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  1. #161
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    Default The off load IVF page

    Sorry to hear lillym. I know you were moving on mentally before your last stim but it still hurts.
    @Chocolaterain I used to have a friend like that. Said I didn't want it enough or I wouldn't "quit". I tried to rationalise it by saying that suppose I decided to put 10k on horse 5 in the Melbourne Cup. I said I had a 1 in 24 chance of it winning and there was no point putting all that money down on crap odds. All she said was that I am anti horse racing and didn't bet so I wouldn't do that. She just didn't get it. Mind you I had told 3 friends (her being one) the first time I was pregnant and then I texted them after a scan at 11 weeks that showed I had had a missed miscarriage. I said in my text I couldn't speak and not to call me. Two of them texted back that it was feckin unfair and if I needed a shoulder to cry on they would come around. She texted back with "soz about your mc" I started distancing myself but when she is in the same circle of friends she is hard to avoid. I am glad you didn't waste your cocktail on your friend.

  2. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to calypso75 For This Useful Post:

    Billie2  (30-04-2017),Caesardust  (03-05-2017),Charlie74  (30-04-2017),Chocolate Rain  (02-05-2017),LillyM  (30-04-2017)

  3. #162
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    Quote Originally Posted by LillyM View Post
    Hey @Sariele, plz feel free to share away
    Thanks hun, I'll come back later when I've got time to write.

  4. #163
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    Good morning @calypso75 how are you this morning?

  5. #164
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    Good morning @calypso75 how are you this morning?

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  7. #165
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    @Chocolaterain that is horrible.

    Unfortunately some woman are rude.

    I had a close friend say to me in November all it is is boo hoo with you after an ivf cycle.

    So needless to say I'm lost at how I am suppose to feel.

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  9. #166
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    @cag14 thats unacceptable. Makes a fire in my belly burn. People who lack empathy are narcissistic and self absorbed. They dont have the capabilities or intelligence to understand or support women like us, therefore we are better off without them in our lives. They also tend to be people who judge and have a superior opinion of themselves and dont have the capacity to cope with what we go through.

    Basically they are weak as p*ss.

    We need to share our one-liner responses on here for these type of people and comments. We need to stand up for ourselves to the "two year gap" clan who dont understand us. Most do, Im not writing everyone off. Its the minority that are safe and naive. I have found almost everyone supported us once we opened up. The ones that were unacceptable, I pitied. At under 40 I was told I was too old by a neighbour. A neighbour that was once too drunk and full of valium to pick her 3 kids up from daycare and after school care. It was almost 6pm and her husband came home screaming at her that everyone was trying to call her. She is bottom of the barrel and might I add a well educated and employed woman in a very large wealthy home.

    Billie is on a rant !!

    Sorry!!

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  11. #167
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    Okay then, my story for those who want to read (this is LOOOONG, grab a cuppa):


    My hubby told me pretty much on our first date that he had a very low sperm count, that he'd tried IVF with his ex wife but she called it quits after only a couple of attempts. So I knew early on that if we got married, IVF was an almost-certainty. But I was confident that I was super fertile like my mum was. I had no problems at all with my cycles, hormones, periods, nothing. I was slim, fit and healthy, had never touched cigarettes or drugs at all, etc. etc. All my pre-IVF tests were normal.


    TTC #1...


    Cycle #1:
    DH still had 6 straws of sperm left from his previous attempts. As his count was now zero, we decided to use the frozen stuff instead of putting him through anything invasive. I got 6 eggs, all mature, and the lab managed to find 6 sperm that were "vaguely twitching" to use for ICSI. Got the call the next morning that only one egg had fertilised. I was devastated. HA! If only I knew everything that was to come...


    Because this clinic isn't the best, they insisted on transferring it on Day 1 as it was my only emby. I really wish now that I'd pushed them to grow it to Day 3, but I'm not sure if they would have let me. I'm sure they just wanted to get their transfer fee!


    Needless to say that it was a BFN.


    Cycle #2:
    We moved to Brisbane at the end of cycle 1, but I travelled back to Perth and stayed with my parents to give it one more go with the frozen sperm. This time I got 10 eggs, but only 6 were mature. Then before I'd even left the hospital, I got a call from the lab to say they'd thawed all 5 of the remaining straws of sperm, and couldn't find any at all that were wriggling. They said they would keep looking, but that I may not get any for ICSI. Around 40 mins later, I got another call saying they had found one single motile sperm. They ICSId one egg, it fertilised, and once again I had a stupid Day 1 transfer.


    BFN.


    Cycle #3:
    We found a new and wonderful clinic and FS in Brisbane. DH underwent TESA this time, but they still found zero sperm. We had anonymous donor sperm from the US as back-up, so even though I was sad that DH wouldn't be able to have his own biological child, I was excited to see what kind of results we'd get with good quality sperm.


    Well once again I was crushed to get a call to say that out of 8 eggs, 7 mature, only 2 fertilised after ICSI. The embryos' growth slowed after Day 3, so I had a morula transferred on Day 5, and the other was frozen as an early blast on Day 6.


    BFN.


    After this I had a Lap and Hyst done to make sure all my bits were okay. My FS found a little bit of endo which he removed, but other than that everything was fine.


    Cycle #4:
    We decided to try with a different donor this time, just in case there was some freak situation where the first donor's sperm didn't mesh well with my eggs. This time we got 7 eggs, 6 mature... and only 2 fertilised, AGAIN.


    This time was even worse for the embies; yet again they slowed after Day 3, I had another morula transferred on Day 4, and the second emby arrested.


    BFN.


    My FS was stumped, but we both acknowledged that there was some inexplicable problem with my eggs too. I was only 31, so it's not like my age was against me either.


