro- only 1 in daycare at a time, I'll be on maternity leave for start of dd2 first year of school .

    Con- harder transition for child3 into school

    Career :
    2018
    Pro - get it out of way then can focus on my return
    Con- leaving just as I'm taking off

    2019
    Pro longer time to establish and secure position
    Con- break in career when momentum is happening

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    I'm a fan of smaller age gaps. Harder in the early years, but easier to navigate family activities once they're older. The early years go so fast, I personally prefer the ease of the smaller gap for the older years.

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    I say go for it early. Both options seem to have the same pros/cons. Especially money and career wise, can't see a huge difference.

    What matters is that you'll be in your promotion by the time you announce your pregnancy.
    1 year is plenty to make your mark

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    I'm just worried as it's often secondments and you don't own roles

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    I would go with option 2 solely based on that on some days both older kids would be at school and you can have more time with bub and to rest. And the bit about money and saving would be a cherry on top, also the career, I'm not sure but my thinking is to get in before maternity leave rather than leave before you can progress.

  10. #9
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    Default Help me with pro and con list

    Personally I would take the career out of the equation. I've done that before, been promised a promotion, and then comes a restructure... no more money available for said promotion but still the next person to get one etc. In the end I got my promotion by changing employer and I was 4 mth pregnant when starting into my new job.
    Not ideal! But corporate life is too instable to decide your family future around it IMO.
    Especially with secondments and all...

    But at the end of the day it also depends with how far you are comfortable pushing it back, max gap with your youngest and your own age. Is TTC end of 2019 the latest you'd entertain?

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