+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 15
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2015
    Posts
    2,825
    Thanks
    2,914
    Thanked
    2,679
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts

    Default Embrace

    Just watched this on foxtel today, wondering if anyone else has seen it? What were your thoughts?

    For those who haven't seen it, the basic overview is a look at how women of all different shapes and sizes seem to have body image issues, and looks at why that is, and how we can change it and learn to embrace our bodies.

    It really resonated with me as I feel like I've fallen into a pattern of hating my body. I felt like it let me down during pregnancy, then after my emergency c-section I ended up with a massive infection, septicaemia, and almost died, and now I'm left scarred and overweight. I feel like I've been at war with my own body, but this is the only body I've got, so I need to learn to love it and treat it with respect. I feel like every time I see someone on tv or in a magazine that I just can't measure up and it makes me feel so disheartened.

    Watching this film really made me shift my focus, from "I need to lose weight" to "I need to be healthy". And made me realise that my family doesn't care if my body is a bit softer or bigger in some places, they're just glad I'm here and want me to be happy.

    How is your body image? Does the media influence your body image? (**possible trigger**) Have you ever sacraficed your health for your weight?
    Last edited by Frankenmum; 08-05-2017 at 20:20.

  2. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Frankenmum For This Useful Post:

    frankie46  (09-05-2017),Wise Enough  (09-05-2017)

  3. #2
    SuperGranny's Avatar
    SuperGranny is offline Worlds best grandma! Winner 2012 - Most Helpful Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    sunshine coast qld
    Posts
    6,533
    Thanks
    5,300
    Thanked
    3,065
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I haven't seen the show, but i can understand the pressure on women to be some sort of 'perfect ten'. I must say, as I have gotten older, I have certainly reached a state of acceptance. Not that I think I don't have to take care of myself, but just " I am me and that is just fine". I have never sacrificed my health for my weight. I go to my gym everyday, and I eat mindfully 99% of the time. I have reached a stage where the media does not influence my 'body image' at all. I own my body image. marie.

  4. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to SuperGranny For This Useful Post:

    babyno1onboard  (09-05-2017),Frankenmum  (09-05-2017),frankie46  (09-05-2017),JR03  (10-05-2017),Wise Enough  (09-05-2017)

  5. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    2,236
    Thanks
    96
    Thanked
    2,064
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I am lucky that body image has never been a big deal for me. I've always bounced weight. Now I'm just fat. Not huge huge but enough to probably disgust a bunch of you all hah (~100kg) but I just don't overly care. I eat healthy most of the time. I cook from scratch, we don't get McDonalds or anything. I am reasonably active, but it's all kid/house related stuff. It's pretty rare for me to specifically exercise. I hate it and I have other priorities. I can still chuck on a pair of sneakers and have a decent game of footy with the kids without keeling over so I'm happy.

    The "nothing tastes as good as skinny feels" quote just simply doesn't apply to me. I would hate being skinny if it meant I could never enjoy a nice fatty steak for dinner, followed by some homemade, fullcream milk ice cream. I honestly feel on my deathbed, I won't regret not being skinny. I would, however, regret spending my days miserable to keep up an appearance that really meant nothing. Those that enjoy exercising and stuff, more power to them. If that's what they enjoy, go for it. I'm going to go do what I enjoy.

    My worth isn't based on how I look. My super skinny, well maintained neighbour is a complete and utter bish, with no respect for anything but herself and a marriage that's falling apart. But boy does she look nice .

    I am helpful, kind, giving, intelligent, funny, witty, clever and cute as hell. So who needs to be pretty, right?

  6. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Ahalfdozen For This Useful Post:

    babyno1onboard  (09-05-2017),Frankenmum  (09-05-2017),frankie46  (09-05-2017),Green Cheese  (09-05-2017),JustJaq  (09-05-2017),Redcorset  (09-05-2017)

  7. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2016
    Posts
    264
    Thanks
    135
    Thanked
    133
    Reviews
    0
    Loving some of these responses. I've got Embrace on the iQ but haven't watched it yet! I've been massively at war with my body image on and off over the years, suffering from eating disorders and body dysmorphia. Growing up my mum was obsessed with weight, and only had low fat products in the house. I was shamed if I asked for seconds, I would be told "I'm watching your figure", or "you be careful or you'll end up the size of a house". I remember this so vividly. I was probably 7 or 8 when she put me on a "diet".

    When I was 14 I lost a lot of weight due to illness. I felt like mum was so proud of me. She took me shopping for new clothes and started complimenting me instead of berating me.

    Needless to say my relationship with food and body image has been the biggest battle of my life. These past few years however, have been much better. Since having DD I've had a much greater acceptance and love for my body. I've gotten myself out of toxic relationships and built a really great life. I'm really happy with myself and who I am, and that trumps being skinny. I've weighed 10kg less than I do now and I was bloody miserable. Whilst I don't know if I'll ever look at my body and totally love what I see, I'd much rather this life - this life of happy times, ice cream in summer, fish & chips on the beach & tons of homemade pizza in winter - than a life where I'm ruled by what I do/don't eat. I can't imagine raising my daughter to believe her weight mattered. We only talk about food in terms of what tastes good and what is good for you.

