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  1. #1
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    Default Struggling with breastfeeding/babies sleep

    Hi ladies
    Just looking for some advice. My dd is 8 weeks old. She is still feeding (breastfeeding) every two hours and just barely cat napping inbetween. 45 minutes at most. I usually feed her to asleep as she doesn't settle very well or at all any other way. And usually as soon as I feed her she falls asleep and I actually cant wake her.. even enough to do the other side.. meaning we end up in a cycle of catnap and snack. And I'm soooo exhausted.
    I have a few question.
    1: for those that feed to sleep with young babies did you continue this moving forward? If yes how long and how did you stop?
    2: does any one have advice how to help this i have seen a lactation consultant. And I'm looking at doing a sleep day soon.
    3 how do i help her move through sleep cycles?

    I guess the thing is i am absolutely exhausted from feeding every 1.5 hours. And getting very sick of it I'm almost starting to resent these times and it makes me want to give up bf. The bonus is she sleeps well at night.
    But just wondering what sleep patterns change as they move into third month. And how do i set up a good routine?
    Any help would be appreciated!

  2. #2
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    Hi hun

    My DD is very much the same and the same age.

    Have you tried feeding on one side, then undressing and changing her to wake her up and then feeding her on the other side?

    It seems from everything I have read that it is a version of normal for this age.

    Have you had her checked for any tongue or lip ties at all, as if she does have one, it can be exhausting her to feed efficiently.

    One thing I have found with night times, is to have a loose routine to associate the transition from day to night. We do bath, feed, dim all lights, and have the house closed up for night and a quite relaxed atmosphere (we still have the tv on, but quieter) and then she may have a few nappy changes and feeds before she eventually falls asleep for her first sleep of the night. We always wrap her or have her in her zip up swaddle for bed, as this helps her associate that its time to sleep.

  3. #3
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    My dd was the same. But I used to feed her when she woke and then again when she went to sleep because she didn't feed for long enough. It didn't continue. Once I moved her onto formula at approximately 7 months she did have a bottle before bed but that was it.

    Ds was completely different, he only feeds to sleep if a nighttime otherwise he has a bottle when he wakes and goes to sleep without it. He's always been that way. I honestly think it depends on bub.

    Give her a chance to settle in... you usually won't see any type of routine or longer sleeping until at least 12 weeks. And they will tell you their routine both my kids have!

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    I'm sorry to say this sounds fairly normal for that age. Exhausting but normal.
    DD did 45 min-1hr sleeps until she dropped to 2 sleeps a day (about 10 months I think?), DS is 7 months and does 3 x 45 min-1hr sleeps a day. I feed to sleep for day sleeps, but not at night.
    We went through a horrendous patch with DS from 4-5 months and ended up doing some sleep training for night sleep, which I think has helped his day sleeps indirectly.
    It's much better when they start to do a decent chunk of sleep at night time.
    Perhaps try to focus on how you can get more rest and forget about routine until Bub is about 3-4 months?
    On weekends I feed DS to sleep about midday, give DH the baby monitor and go to bed. DH is in charge until DS needs his next feed. This allows me to have a rest (DD still naps).
    Also when DS was new I would go to bed at 7pm, DH would give an expressed bottle at his first wake up then resettle and I would get up for the next feed. This allowed me to get a solid 6 hours and it was heavenly.
    Hang in there! Just try to do the same thing every bedtime eg: wrap, white noise and hopefully things will improve when Bub gets a bit bigger.

  5. #5
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    It's not unusual behavior. My 1st fed every 2hrs & catnapped but slept for decent stretches at night, thankfully.

    My second would still feed all day & wakes multiple times a night at 1.

    I can't give you meaningful advice as I'm the 'be responsive & meet their needs' type, especially at 8 weeks.

    Have you read about the 4th trimester? Knowing your not alone & it's in the range of normal (if there's no issues - reflux etc) might be of some comfort?

    But at the end of the day, your health is paramount, so if you are struggling, take action. So good on you for reaching out.

    There are some techniques for helping them move into the next sleep cycle if you google it, just not sure if it's applicable at her age.

    All the best!

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    Quote Originally Posted by YeahYeahYeah View Post

    I can't give you meaningful advice as I'm the 'be responsive & meet their needs' type, especially at 8 weeks.

    Have you read about the 4th trimester? Knowing your not alone & it's in the range of normal (if there's no issues - reflux etc) might be of some comfort?
    !
    I am very much about this as well I am very responsive to her. And get angry when people say i should let her cry.

    She does thankfully sleep well at night usually 11-6am. Sometimes 1 wake up at 3.

    I was just wondering if as a first time mum i was missing something that I should be doing that could help this as the child health nurse, mentioned that she should be feeding 3-4 hourly.
    Although I since sort other help as I was very up set at how i was treated by the health nurse.


    Thanks for the advice.

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    I think baby may be hungry...have you tried formula?

    I breastfeeding fed but after 1 week gave baby formula at might baby slept through and more settled.

    I suggest mix feeding if you haven't tried it....

    I had to wake my baby first 2 weeks as midwife said to but after 2 weeks they said baby looked okay and was sleeping well

    Butterfly
    X

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    Quote Originally Posted by twentysomething View Post
    I am very much about this as well I am very responsive to her. And get angry when people say i should let her cry.

    She does thankfully sleep well at night usually 11-6am. Sometimes 1 wake up at 3.

    I was just wondering if as a first time mum i was missing something that I should be doing that could help this as the child health nurse, mentioned that she should be feeding 3-4 hourly.
    Although I since sort other help as I was very up set at how i was treated by the health nurse.


    Thanks for the advice.
    That advice is outdated and downright dangerous. It is perfectly normal for breastfed newborns to feed every 2 hours. There was no way I could have stretched mine out to 4 hours.

    As exhausting as it is, it sounds to me like you are doing well. Mine only ever fed on one side. I found I could them to sleep better and longer in the sling.

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  10. #9
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    OP, I think you'll find that the main reason bubby is feeding so frequently during the day is because she's sleeping so well at night. If she is having a 7hr stretch with the occasional 1 wake up, then she will be hungrier through the day. Most babies will typically feed 6-12 times a day. Sometimes they're evenly spaced, sometimes they're not. There are all sorts of reasons babies will want to feed all the time. To be honest, I don't think there is a problem with this at all. Except of course your exhaustion. I would maybe consider wearing baby during the day to see if that helps. You may find though that if she's not feeding as much during the day that she starts waking up more overnight.

    Also, find a child health nurse whose values align with yours. Telling a new mum that her baby *should* be feeding 3-4hrly is helpful to no one and will only cause more stress, anxiety and worry when in fact your baby is actually doing normal things.

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  12. #10
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    Omg congrats Hun! Did I miss this or did I just forget due to sleep deprivision? Lol.

    My DD2 has only ever had 1 side per feed. She was falling asleep every feed as she had tongue and lip ties.


 

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