ADVERTISEMENT

Closed Thread
Page 8 of 10 FirstFirst ... 678910 LastLast
Results 71 to 80 of 94
  1. #71
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    4,202
    Thanks
    1,693
    Thanked
    4,585
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Unschooling4 View Post
    My thoughts and concerns are valid. Im really shocked at the amount of mums on here basically telling me to get over it! 😠
    It's a foreign concern for me. My kids have been at the beach since they were tiny babies. It is a huge part of our life and we get a lot of enjoyment out of it. From 7 my kids were surfing, and so it is a strange concept for me that someone wouldn't go to the beach because they have one pre-school aged child, and three older 'should be able to behave appropriately around water (imo)' children.
    However, you have been plain rude in this thread for no good reason. If you spoke to your sister like this no wonder she spoke to you the way she did. Like others have said, if you don't want our opinion, don't ask for it.

  2. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Full House For This Useful Post:

    Barnaby  (01-01-2017),bezzy  (31-12-2016),Happymum2  (31-12-2016),Mamasupial  (31-12-2016)

  3. #72
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Posts
    8
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked
    4
    Reviews
    0
    I personally would go, but I am not you or anyone else.

    I think you left a few keys bits of information out of your OP. You are not a strong swimmer, and your partner cannot help you supervise due to injury. It also doesn't sound like all of your older kids are great swimmers. Based on that information, I would probably go on the holiday but I might not take the kids to THAT beach or I wouldnt let them in the water. Personally, I believe kids should be exposed to water, and beaches, and taught how to manage themselves in those environments. Otherwise, we have lots of adult drownings.

    You have to do what you are comfortable with, esp when it comes to safety. 90% of people on here might think it is a great idea for their family (me included), but that doesnt make it right for you. I dont think you need us to tell you that.

  4. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to LucyBear For This Useful Post:

    babyno1onboard  (31-12-2016),Unschooling4  (31-12-2016)

  5. #73
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    4,128
    Thanks
    1,433
    Thanked
    1,379
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I have lived near the beach my entire life, a shark ridden beach I might add. I am not a strong swimmer at all. I can do a few laps and tread water, but I get tired very easily. As a child I used to go to the beach daily in summer as it was a quick walk across the road. I don't go to the beach much these days, despite hubby being a surfer. I don't take my 2 young kids to the beach. I can count a handful of times when I've taken them myself....

    Those times we have mainly sat on the sand, I am lucky in the sense that my kids don't do the runner and they are scared of the waves, so they play on the shore break, or we get a few buckets of water and we sit back on the dry sand and they just play with the sand and water. Sometimes we take a kite down as well, or bubbles.

    I can understand why you feel uncomfortable taking 4 kids down on your own, but as I said in a different post, if you're afraid of them drowning, well that can happen anywhere.

    You have a few options:

    1. Either dont go
    2. Plan your beach trips and get your hubby's help- or even your parents?
    3. Get a place away from the beach so your kids don't get upset that they can't go when everyone else goes.

    It sounds more to me that you and your sister may not have such a great relationship or you've had an argument and you're upset with her for various other reasons and this was the icing on the cake. I could be wrong and I am not saying that to be mean or offensive, it just sound like there is more going on which we don't know about. To get so upset when people don't agree with you...

    You're obviously annoyed at the situation, I understand why, I've had times where someone had planned stuff for our family to do which I haven't wanted to do or didn't think was suitable.

    If it were me, I would probably still go, but in the mean time, teach water safety, take kids to swimming lessons, talk to my family about what help they could provide on the days we go to the beach, and I would take other activities with for the kids, like bubbles, buckets and spade, kites etc so that they don't have to spend all their time in the actual water. By that stage your youngest child will be a year older and probably understand things a little easier. Your older kids should be at an age where they won't run off or would at least listen to you when you ask them not to go in/near the water. Unless they perhaps have learning disabilities or something which is understandable.

  6. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to SAgirl For This Useful Post:

    A-Squared  (01-01-2017),HollyGolightly81  (31-12-2016),Unschooling4  (31-12-2016)

  7. #74
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Posts
    334
    Thanks
    77
    Thanked
    69
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Kaya View Post
    I do think you're taking the wrong approach to the situation. If you take a step back and stop focusing on the "oh no, beach!" aspect you might be able to see it for what it is. Your family want to spend time together in a celebration for your father. I'm sure there's a way you can compromise.

    The way you're talking about your sister is just plain offensive. Why should she have responsibility for your children when you won't even make their own father have responsibility for them? She wasn't there during the act of conception, I presume, and had no choice about whether or not you had children or the number you had. If she wants to help out I'd welcome it, but getting self-righteous because she doesn't want to be Mary Poppins of her own accord is ridiculous.

    Take board games. Take a bucket and spade. Take a volleyball. Take their bikes. Take books. Take pencils. Take paint. Take bubbles. There are plenty of activities you can engage the children in that are thankfully also transferable to a seaside town. No one is forcing you to toss your kids in the water and wait for a survival of the fittest scenario. I also question when you're going to give them exposure and encourage water wise skills? It astounds me the eldest children have missed out on such an experience before now.
    What do you mean my eldest kids have missed out? On lessons? The beach? They have all had lessons in the past and been to beaches. Not one with massive waves though. Actually my 12 year old a few years ago we took her to the same beach (it was only her, she was 9) and too scared.

