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  1. #1
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    Default older partner

    Hey guys am really not sure where to put this, my partner and I are trying for a little bub, he'll be 44 years old next month. I've noticed he's been feeling a bit anxious about having another baby, he assures me he really wants this just as Much as I do but I guess he worries about whether he can deliver or not as he knows how much i want this. Has anyone had older partners and have been able to conceive a baby without any issues? I'm not really concerned at this stage as it hasn't been long since we started TTC. I don't know how to put his mind at ease, he's been thinking about getting some tests done.. Maybe a part of his anxiety is because it's been 7 years since his last child was born. Would love to hear some stories. Thank you.

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    I don't think it's whether or not he will be able to conceive with you but more that he is 44 and going to have to do sleepless nights, nappies and teething all over again when he thought that part of his was done with

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    Quote Originally Posted by babybeeno1 View Post
    I don't think it's whether or not he will be able to conceive with you but more that he is 44 and going to have to do sleepless nights, nappies and teething all over again when he thought that part of his was done with
    Yes this is true, he has also stated this plus he ended up being a single dad of two kids when his son was 7 Weeks old due to his wife passing away. So I know he worries about things happening to me also.

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    Quote Originally Posted by AdornedWithCats View Post
    We had ds when dh was 40. We are currently ttc and dh is a similar age to your partner. I don't think my dh is concerned at all tbh. We had a discussion the other day about him getting tested as we've been ttc #2 for a while. My only concern with paternal age is that I don't really want to have kids after dh is 46 or so (thinking he'll be 64 when the child turns 18 ). We originally wanted a big family but I don't think time (and money) are on our side as we might have to do IVF.
    I've got my fingers crossed for you two and I hope it all works out. He currently has two kids 6 & 8 and never thought he'd have anymore so I'm super stoked he wants another one with me, we'll more than likely just have one more together. We've only been trying for the last few months and he's taken it seriously this month as I think he's realised he's getting older. I'm not worried of us not being able to conceive yet but if we get 6 months down the track and nothing has happened we'll probably look into it a bit more. Let me know if he gets any tests done ect.

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    Yes quite same situation for us... second marriage... and there is a 10 year age gap between us. Fell pregnant with #1 when DH was 39, just about to turn 40. And then while we intended to have another soon after had a bit of a rough time with things, decided to ttc #2 last year, DH 46 - fell pregnant but had a MC he's now 47. Not ideal but both my Dad and his Dad were this age when they had their youngest... the age hasn't made any difference to us falling pregnant.... DH adjusted fine first time around to sleepless nights though despite it having been around 12 years between children for him...

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    Hi there. My DH is 20 years older than me and he was 55 when we had our DS. We had to do IVF but although undiagnosed, I believe the issue is with me as I was previously married and we also could not get pregnant so I figure I'm the common denominator.

    DH struggled because of the sleepless nights and the constant crying... it's hard to do at any age let alone in your 50's.

    I don't think the age of the male matters too much with fertility, it's the female fertility that drastically decreases with age.

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    Thank you ladies for sharing your story, I am 25 so unless I have any underlying issues that I'm unaware of I should be all good. I'm pretty sure my partners father was around 55 when he was born too. Yeah I understand he may not cope as well as i would with all that comes with a baby as well. He's also worried about bad things happening to me or the baby (when we get there) which I can understand given all that he's been through previously. He was also a father a little later in life- around 35 was his first. Just taking it step by step at the moment.

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    You know what, getting his 'guys' checked is very easy & non invasive, he'd just need to go to GP & ask to get checked... Id tell him to go did it as as more than likely everything will be ok & it might help him to relax more? If there is an issue then you can address that also?

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    I met my DH when he was 40 and I was 33. We married and fell pregnant with our first on our first month of trying when DH was 42. We had our DD when DH was 44 and DH will be turning 46 just 2 weeks after my due date with our baby who I am currently 35 weeks pregnant with. It took us longer with No 2 and No 3 than it did with our first but I also am an older Mum (38 currently). It might be worth him speaking to his GP about his concerns if he doesn't /can't open up to you. It may just be the worry about doing it all again at an older age!


 

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