    I can't wait to watch Embrace, I'm gonna need a ton of tissues I think! I cry every time the promo comes on It will be a tough but important watch for me.

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to frankie46 For This Useful Post:

    Frankenmum  (09-05-2017)

  9. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Posts
    1,566
    Thanks
    526
    Thanked
    520
    Reviews
    6
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I saw it at the movies last year and loved it! I'm overweight, and always have been. My mum has been on diets my entire life, she has yoyo'd the whole time and with three daughters I have no idea how none of us ended up with an eating disorder. The thoughts of is this going to make me fat rules her entire life, and going out for dinner with her is exhausting. As an example my 5 year old vomited at her house the other night, we had been out all day and she had eaten a tonne of junk so we put it down to that, my mum said within earshot 'my tummy used to get upset and make me vomit when I ate too much too, unfortunately I grew out of that'

    I love her dearly just the way she is, I wish we could take a photo without her looking at it and going oh I look terrible. I catch myself sometimes when I am trying on clothes or looking at photos thinking ergh I look so fat but I try really hard not to say it in front of my kids. I think oh yes I'm going to do this and that to get healthier for my family, hoping it will help with sleep and energy levels etc but I get too lazy. It's a fine balance with I want to be healthier without it being a focus on fat is ugly.

    I guess despite my weight I try to dress to my shape, I wish there was more available in plus size fashionable clothes without being so expensive but I use a few staples and go from there.

    I found the documentary very interesting but I must say beyond telling me what I already knew, that our society is super focused on weight, I can't remember any actions to take forward now.

  10. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Green Cheese For This Useful Post:

    Frankenmum  (09-05-2017),frankie46  (09-05-2017)

  11. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    11,779
    Thanks
    3,029
    Thanked
    3,308
    Reviews
    14
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week

    Default Embrace

    I watched most of it the other day, and whilst I'm okay with my post 4 babies body, and fortunately don't suffer with body loathing (as this film is highlighting etc) I thought it was a really insightful doco.
    I am so very mindful of how I speak around my girls and also how they see me. As far as they're concerned, their Mum thinks her body's amazing because it helped make them!

    I must admit it was very hard to see the girl with the Anorexia, she was absolutely emaciated and so mentally unwell, very confronting stuff.

    I did have a giggle when Taryn was in the Plastic Surgeon's office and how absurd he was sounding once he got past her breasts and onto her face etc, it was so ludicrous and Taryn's facial expressions were brilliant!

  12. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Mod-Uniquey For This Useful Post:

    Frankenmum  (09-05-2017),frankie46  (09-05-2017)

  13. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Posts
    714
    Thanks
    725
    Thanked
    287
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I haven't heard of it, but I really think I need to watch it! My battle with body issues has been with me since early teens, and I'm now 37. Not to place blame, but I watched my mum go on every diet know to man, religiously weigh herself and stand in-front of the mirror criticizing her figure and I followed into the same pattern. From 12 years old mum and I ate the low fat pasta meal while Dad and brother ate steak and chips. Mum was in her late 50's before she took on the "who cares" attitude (much like you *Ahalfdozen and I admire your attitude). There really is so much more to us than how much fat hangs off our butt or thighs. I'm proud of my work, my personal qualities such as empathy, resilience, kindness, integrity, my family, etc, etc. I can hold a conversation and be interested in other people. I know a few skinny girls who place much more importance on how they eat and how much they exercise and I find their conversations are boring and self-centered. Two people I used to be close with became so boring to me because their conversation only seem to revolve around how they looked. I'd much rather talk about sooo many other topics. Anyway, I'm rambling a bit here, but I do feel in the last couple of years I'm more at peace with being 10kg heavier than my "prime". In my mid 20's I was a size 10 and worked hard to exercise and eat well. While I never made it my sole focus in life, my "inside voice" always compares myself to other women. Are my thighs/stomach/arms bigger or smaller. How much more do I weigh than this time or that age etc...It's so shallow and I never let it affect my relationship with that person but I constantly compare myself and I'm never happy. Only very recently, I've started eating better for my health, rather than for weight loss, and I'm finding I can eat much better without all the misery of a diet. Because I want to be healthy and feel good again. I really admire those who put health first (and can hold a decent, interesting conversation!!)

  14. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Redcorset For This Useful Post:

    Frankenmum  (09-05-2017),frankie46  (09-05-2017)

  15. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2014
    Location
    Roleystone
    Posts
    1,879
    Thanks
    2,596
    Thanked
    2,440
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I haven't seen the show - might have to have a look. I am skinny, always have been, people think I must be so happy with the way I look and tell me so all the time. The truth of it is, the only time I was ok with my body was when I was pregnant. The feeling that I didn't need to obsess over how flat my tummy was, was the most liberating feeling in the world.

