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  1. #11
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    It's fine in my house most of the time.

    I prefer to focus on why they feel that way and help them to deal with the emotion behind feeling that way rather than punish them for using the word so to speak.

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  3. #12
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    It's just a word to me.
    Like pp have said it depends on how it's being used.
    It's not a word I really use a lot and if my elder kids hadn't brought it home from school I wouldn't have to listen to it as much as I do.
    Thanks to them everyone hates each other when they get mad.
    I don't freak out about it. Any hurtful behaviour is discussed here no matter the word.
    My life is too busy and stressful as it is without getting hung up on words.

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  5. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elijahs Mum View Post
    We don't say hate we say I don't like, DS actually pulls me up on this more than I do on him! The best was my 4 year old nephew who said "I hate my sister" his mum said hey buddy that's not a nice thing to say so he said "I don't like my sister" and she said now that's better
    This reminds me of when I was teaching:
    Student to friend: You're so gay!
    Me: Hey, you don't use 'gay' as an insult in my classroom
    Student: You're so annoying!
    Me: Much better.

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  7. #14
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    My mum came round a while ago, I saw this topic and asked her about it, she said to me Mason when your child says that to you in heat of the moment, it's the biggest I love you that you can get, because they trust you enough to vent feelings that much.

    I don't know if that's true though. My dad would always stop any of us if we used the word hate, and I think I will in my own son in future.

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  9. #15
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    I definitely don't think using the word hate is a punishable offence, but I do discourage the use of it. To me HATE is a very strong word and not to be used lightly.

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  11. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mason98 View Post
    My mum came round a while ago, I saw this topic and asked her about it, she said to me Mason when your child says that to you in heat of the moment, it's the biggest I love you that you can get, because they trust you enough to vent feelings that much.

    I don't know if that's true though. My dad would always stop any of us if we used the word hate, and I think I will in my own son in future.
    Awww i kinda love this because i do see the logic behind it.

    I never would have said it to my dad because i would have ended up in a world of pain.

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  13. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mason98 View Post
    My mum came round a while ago, I saw this topic and asked her about it, she said to me Mason when your child says that to you in heat of the moment, it's the biggest I love you that you can get, because they trust you enough to vent feelings that much.

    I don't know if that's true though. My dad would always stop any of us if we used the word hate, and I think I will in my own son in future.
    Yeah when my son is angry at me he stops off yelling "urgh I hate you" I just say to him "no you don't. You are angry at me but you don't hate me".
    When he says it to his brother, his brother just says "I love you" drives ds crazy hahaha

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  15. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by sparklebug View Post
    While they're little at our house its considered a swear word, DS 6, does not use it at all, if he does say it, he doesn't get punished, ill say that's such an ugly word, and he'll say "I really don't like." DD is 12, she'll say things like omg I hate maths, my response is always can you please use a different word.
    I don't know why growing up we had no rules about the word hate, but before I had my own kids, hearing other people's kids say I hate you to their parents really made me feel shocked/sad I don't know- just not right.
    I'm usually fairly tolerant with language, and I myself am a bit of a potty mouth, so I have no idea why, but I really have no tolerance for little kids using the word hate.
    My friend feels the same way. She was shocked to hear my kids saying they hated things. It's honestly never occurred to me that it would be offensive but it's great to hear where other people are coming from :-)

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  17. #19
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    No.

    It's a very strong word and I don't use it myself. I would be upset if I heard my kids use it.

    In saying that, I wouldn't punish them for it, but I would discuss why we shouldn't use it.

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  19. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mason98 View Post
    My mum came round a while ago, I saw this topic and asked her about it, she said to me Mason when your child says that to you in heat of the moment, it's the biggest I love you that you can get, because they trust you enough to vent feelings that much.

    I don't know if that's true though. My dad would always stop any of us if we used the word hate, and I think I will in my own son in future.
    I believe it is true.

    One the rare occasion one of my kids say that or something similar i just say " that's ok. I love you and there is nothing you could do or say to stop me loving you".

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