    He started talking donor eggs straight away, which I was open to, but I wanted to have one last crack with my own eggs first. We came up with the following plan:


    - I'd go on DHEA and testosterone gel for 3 months to try and improve my eggs
    - We would add Saizen (human growth hormone) during stims for cycle 5, and my dose of stims would be maxed out (600iu Gonal F per day!)
    - I'd do an endo biopsy for NK cells to make sure that wasn't an issue for me too (results were fortunately normal)
    - While I was taking the drugs for 3 months, I'd do an FET cycle (Cycle #5) to transfer my one frostie. It survived, but was a BFN


    I also sought out an egg donor via the Egg Donations Australia forum to have lined up in case my next cycle failed, and an amazing lady who I've still never met IRL volunteered, which in itself filled me with hope for the first time in months.


    Cycle #6:
    After throwing everything at the wall, I was THRILLED to discover that we got 15 eggs. The next morning, I got the call to say that they were ALL mature, and that 10 had fertilised!! I was in JB HiFi with DH when I got the call, and after I hung up I went straight to him and gave him a huge hug. The good news continued over the next few days; in the end, we got 4x Day 5 blasties and 1x Day 6! We transferred the two best ones...


    BFP!!! I had an absolutely textbook-perfect pregnancy, and our beautiful DS was born at 39+2.


    TTC #2 (and our last)...


    It took longer than I was hoping to start the process for #2. When DS was 3.5 months old, we moved to England, and IVF is crazy expensive over there. Plus, even though since I was 18 I'd been pining away for a child of my own, I was horrified to discover that I wasn't a fantastic mum. I was lazy and unmotivated, and found interaction and play with him difficult, draining and very very dull. So I wasn't even sure if I should have been subjecting another child to a sub-par mother.. but in the end, the desire to give DS a sibling, plus the desperate NEED to experience pregnancy and the newborn stage again (and to try and enjoy the latter, cause I HATED it with DS and had undiagnosed PNA/PND) won me over.


    Cycle #7:
    I was able to organise an FET of two of our three remaining frosties (the other two Day 5s) at our Brisbane clinic through emails with a nurse, and a Skype appt with my wonderful FS. I travelled back to Perth alone with my then 18 month old (erm, fun..), stayed with my parents again, had my lining scan done in Perth, then flew to Brisbane for two nights to have my transfer.


    BFN.


    Cycle #8:
    As soon as I returned to England, I started researching clinics there. There were two in a city near us, so I chose the one that had the most professional-looking website, lol.


    I won't go on about it, but the whole experience with this clinic was terrible. They were just SO incompetent, it blew me away. But we didn't have any other options at the time. We forked out the equivalent of around $14,000 out-of-pocket for the most dismal cycle which should have been cancelled before trigger. I only had three follies, and two of them grew too quickly. They triggered me on CD 8 (!), I got 3 eggs, 2 mature, but those two didn't even survive ICSI, they disintegrated during the ICSI procedure.


    I was pretty numb. DH was over it all and was happy to just settle with our DS, and maybe if we returned to Australia eventually, we could transfer our (very dodgy) Day 6 blast.


    Cycle #9:
    I wasn't ready to give up, but I knew DH only had one more cycle left in him, emotionally and financially. So I knew that to have the absolute BEST chance of getting pregnant, donor embryos were the only way to go. I started researching options in Europe, and found a clinic in Czech Republic where they create and freeze embryos from anonymous donor eggs and sperm, so they are ready and waiting in a bank to be adopted by couples like us. For only €3000 (not including meds), we could have two PGS tested frozen donor embryos transferred, and they would be matched to our physical characteristics as closely as possible. My DH took a fair bit of convincing to go ahead with it, not really cause of the donor thing (after all, our son is half-donor), but more the stress and expense and travel coordination and such. Anyway, by some miracle (and some clever cycle manipulation via the pill), I was able to arrange the whole thing so that we went to Czech on our way back to Australia for good (DH had been offered a job). I arrived back in Perth with two hatching blasts on board.


    BFP!


    And twins!


    I knew that putting back two PGS tested embies was playing with fire, but if I'd opted for a single transfer and it didn't stick, I would have spent the rest of my life wishing that I had gone for the double.


    Once again my pregnancy was smooth and complication-free, and our little girls were born via elective c-section at 37+1.


    They are now 5.5 months old, and our unusual but amazing little family is well and truly complete.


    Oh, and when their 12 weeks scan looked good, we asked our Brisbane clinic to destroy our Day 6 blasty. The poor old thing was borderline to meet freezing criteria, and given the fact that my previous slow-growing embies had been big fat failures, we knew Roy probably wouldn't have been worth the effort and expense of doing an FET from another state.


    So there's my novel. I know that there are ladies who have done way more cycles than me and suffered much worse hardships, but if my story can offer just a shred of hope for someone stuck in the dismal IVF trenches, then I feel it's worth sharing. xx

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  13. #168
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tinachris View Post
    Good morning @calypso75 how are you this morning?
    Hey Hun, a bit of a delayed response but I am as good as can be. I hope you are doing ok @Tinachris.

    I saw The Book of Mormon yesterday and got a good laugh out of it.

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  15. #169
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    I should see it @calypso75 it's just I've got no idea what it's about and the title turns me off..but I've heard it's good. I. Will go google it. I need a good laugh. I'm currently watching Grace and Frankie on Netflix if you need a giggle. Xoxoxo hugs calypso

  16. #170
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    Default The off load IVF page

    I
    Last edited by Tinachris; 01-05-2017 at 09:51. Reason: But hub is double posting on me again 😭


 

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