+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 4 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 39
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Posts
    2,952
    Thanks
    1,765
    Thanked
    1,345
    Reviews
    6
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts

    Default In Shock

    Hi Hubbers,
    I used to frequent these threads a lot with my first pregnancy but haven't been on in a few years.

    I left a toxic relationship (husband) just over 2 years ago and have recently started seeing a wonderful man. It's only been about 6 weeks.

    This week I just haven't been right so POAS this morning and got two faint positives (different brands).

    We have been careful except for one time......
    I am really in shock. I don't know what to do.
    I haven't told him yet (literally POAS an hour ago). I've decided I won't tell him yet, I'll wait at least until my missed period (due on Easter Monday).

    He and I had talked about having a baby in the future but 6 weeks in wasn't the plan....
    I'm totally overwhelmed.

    I'm turning 40 this year so in one mind think this could be my last chance to give my 3 yr old a sibling but at the same time think I hardly know this man, is it wise to have a baby with him.

    I think I'd be right to do it alone in the practicalities if he wasn't interested (not that I think he would but you never know right?) but then stress about financial issues. I struggle as it is keeping me and my 3 yr old afloat.

    It only early days I'm literally 3 weeks pregnant so anything could happen but can't stop my mind racing. EDD would be Christmas Day....

    Not really sure why I'm posting all this, I don't really have a question to ask per se, just needed to get it out.

    I wonder if it's selfish of me to want to have it knowing financially my daughter will have less but then think the joys of a sibling far out way any financial stuff....

    Sorry for the rant, my mind is just going a million miles an hour!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    12,027
    Thanks
    7,859
    Thanked
    6,844
    Reviews
    13
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 29/5/15Busiest Member of the WeekBusiest Member of the Week100 Posts in a week
    Welcome back! I remember you. Glad to hear you left and found a great new man. Congrats and I hope it turns out as you want it to.

    If it were me I'd continue the pregnancy, hope my man and I could do it together but still be happy with my decision even if things didn't quite work out between us.

    Hopefully we keep seeing you around xx

  3. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Mamasupial For This Useful Post:

    mckel  (14-04-2017),SpecialK  (14-04-2017)

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Posts
    2,952
    Thanks
    1,765
    Thanked
    1,345
    Reviews
    6
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Hi @Mamasupial, thanks for the kind message, I remember you too.
    I'm pretty much of the mindset as you but just worry about $$.

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    273
    Thanks
    84
    Thanked
    73
    Reviews
    0
    I remember you also. Your little one is a month older then mine. I've only recently rejoined as I'm due again next month.

    I hope it all work out and you have the outcome you want. I love these forums for just being able to say what we can't say out loud in the real world.

    Try not to stress about $$$ (I know it's hard not to). Focus on the good things that will result. More to love, sibling for you DD and having an opportunity that may not come along again xox

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to JoJo1stbub For This Useful Post:

    SpecialK  (14-04-2017)

  7. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Posts
    5,339
    Thanks
    5,293
    Thanked
    5,092
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    I remember you special K. No advice, just hugs to help you through it all. X

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to HollyGolightly81 For This Useful Post:

    SpecialK  (14-04-2017)

  9. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Mackay
    Posts
    6,789
    Thanks
    876
    Thanked
    2,819
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Not an ideal situation being only 6 weeks into a new relationship but it's happened now.

    In regards to the $$ side of things, somehow we as parents always make it work. It's like a super power we get when we become parents! Your daughter may have less material things but when she is grown do you think that will matter to her? Chances are nope- she will remember the fun she had and memories made with her sibling.

    Best of luck SpecialK, you will work it all out.

  10. The Following User Says Thank You to SheWarrior For This Useful Post:

    SpecialK  (14-04-2017)

  11. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Posts
    5,125
    Thanks
    2,310
    Thanked
    2,920
    Reviews
    6
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I remember you too. No advice but I do hope the new Mr is supportive.

  12. The Following User Says Thank You to amyd For This Useful Post:

    SpecialK  (14-04-2017)

  13. #8
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    11,104
    Thanks
    3,586
    Thanked
    6,710
    Reviews
    2
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Hey

    Sounds to me like you're already erring on the side of keeping this little blessing.

    Whilst the situation isn't ideal (new relationship, financial concerns), this could very well be the chance to give your daughter the sibling you thought she may not ever have.

    Whatever you decide, I wish you well. We are here if you need to talk it out

  14. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Mod-Degrassi For This Useful Post:

    HollyGolightly81  (14-04-2017),Mod-Uniquey  (14-04-2017),SheWarrior  (14-04-2017),SpecialK  (14-04-2017),SSecret Squirrel  (14-04-2017),TheGooch  (14-04-2017)

  15. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    2,265
    Thanks
    3,947
    Thanked
    2,320
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts

    Default In Shock

    I remember you.
    I was in a similar position at 40 too, after weeks of torture and worry I thought maybe this is meant to be, I believe it was.
    Plenty of hard times but DD is now 5 and I never had a regret from the moment they placed her on my chest.
    It's an entirely personal decision, whatever you decide to do will be the right thing to do.
    Hope you stick around xxx

  16. The Following User Says Thank You to Mokeybear For This Useful Post:

    SpecialK  (14-04-2017)

  17. #10
    Join Date
    Oct 2016
    Posts
    603
    Thanks
    431
    Thanked
    427
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I'd go for it. Some things are meant to be. If you were in your 20's or 30's I'd say you have plenty of time, but being 40, I'd take the opportunity to have a sibling for your 3 year old. Worst case scenario it doesnt work out, best case scenario you have a new family and it was all fate. But I'm a serial optimist. I got pregnant 4 months in to my relationship and we've now been together for 16 years.

  18. The Following User Says Thank You to Rachel3072 For This Useful Post:

    SpecialK  (14-04-2017)


 

Similar Threads

  1. Shock!!!
    By proud_mama in forum Pregnancy & Birth General Chat
    Replies: 32
    Last Post: 07-06-2007, 20:54
  2. I'm in shock ...
    By somedaysoon in forum General Chat
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 14-01-2006, 16:47
  3. Shocked
    By My3kids in forum General Chat
    Replies: 29
    Last Post: 06-01-2006, 12:52
  4. Shocking week
    By draught in forum General Child Health Issues
    Replies: 19
    Last Post: 23-12-2005, 20:17
  5. OMG I'm in shock
    By whatwasithinking in forum General Chat
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 13-12-2005, 11:27

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
FEATURED SUPPORTER
Baby SensoryBaby Sensory is the only baby programme that offers a complete approach to learning & development. Our classes ...
REVIEWS
"Made bed time less anxious"
by Meld85
My Little Heart Whisbear - the Humming Bear reviews ›
"Wonderful natural Aussie made product!"
by Mrstwr
Baby U Goat Milk Moisturiser reviews ›
"Replaced good quality with cheap tight nappies"
by Kris
Coles Comfy Bots Nappies reviews ›