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  1. #1
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    Default 8 weeks and feeling STRESSED OUT!!! Help!!

    Hi All,

    I would really love some advice and kind words right now!

    I found out about 3 weeks ago I am pregnant, which is very exciting but now that the dust is settling I am getting very stressed out.

    Firstly, I have just started a new job and my probation period is 6 months, I know they can't fire me for telling them I am pregnant but I am worried I will loose my job because they won't want to give me time off... so that is freaking me out. Anyone else in a similiar situation?

    Secondly, I have also just come back from overseas and it is very overwhelming. I've been to my doctors to give blood tests, urine tests, and I have had a dating ultrasound and it's stressful, scary and too much. I don't have health insurance which is also freaking me out.. I have no idea what hospital I want to give birth at... I don't know all the information yet.

    Thirdly, I have been sick.. very sick. Since week 5 of the pregnancy, bouts of nausea and uneasy feelings, followed by all day feeling sick, and now diarhoea which is fantastic. I just want to share the news with my mum, so it would help me get through this bad phase.. but my husband is against telling her as it's too soon.

    So help me please!!!!

  2. #2
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    Hi I'm just over 7 weeks and am starting to feel very overwhelmed! I'm lucky enough that I found out just after my probationary period ended so now my biggest issue with work is that I'm also feeling really sick all day, every day, and I'm having to take a fair bit of unpaid sick leave which is less than ideal right now!

    Is it worth talking to your partner about telling your mum? My husband and I decided to tell people because we figured that even if something unfortunate happened we would want the support of our family and friends, so it would be best if they knew. That has definitely opened up avenues for me to ask questions, but at the same time it has had me in tears because I'll go to someone with a genuine concern and basically be laughed at. So I think it can be stressful either way!

    I don't really have any answers for you except to maybe talk to your partner about telling your mum, but I just thought I'd let you know that you're definitely not alone in the struggle- it's a very scary situation and I don't know about you, but I definitely didn't feel the gravity of the decision until there was no turning back!

  3. #3
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    Hi. I don't have much advise sorry, but just wanted to let you know you are not alone.

    I'm also struggling, trying to deal with all these life changes while dealing with constant nausea is just exhausting and overwhelming. I also can't afford to take any time off work (just off probation and virtually no sick/annual leave accumulated) and struggling to get through each day.

    In regards to telling your mum - I say just do it. I was hoping to wait until 12 weeks in case anything goes wrong, but I have been too unwell to hide it from my parents so told them on the weekend at 7 weeks, and it was such a relief. They are so supportive and have already offered to help out with anything I need if I'm not coping so it is a big weight off my shoulders. Ultimately, you're the one who is pregnant and dealing with not feeling well, and it's your mum, if it is really important to you, I don't think it is your husbands decision to make.

    I wanted this baby so badly and thought I would love being pregnant, but so far I feel sick and miserable and scared about what is to come - I don't feel excited at all. I'm just trying to tell myself that this is only temporary, in a few weeks I will feel much better and all I'm doing now is focusing on surviving this stage. After that, I can start to think about everything else.

    Big hugs. Try to go easy on yourself and don't put yourself under too much pressure. Do you have a good GP? Maybe go and have a chat to them about how overwhelmed you are feeling and hopefully they can give you some good advice or put you in touch with someone who can. At the very least they should be able to help you sort out the medical care side of things, which should take at least one thing off your mind.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by IPFmum View Post
    I don't really have any answers for you except to maybe talk to your partner about telling your mum, but I just thought I'd let you know that you're definitely not alone in the struggle- it's a very scary situation and I don't know about you, but I definitely didn't feel the gravity of the decision until there was no turning back!
    I totally agree with the above - although I of course knew that having children won't be a walk in the park, it wasn't until I was actually pregnant that I fully felt the implications of what is happening. It's comforting to know that these feelings are fairly normal and I'm not alone.

  5. #5
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    Tell your mum! your husband has no right to decide on your behalf if it's too soon! Why does he want to keep suffering silently? There is no good reason not to tell your mum. Even if things were to not work out you would want your mums support. So go ahead and tell her.

  6. #6
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    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Firstly, tell your mum! The support we need so early on is so important. I'm telling my bestie on the weekend, bc whichever way this all plays out, I know I'll need the support.
    I also despise the fact that you have to worry about your employment at this time! I have a second interview for my next dream job tomorrow morning. (The morning I got my unexpected BFP I had the first interview!cant believe I held it together!) I hate the fact I will have to disclose my pregnancy and negotiate a shorter probation period If get the job. It's really tough, I feel you. Especially all this so early in the pregnancy.
    Also - TELL YOUR MOTHER!

  7. #7
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    @IPFmum
    Your lucky your probation period is over! I also hate the idea of unpaid sick leave, especially when it can't be helped. I ended up subtly dropping hints with my mum so she does know but not officially, I felt bad breaking the promise but I needed to tell her because I need her support!


    @ivyninja
    How are you coping with the nausea? Have you found any ways to deal with it better? I am also in the same situation of no sick or annual leave, and even worse I am on a 6 month probation period. I have heard after the first trimester it gets better, so if you are suffering now apparently it does get better after!

    @babybloom
    Yes I have unofficially told her! He is just worried that if we share the news too soon and it doesn't work out, then we need to share that bad news too!... but I agree, it is too hard not telling her. I think we will wait another week then share the news with her, I need the support!!
    @MUG81
    Yes!! Unofficially told her - just explained she cant jump up in the air and get all excited until we officially sit her down!! Good luck telling your bestfriend, let me know how it goes. Good Luck with the second interview, I am sure it will work out well! What type of job is it in?? Fingers crossed on the shorter probation - I am certaintly hating the 6 month probation period that's for sure!! grrrr..



 

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