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  1. #1
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    Default Are you a Yes-Woman?

    Do you tend to allow your DH to have his own way to keep the peace? Do you not want to 'nag' so let things go all the time? What about at work, with family?

    Why?

    I think it's partly the way I was raised (by a true Greer femo lol) and partly I'm a choleric personality. I do have a filter, and I do always try to be polite but I also speak my mind. I'm never going to be one of the 'yes dear' type of women, I stand up for myself, I'd rather be divorced than under the thumb.

    I'm interested in what makes the Yes Woman tick. This isn't a criticism of this personality type btw. Just genuinely interested and thought it would make an interesting discussion.

  2. #2
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    Yes and no.

    I always have my say. Most of the it ends being done my way.
    I also follow the traditional the husband is the head of the home and the wife is neck that turns the head. So far in our 23 years of marriage we have never had a situation were we couldn't agree together on a path to go on.

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    Default Are you a Yes-Woman?

    No I would not class myself as a yes woman. I have a voice and an equal say in this household and relationship and I use it! Sometimes I lack a bit of tact when I use my voice I am fortunate that DH loves independent strong women and he wouldn't have it any other way here. He always said he wanted an equal partner not a yes woman.
    But having said all that I do have a philosophy of intrinsically wanting him to be happy (as he does for me). So I support him in his interests outside the home and some people may think he has too many hobbies taking time away from family. Some (who do not know me or my marriage) may therefore see me as a yes woman. I just support him to do things that make him fulfilled and happy as I can't see why I would block that. I'm not afraid to tell him to rein it in when needed and he doesn't argue with that as family absolutely comes first. I think we have a great balance. If something really bothered me I'd say so without fear. And he knows if something is important enough for me to bring it up then he probably needs to act on it.
    If a woman is consistently putting their partner's needs ahead of theirs to their detriment I'd consider them a yes woman and wonder why and what impact that has on their wellbeing but I guess we are all different.
    Last edited by gingermillie; 05-01-2017 at 22:27.

  4. #4
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    No, I've always been stubborn and dh is the first to know my opinion. I'm quite different at work though, I don't share my opinion much. And I'm stubborn with family but don't speak my mind to them much. I don't let much go - dh is the sort of person who if you give an inch he'll take a mile. My Mum used to speak her mind a lot and always quarrel with my Dad when I was growing up so it's pretty normal to me.

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    I'm not a yes woman with dh, but I think I can be at work. I will have to learn to manage that better this year as my work load will be quite full on already.

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    No not at work or home. If I have something to say I will say it. I stand up for myself. This goes for work and at home. Dh is pretty much the same, we don't let things unresolved if we are in a heated discussion or disagree over something, we both have our say, make a mutual decision and move on.

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    I am a little bit. Both with hubby and other people. But not so much because I don't have the courage to speak my mind or whatever, it's usually just because I'm happy to go with the flow so it's easier to let the complainers make the decisions. It doesn't bother me either way type thing. If it's something I'm passionate about though, I will fight for it.

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    Hmmm, my nature is not to be a yes woman but my upbringing was certainly to be one. Despite my mother claiming to be a feminist, I was sent to Brownies in the 70's which was all about being a perfect little housewife in training. I was constantly being told to think of others before myself and being told off for being "selfish" when I spoke my mind. During the 80's the rise of the superwoman- the career woman who is also the perfect mother and wife - again reinforced the idea that being healthily selfish was wrong. So despite my desire to be confident and assertive, I often lapse into carer mode and neglect myself physically and emotionally.


 

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