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  1. #1
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    Default Do u take it personally? Kids friends..

    Am I being silly?
    My son is 4 and in school now and it hurts me when a kid doesn't like him..
    I don't mean sometimes.. but my son likes a boy but this boy really can't stand my son. It hurts my heart for my son..
    The boy doesn't want to come over for a play when my son keeps asking him.. the mum told me my son was mean to him some how.. but doesn't know how so i don't know! Why wold my son want to be friends with him and mean to him at same time..?

    Anyway I take it all to heart and felt quite down now. Anyone else like this?

  2. #2
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    I've been on the other side of this when a child has been drawn to my son but my son hasn't taken an interest in him. The mother pushed playdates which ds went to but then refused to go to. Ds talks to this boy at school when he has to and is polite but just isn't a child he is into.
    I get it would be difficult for you but you can't force the issue. Your boy will make other friends.

  3. #3
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    Default Do u take it personally? Kids friends..

    Nope don't take it personally. I've learnt to step back and realise some kids just don't click. One of my besties has a son the same age as mine and we assumed they would be besties too but they just don't get on well and each have their own group of friends and others that they gel with a lot more. Not personal x
    Having said that I'd be keeping an eye on how your child plays just incase there is something you can help him with if other kids don't seem to want to play with him. Like I said it's probably just a once off with 2 kids that don't click

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    My dd is only 21 months I don't take it personally when other kids aren't into her but like you OP my heart does break a bit for her I just want her to be happy and liked and not rejected.
    Not quite sure how to deal with it aside from explaining to her when she's older that she won't 'like' everyone and not everyone will like her but the important thing is not to let it get you down, find someone else to play with who wants to be around you and be polite even if you don't want to be best buddies with someone.

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    School politics is hard ! Don't push it .. he will make friends ... kids will be friends with who they want

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    I very much do but I really shouldn't! My child has the added bonus of ASD so has no idea how to interact with other children. Breaks my heart when she's standing on the slide shouting for her 'friends' who pretty much have no idea she exists

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    Its hard. I have a 4yo but have not really had this issue.

    I think in this situation I would be teaching/telling my child that you do not have to like or be friends with everyone but treat them nicely and with respect. On the other hand not everyone wants to be friends. And you need to respect that too but also treat them nicely.

    It will hurt - of course if someone does not like you it hurts but as adults we don't like everyone.

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    Yes I have this issue. My DD is 5 and just started prep. In day care and kinder the girls were cliquey and she was on the outter. She had no close friends and wanted desperately to be friends with them. If someone was away she was occasionally allowed to play with them.

    I was happy to leave those girls behind when she started school. But she's struggling there too. It's like they can sense her neediness.

    I sent her to school with a ball to help her find people to play with. She's in a prep/1 composite and 1 of the grade 1 girls loved it and likes to play with it. But takes the ball and doesn't play with my DD. apparently they are "secret friends" . I made the rule that if DD takes the ball to school she plays with it, others can't take it and not play with her. This rule has caused her anxiety and she's desperate to give the grade 1 girl the ball to play with.

    I have no idea how to help my DD make friends.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wise Enough View Post
    Yes I have this issue. My DD is 5 and just started prep. In day care and kinder the girls were cliquey and she was on the outter. She had no close friends and wanted desperately to be friends with them. If someone was away she was occasionally allowed to play with them.

    I was happy to leave those girls behind when she started school. But she's struggling there too. It's like they can sense her neediness.

    I sent her to school with a ball to help her find people to play with. She's in a prep/1 composite and 1 of the grade 1 girls loved it and likes to play with it. But takes the ball and doesn't play with my DD. apparently they are "secret friends" . I made the rule that if DD takes the ball to school she plays with it, others can't take it and not play with her. This rule has caused her anxiety and she's desperate to give the grade 1 girl the ball to play with.

    I have no idea how to help my DD make friends.
    Have you talked to the teacher? They may be able to talk particular children about including her in games.

  10. #10
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    Yes I have. I think she made an effort for the day to include her but after that left it again


 

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