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  1. #1
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    Default Weaning - help!!

    Help! How do I wean a 19 month old?

    I've tried:
    - distraction with toys, TV, etc
    - food
    - milk in a cup / bottle (which she does drink at other times, just not when she wants to be BF)
    - chocolate milk (I know that's not healthy, I am desperate!)
    - wearing covering clothes (she screams and rips my clothes)
    - telling her that's she doesn't need it / that's it's all gone

    Nothing is working

    She has been fed on demand since birth so she doesn't have set times when she breastfeeds, she just randomly wants it - usually 6-8 times a day when we are together. She's fine without it when I'm not around.

    She wasn't exclusively BF, she had formula from when she was about 3-4 weeks old. Up until about 12 months old she didn't have any preference for formula vs breastmilk (I should have weaned then, if I had know what things would be like now I would have...) but now she has epic screaming tantrums if I don't BF when she wants it.

    Does anyone have some outside the box tips?

    I'm getting married in a few months and I really want to wean beforehand.

    Hit me with your great ideas

  2. #2
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    Been there.

    I was so frustrated that there is tonnes of info on weaving a baby but next to zero info on weaning a booby loving toddler.

    There IS going to be tears. There IS going to be tantrums. You may want to stop but she doesn't.

    If you really want to you just need to be firm and consistent. The advice I read is after 15 months the best approach is simply cold turkey. A few rough days, on both of you, but then it's forgotten. If they are used to being fed on demand trying to cut down a feed or so a day won't work.

    I ended up waiting till 2 years as dd1's comprehension was soooo much better so understood (but still didn't like it) when I said boobies were for baby. But even then it was distract distract distract, taking them out,, covering up, not sitting down and some tears for a few days. And mastistis. She asked off and on for about a month but no longer kicked up a fuss when I said all gone.

    Good luck xxxx will be going through it again soon with dd2 (currently almost 16 months).

    Ps some women I know just go away for a few days....

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    babyno1onboard  (18-02-2017)

  4. #3
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    Weaning a booby baby is hard. We ended up weaning when DS was 2.5yo(ish). Every time we tried before was hysterical tears/screaming/clawing at clothes.

    For us distraction probably worked the best. As in 'be out of the house and be in the shops/playground etc and do not gove a chance to feed' kind of distraction.

    I did wean slowly in the end s O had to night wean too. We ended up dropping before bed feed first and early morning feed party last. During the daytime we worked on feeding on wakeup and nap. I dropped the naptime last on the day.

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  6. #4
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    I'll follow along to see what the suggestions are.
    I'm still nursing my 2.5 yr old about 3 times a day. I have no real hurry to stop. It's the longest I've breastfed and the first time I haven't had to give up for any reason. I'm not sure I want to go past 3 though.

    Personally I wouldn't go cold turkey. It's going to hurt both of you. You physically as well as emotionally and her emotionally.
    What are her triggers when she wants to nurse?
    I guess I've been lucky that my kids either substituted with the bottle or just weaned themselves down. I've breastfed 6 kids and can't imagine going cold turkey. I've always demand fed as well.

    I would probably just keep persisting with somehow distracting her. It's a tough age I think because they are becoming their own little person around this age.

    Is there something you can take to dry your milk naturally?? Must be a herb. If the milk starts decreasing that might help? I know my daughter got fussy for a while when my milk started dropping down and I didn't feel as full. She didn't like latching for a bit because it felt different.

    Otherwise I think just be calmly and kindly persistent with telling her later. Maybe not using words like no or all gone might keep her calmer. Maybe say milk or whatever you call it is for bed time or whenever you want it to be?
    I think it's possible to wean her down in your time frame.
    Hopefully there will be more replies for advice 🙂

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    My dd was just over 2 when I weaned her. In the months before, I stopped feeding on demand and started reducing/delaying feeds until we were only feeding to sleep, when we got home from childcare, and in the morning. She only expected to bf at home by that age so we spent a lot of time out of the house. I avoided sitting down. I talked to her about how all the milk would be gone soon.
    In the end I went with bribery. She picked out a toy she really wanted at the shops and we talked a lot about how we'd go back and get it when she didn't have milk anymore. Eventually one day she decided she wanted the toy more than the milk. There were still some tears but overall it wasn't too bad.

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  10. #6
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    I breastfed my 3 children until they were 18 months old each. They all had no intention of being weaned. I went away for 2-3 nights each time and left them with DH. They were fine, they were eating solids, drinking from a cup or bottle by this age. Each time I came back they seemed to have forgotten and never asked for it again (except for the middle child, she went right back to feeding and we had to try again a few weeks later!)
    I did get mastitis after weaning DS1, so be careful to express if you need to if you stop suddenly. Good Luck!

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  12. #7
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    Thanks for the tips everyone!

    It sounds like I'm just going to have to be strong and not give into the tantrums.... we through today with only 2 feeds, basically I didn't sit on the couch once and we spent the whole day out and about doing stuff. There was one tantrum which we survived.

    I just feel so guilty. I want to wean for my own selfish reasons - so my boobs will stay one size so I can get my wedding dress fitted properly and also I'm just so tired all the time and think my body is just exhausted... we are going away for our honeymoon so I guess DD will wean a week after the wedding anyway, I'm trying to remember that and it's helping with the guilt.

  13. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by babyno1onboard View Post
    Thanks for the tips everyone!

    It sounds like I'm just going to have to be strong and not give into the tantrums.... we through today with only 2 feeds, basically I didn't sit on the couch once and we spent the whole day out and about doing stuff. There was one tantrum which we survived.

    I just feel so guilty. I want to wean for my own selfish reasons - so my boobs will stay one size so I can get my wedding dress fitted properly and also I'm just so tired all the time and think my body is just exhausted... we are going away for our honeymoon so I guess DD will wean a week after the wedding anyway, I'm trying to remember that and it's helping with the guilt.
    Well my DS was older but I found if you could get a few days of limiting feeds in a row it becomes the new normal and it should get better.

    And guilt is normal. I never expected weaning to be so full of emotions and guilt.

    You have done a fabulous job BF for so long. And she is happy, healthy and loved. Be kind to yourself xx

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    It's your reason, not a selfish one.
    Much better now than have to upset her when you're away.
    19 months was it, that's an awesome achievement for breast feeding!

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    babyno1onboard  (20-02-2017),Little Miss Sunshine  (20-02-2017),TheGooch  (20-02-2017)

  17. #10
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    19 months is an amazing breastfeeding achievement, don't feel guilty!

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    babyno1onboard  (20-02-2017),Little Miss Sunshine  (20-02-2017)


 

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