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  1. #1
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    Default Considering a termination

    I'm not sure where to post this type of question, couldn't find an exact match, so forgive me if it's in the wrong place.

    I haven't been on BH for a while. But I find myself unexpectedly pregnant with our fourth (!!!!) baby and we are not happy about it unfortunately. We were fully done with three children. We have multiple marriage issues, we are over stretched financially, emotionally and physically looking after our three kids. I cannot see how a fourth can bring anything but more struggles. So we are considering a termination. I'm about 5 weeks.

    I would appreciate hearing from anyone who has been through this, via pm or otherwise, who can tell me about the process. I am seeing my GP on Wednesday, and from what I've read it's going to cost a few hundred dollars. I'm scared, I'm nervous, and I don't know what the right decision is exactly. I just know I can't see myself caring for another baby, and going through another pregnancy with my current workload, both at home and at my job. 😞

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    Big hugs x
    I haven't been through it myself but supported my best friend while she went through the process at 6 weeks. She got a referral from a GP to a clinic. When you go to the appointment they give you a scan to date your pregnancy to make sure you are under 9 weeks. She was given 2 pills, one to take at the clinic and one to take at home a few hours later. She got a very heavy and painful period like bleeding. The people were very gentle and nice at the clinic. It does cost a few hundred dollars but I know my friend didn't pay the full price because she has a healthcare card.

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    Default Considering a termination

    big hugs, it's never an easy decision.

    i had one many years ago as a baby was just not right for me at the time. had a referral from a gp and my sister took me to the appointment. i was so out of my comfort zone and scared of something going wrong but it was fine. never once did i question my decision. to this day, i have no regrets. when you know, you just know.

    i had a surgical termination so was put to sleep and woke up after. i had no bleeding and no pain. it was like i'd never been pregnant. all my symptoms (nausea, sore boobs etc) just disappeared. it was a relief actually, i could mentally and psychologically move forward without messy or painful physical symptoms reminding me what i'd been through. as i'd had a surgical procedure, i was put on a dose of antibiotics to prevent any infection. i was told no sex for 4 or 6 weeks after, which i followed as i was terrified of getting further into issues i didn't need. i think i went back to the gp after that for a check up (all was fine) and went on the pill.

    whilst it's not an experience i think anyone looks back on fondly, it has its place and as i said, i've never regretted the decision. mostly i don't think about it.

    happy to chat further or pm me if you like.

    all the best with whatever decision you end up making xx

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    I had one when I was 21 we knew what our decision was as soon as I knew we were pregnant.

    I was petrified of having a d and c and was looking into the abortion pill.
    I went to a clinic- Mary stopes and was scanned for dating purposes and other things - spoken to by a councillor to make sure it was the right decision. I think it roughly cost $400

    I took a pill at the clinic to end it and another pill the next morning to clean it out. That day was awful my body went into shock - it was like full blown labour pains, blood everywhere, intense cramps, passing out, shaking and the list goes on and it when on for hours and hours. I thought I was going to die - I rang my mum to come and help me. The pain was the worst pain I've ever felt. The bleeding continued for around 10days.

    I went for a checkup a week later to check it was clear.

    I tell anyone not to take the abortion pill have a d and c. It's easier, cleaner and safer. There's so many horror stories about the pill.

    I have no doubts about our decision - it was the right one and I'm very pro choice !

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    Oh lovely, I haven't been on regularly for ages either and sometimes just lurk to check on people (in a non stalkerish way I promise) and I couldn't read this and not send you huge love.
    You have been through the wringer and only you know what is right for your family and yourself.
    Please be kind to yourself because you deserve it xxx

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    Quote Originally Posted by Reneeharry View Post
    I had one when I was 21 we knew what our decision was as soon as I knew we were pregnant.

    I was petrified of having a d and c and was looking into the abortion pill.
    I went to a clinic- Mary stopes and was scanned for dating purposes and other things - spoken to by a councillor to make sure it was the right decision. I think it roughly cost $400

    I took a pill at the clinic to end it and another pill the next morning to clean it out. That day was awful my body went into shock - it was like full blown labour pains, blood everywhere, intense cramps, passing out, shaking and the list goes on and it when on for hours and hours. I thought I was going to die - I rang my mum to come and help me. The pain was the worst pain I've ever felt. The bleeding continued for around 10days.

    I went for a checkup a week later to check it was clear.

    I tell anyone not to take the abortion pill have a d and c. It's easier, cleaner and safer. There's so many horror stories about the pill.

    I have no doubts about our decision - it was the right one and I'm very pro choice !
    that sounds intense. i was put off having a medical termination (when you take the pills) as i was working with a girl who'd had one and she said it was the worst thing ever. she'd also had a surgical termination and said the latter was way less traumatic. so based on her experience, i wanted a surgical. yes it's more invasive but i didn't want cramps and bleeding. that would've really distressed me i think.

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    I work in this field and can tell you that:
    The surgical option is not "easier/cleaner/safer".

    It not as simple to make a statement like that.

    They each have pros and cons depending on a large number of factors.

    The medical termination option is lower risk (safer) of something going wrong, mainly because there is no physical intervention inside you which has the risk of physically damaging you.

    In saying that, the medical option also has a higher risk of not being successful, but that is still pretty low.

    Medical is not painful for everyone, it's the same as a lot of other treatments. People react to things differently and the majority react to it quite mildly. (I'm not sure that's the word I wanted to use, but I couldn't find the right one for this situation).

    I hope you find an option that you and your family are comfortable with, I'm sure it's not an easy decision.

    Xxx

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    Huge hugs Bond. I'm so sorry you are going through this x

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    Default Considering a termination

    Quote Originally Posted by Lanabananah View Post
    I work in this field and can tell you that:
    The surgical option is not "easier/cleaner/safer".

    It not as simple to make a statement like that.

    They each have pros and cons depending on a large number of factors.

    The medical termination option is lower risk (safer) of something going wrong, mainly because there is no physical intervention inside you which has the risk of physically damaging you.

    In saying that, the medical option also has a higher risk of not being successful, but that is still pretty low.

    Medical is not painful for everyone, it's the same as a lot of other treatments. People react to things differently and the majority react to it quite mildly. (I'm not sure that's the word I wanted to use, but I couldn't find the right one for this situation).

    I hope you find an option that you and your family are comfortable with, I'm sure it's not an easy decision.

    Xxx
    i didn't mean to imply one option was "easier" than the other. and i'm not a medical professional so certainly can't comment on the safety of one procedure over the other. i was merely commenting on my experience.
    Last edited by turquoisecoast; 01-05-2017 at 08:53.


 

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