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  1. #21
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    help your wife. my husband gave up weekend sleep ins when i was on mat leave so that i could have a sleep in (after being on night duty sunday - thursday nights). he'd also get up during the night on weekends and give ds expressed milk or formula so i could have unbroken sleep at least one night a week.

    your wife is taking care of your boys all day whilst you're doing your butcher work. why does your job finish once you get home, but hers doesn't? is it because her job is based in the home? therefore her hours should be 24/7? because nobody should work 24/7.

    we all know going out to work is easier than being home with the kids. i'm back 3 days a week now and my work days are easier than my days at home with ds.

    you mention you work a 70 hour week. what hours does your wife put in with the boys? my guesstimate is well in excess of 70 hours per week.

    stop being difficult and help her. these early years won't last forever but the impact on your marriage will.

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  3. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by hakuna matata View Post
    Help your wife. My husband does 12 hour shifts and has never once questioned getting up in the night or giving me a sleep in.
    This! She's working as much as you

    My DH works 12 hours plus and we share getting up

  4. #23
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    I worked 12 hour nightshifts on my feet whilst 38 weeks pregnant because it was easier than staying home with a toddler.

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  6. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wise Enough View Post
    I worked 12 hour nightshifts on my feet whilst 38 weeks pregnant because it was easier than staying home with a toddler.
    at least you can sit down with a cup of coffee or tea and go to the toilet without being interrupted by a small tornado!

  7. #25
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    My husband and i have 3 children (7, 3, 1). I breastfed all my children so never asked for help with night wakings. I havent slept through the night in literally years. My husband is a tradie who works fairly long hours in a physical job. But because he goes to bed at night and still gets a decent sleep (he does wake to our older 2 but they are easy), i get every single sleep in on weekends. He hasnt complained about not having a sleep in for 3 years because he knows he gets more sleep than me and that would be bloody rude of him.

    Late last year i went back to work after taking maternity leave. I now work 3 days a week. My work days are definitely easier and more 'relaxing' than my home days. Theres no competition there.

    You need to remember that your wife is working bl00dy hard right now. She's not paid for it, but its still a mammoth workload. Expecting her to survive every night off broken sleep and never getting a sleep in is just cruel. She needs a break too.

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  9. #26
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    One of you get a sleep in the other gets an arvo nap.

    I was/am a stay at home mum so i did the majority of night wakings except for the rare hellish nights where it was 1 in all in.

  10. #27
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    Help out every chance you get. Spend time with your eldest child so your wife isnt dealimg with both kids at once as well as help with some tidying.

  11. #28
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    You work 12 hour shifts. Your wife works 24/7.

  12. #29
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    My husband works 16 hours days, 5 days a week.

    During the week I do all the day and night stuff.
    At the weekend, we share it.

    It has taken a lot to get him to do this. The person that stays home with the child is on ALL the time. They do not get breaks. IF bub sleeps during the day they are cleaning/tidying/cooking/organising. It is ENDLESS.
    To do that all day everyday and then have to be 'on' overnight too is frickin' ridiculous.

    You're tired? So is she.
    Share the load.
    There are no sleep ins with kids. Get rid of that mindset.
    There is opportunity for each parent to have 'me time' and if that involves sleep cool.

  13. #30
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    My opinion will probably not be popular.
    I'm a working mum of 4 young children (aged 1 - 7). I work 3 days, do all school and kindy drop offs and pick ups, do all the house work, all night wake ups, all baths, all nappy changes, all bag packing, lunch making etc. While I do have a paid job, it's not significant pay wise in comparison to my husband, nor is it as physical or tiring, so I feel like most of the kids stuff is my job and I'm happy to do it.
    The only thing I think you're being unreasonable about is your 9am sleep in. Nobody needs a 9am sleep in, and it certainly wouldn't hurt you to let your wife have the sunday sleep in on occassion. I think that's a bit much.
    I don't really get the whole as the stay at home parent you're working 24/7 thing. I hate my work days, they are so much more stressful than my home days (mostly because I have to do all the kid stuff on either end though, not the actual day at work which is cruisy as hell), but I LOVE my home days and I definitely don't spend the whole day working. Hanging with my kids isn't always work, they're great company and good fun
    Last edited by CazHazKidz; 11-04-2017 at 09:19.

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