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  1. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by CountryMumkin View Post
    @Waggers70, her father and I would never let that happen. The end. Regardless of anything.
    If you won't allow it for your daughter, why for yourself? You're just as deserving.

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  3. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by CountryMumkin View Post
    @HollyGolightly81, I am happy for you that you have such a supportive partner that suits you.

    My husband also suffers anxiety and depression and PTSD and needs a lot of support also.

    @WiseEnough, I have to agree with you there to a point.
    @Waggers70, her father and I would never let that happen. The end. Regardless of anything.
    The point of my post was to demonstrate to you that you also deserve a partner that is kind and supportive. Suffering anxiety and depression isn't an excuse to treat others like sh1t or to slap your wife. Again, I think you both have a bit to work on before you add another child to your family.

    I think I've read before that you're 21 but you've been together 8 years (so since you were 13), is that right? But he has other children, so I assume is a fair bit older? How he is treating you isn't normal or ok, I hope you see that some day.

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  5. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by atomicmama View Post
    If you won't allow it for your daughter, why for yourself? You're just as deserving.
    Wish I could like this over and over..

    This thread is really sad. Op, I really think you need to speak to someone (in real life- who you trust) about your marriage

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  7. #44
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    OP, you are not in a healthy relationship and never have been. If you met yoyr.DH when you were 13, then he was 29 when you started dating. This relationship has never been healthy. Please, go to your GP, get a mental health plan and speak to a professional about your relationship. Please visit your child and family health nurse and ask for some help with parenting (I read some of your past threads). Please do not have any more kids with this man.

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  9. #45
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    Wait, what?! 13? What sort of relationship is that? The age of consent is 16.
    I think I read your husband is my age, 37 right?

    No disrespect, we all have different lives but these kinds of posts do make me wonder if someone is making stuff up for fun!

    Seems to be a few people around asking for lots of advice and not wanting anything to do with others opinions lately.

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  11. #46
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    I haven't read all responses, but I want to tell you something that you may not know.

    I work in child protection. 'Exposure to family violence' is a form of child abuse. That means, that from a child protection standpoint, both you and your husband are abusing your daughter. She does not need to be present - in the room - for it to count as exposure.

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  13. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bluebirdgirl View Post
    Wait, what?! 13? What sort of relationship is that? The age of consent is 16.
    I think I read your husband is my age, 37 right?

    No disrespect, we all have different lives but these kinds of posts do make me wonder if someone is making stuff up for fun!

    Seems to be a few people around asking for lots of advice and not wanting anything to do with others opinions lately.
    I agree with you...I am wary. But if these posts are real...what kind of a 29 year old is interested in a 13 year old girl?

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  15. #48
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    @Full House it makes you wonder. Unless it's like a cultural thing, arranged marriage? I don't suppose to know.

    I do know of someone who met her husband when she was 12 and he was 23. She had a crush on him. I don't think they actually caught up again until she was about 18. They did end up married though.
    I know a few people who have been high school sweethearts and married too. But they were the same age (13 or 14) when they started dating. Makes it seem a little less concerning I suppose.

  16. #49
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    Let me add to my previous post...
    The reason for 'exposure' being added to forms of child abuse was so that children can be removed from an otherwise fit parent. It means that if a parent (usually the mother) either cannot or will not seek help, and cannot or will not leave an abusing relationship then the child can be forcibly removed.

    The point where you are at now does not sounds as though it would be grounds for removing a child, but any child protection body would be very concerned and would want to offer support - to you, to your daughter and to your husband if he is willing. If, as a family, you can show that you have your daughter's best interests at heart and are willing to work with professionals to create a more healthy environment, then there will be a lot of support out there for you and a better future.

    If your husband is not willing to seek professional help, then there are still many services which are able to provide support to you and your daughter.

    If, however, you choose to continue as you are...let's look 5 years down the track. A man who struggles to deal with a crying baby and walks away is going to struggle with the behaviour of a child who doesn't comply with what he wants. If he hits you when he's angry with you, or calls you names, what do you think he will do when he's angry with a child. They can be infuriating! If you stay in this relationship as it is, and continue to defend your husband and this relationship as normal and healthy, then you could well be looking at the involvement of child protection in the future with a view to removing your child.

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  18. #50
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    I have been reading along but haven't commented because it seems to me you won't listen anyway. Whether you want to hear it or not both you and your husband need help, him for the way he treats you and you for the way you think it's ok for him to treat you that way and your thoughts of self harm. I don't think it's a good idea to have another baby until you are both in a good place mentally and emotionally which you obviously aren't at the moment. You also say you wouldn't let this happen to your daughter and that neither would her father but I bet he would because he obviously thinks it ok to do it to you. And I am sorry but growing up seeing your relationship like this she will think this is normal so won't tell you or even stand up to someone doing it to her.

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