    I've suffered eating disorders and I look back at some of the photos and think 'holy moly, my arms are like twigs!' but I didn't think that then. When I was 32 I weighed 42kgs and was always trying to figure out how to slim my hips that little bit more.

    Now, after having my daughter 5 months ago, I'm unhappy with my body again. I promised myself I wouldn't stress about it, but here I am again, telling myself every day I have to lose the last 5kgs to get back to where I was pre-pregnancy. No matter how much my DH tries to convince me he thinks I look great

    It seems a common theme here that mums have sowed the seed for some of us to dislike our bodies. Mine was/is the same. She is very thin herself and always made comments to me growing up about how I needed to look after my figure. At one stage I did put some weight on when I was in my 20's (I weighed a whole 52kgs ) and she lectured me everytime she saw me about it. I've spoken to her about it many times and she says she understands why what she has said is wrong....but then can't help tut-tutting when we walk past someone in the street who is overweight. She is such a kind person in all other aspects so it drives me absolutely crazy when she does it. She has always told me her mum gave her all the same advice.

    So my main concern now is....how do I make sure I don't do the same thing to my daughter? I've told my mum exactly what will happen if she does it to my daughter, but what if it's me?! Because although my mum will try and say the right things now, her actions speak loudest. If my daughter sees me weighing and measuring myself every day, throwing laxatives down my throat, eating all the snacks and getting upset over it, being ashamed of the way I look? Am I going to keep this ludicrous body hating theme going for more generations?

  16. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to HillDweller For This Useful Post:

    Frankenmum  (09-05-2017),Shoopuf  (09-05-2017)

  17. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    2,341
    Thanks
    2,234
    Thanked
    3,310
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    @HillDweller, I could have almost written your post word for word!!

    I've always been slim, but I don't think I can remember a time in my life when I didn't think I could do with being thinner. At one point in my late 20s I weighed 49kg, and I remember thinking then that it would be great if I could lose 4 more. I'm 167cm tall, and I wanted to weigh 45kg. Wtf was wrong with me??? I look at photos from that time and I look scarily thin. Like size-6-clothes-hanging-off-of-me thin. But I got all of this reinforcement from others about it (because prior I had had a little pot belly from too much takeout and an office job, and apparently that was just the worst thing in the world), so I think the constant reinforcement motivated me to want to lose more.

    I often feel guilty about eating certain things, which I think is really unhealthy. Guilt is not an emotion that should be tied to nutrition.

  18. #10
    Join Date
    Apr 2014
    Location
    Roleystone
    Posts
    1,879
    Thanks
    2,596
    Thanked
    2,440
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Shoopuf View Post
    @HillDweller, I could have almost written your post word for word!!

    I've always been slim, but I don't think I can remember a time in my life when I didn't think I could do with being thinner. At one point in my late 20s I weighed 49kg, and I remember thinking then that it would be great if I could lose 4 more. I'm 167cm tall, and I wanted to weigh 45kg. Wtf was wrong with me??? I look at photos from that time and I look scarily thin. Like size-6-clothes-hanging-off-of-me thin. But I got all of this reinforcement from others about it (because prior I had had a little pot belly from too much takeout and an office job, and apparently that was just the worst thing in the world), so I think the constant reinforcement motivated me to want to lose more.

    I often feel guilty about eating certain things, which I think is really unhealthy. Guilt is not an emotion that should be tied to nutrition.

    Absolutely, and I find it so difficult that I intellectually know that feeling guilt over food is so unhealthy...but my brain does it anyway. I also have a hugely addictive personality, so I get really addicted to food, so it becomes a ridiculous never ending cycle too. Sigh.

  19. The Following User Says Thank You to HillDweller For This Useful Post:

    Frankenmum  (09-05-2017)


 

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 0
    Last Post: 10-05-2010, 16:27
  2. Replies: 18
    Last Post: 09-02-2008, 09:04
  3. What helped you embrace your pregnancy?
    By babyella in forum Pregnancy & Birth General Chat
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 08-11-2007, 20:01
  4. 'Romeo & Juliet' fossils in eternal embrace
    By ~rambox~ in forum News & Current Affairs
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 12-02-2007, 21:47

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
FEATURED SUPPORTER
SoftmatsSoftmats specialises in safe, non-toxic, and durable play mats. The international Premium Dwingulerâ„¢ Play Mats and ...
REVIEWS
"Made bed time less anxious"
by Meld85
My Little Heart Whisbear - the Humming Bear reviews ›
"Wonderful natural Aussie made product!"
by Mrstwr
Baby U Goat Milk Moisturiser reviews ›
"Replaced good quality with cheap tight nappies"
by Kris
Coles Comfy Bots Nappies reviews ›