  8. #75
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Posts
    334
    Thanks
    77
    Thanked
    69
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Full House View Post
    It's a foreign concern for me. My kids have been at the beach since they were tiny babies. It is a huge part of our life and we get a lot of enjoyment out of it. From 7 my kids were surfing, and so it is a strange concept for me that someone wouldn't go to the beach because they have one pre-school aged child, and three older 'should be able to behave appropriately around water (imo)' children.
    However, you have been plain rude in this thread for no good reason. If you spoke to your sister like this no wonder she spoke to you the way she did. Like others have said, if you don't want our opinion, don't ask for it.
    I wasn't rude to my sister. I simply said i was concerned about my kid's at a rough and dangerous surf beach so i didnt agree on the holiday destination. She called me selfish.
    Amd my kids and us go to beaches a lot too. Calm beaches. Not dangerous ones with waves and huge rips. Yes i know all beaches are dangerous so dont try and point that out. Partner's parents have a beach house and we take the kids all the time but its hardly crowded and very shallow with lots of sandbanks. My sister amd i used to stay in rosebud victoria with our grandparents and spent many days st the beach there.

  9. #76
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    13,064
    Thanks
    9,846
    Thanked
    12,967
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/1/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 7/11/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 3/10/14100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by Full House View Post
    It's a foreign concern for me. My kids have been at the beach since they were tiny babies. It is a huge part of our life and we get a lot of enjoyment out of it. From 7 my kids were surfing, and so it is a strange concept for me that someone wouldn't go to the beach because they have one pre-school aged child, and three older 'should be able to behave appropriately around water (imo)' children.
    .
    It sounds like you are lucky - have been blessed with both living near the water and well behaved kids with no additional issues/special needs?.

    Trust me - one unruly toddler or preschooler with issues can be the equivalent of supervising 20 well behaved pre-adolescents. Not something you want to turn a blind eye to or go onto battle under-equipped on (poorly swimmer, partner with back injury).

  10. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to VicPark For This Useful Post:

    mckel  (01-01-2017),Unschooling4  (31-12-2016)

  11. #77
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    13,064
    Thanks
    9,846
    Thanked
    12,967
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/1/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 7/11/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 3/10/14100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by SAgirl View Post
    I can understand why you feel uncomfortable taking 4 kids down on your own, but as I said in a different post, if you're afraid of them drowning, well that can happen anywhere.
    .
    It won't happen anywhere if the kids are supervised properly. In this case the OP is thinking about the risk in advance which is a good thing. She's saying it's beyond her abilities to supervise 4 kids on a rough beach. Hats off to a mum for having the foresight to assess the risk beforehand and making a call. It's the complacent, 'she'll be right', 'it will never happen to me', 'kids can drown anywhere' 'I will just duck in the shower for 10 minutes while my kids have a play in the backyard - pool fence will keep 'em out no worries' attitude that leads to the tragic stories we've been hearing a lot of lately.

  12. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to VicPark For This Useful Post:

    A-Squared  (01-01-2017),AdornedWithCats  (31-12-2016),babyno1onboard  (31-12-2016),mckel  (31-12-2016),TableDancer  (31-12-2016)

  13. #78
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    4,128
    Thanks
    1,433
    Thanked
    1,379
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    It won't happen anywhere if the kids are supervised properly. In this case the OP is thinking about the risk in advance which is a good thing. She's saying it's beyond her abilities to supervise 4 kids on a rough beach. Hats off to a mum for having the foresight to assess the risk beforehand and making a call. It's the complacent, 'she'll be right', 'it will never happen to me', 'kids can drown anywhere' 'I will just duck in the shower for 10 minutes while my kids have a play in the backyard - pool fence will keep 'em out no worries' attitude that leads to the tragic stories we've been hearing a lot of lately.
    Yes I get that. But my point being that kids can and do drown in other places besides a beach... they can just as easily drown in shallow water in your back yard. I wasn't saying anything about the OP being complacent etc. of course she is doing the right thing by assessing the situation beforehand, but my comment was in response to where a PP asked what she was afraid of, and her reply was she was worried her children would drown. So my reply was, well they could drown anywhere.

    I've already stated that I understand her concerns, because even though I grew up right across the road from the beach, I'm not a good swimmer and I have two young kids and I don't even take them, so I get why she feels like that, and I gave some suggestions.

  14. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to SAgirl For This Useful Post:

    A-Squared  (01-01-2017),HollyGolightly81  (31-12-2016)

  15. #79
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Posts
    1,579
    Thanks
    908
    Thanked
    957
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    So the OP has said it's beyond her capabilities to supervise 4 kids at a surf beach. Fair enough. So don't go to the beach. Arrange alternative activities. We've all been in situations where a childless family member makes arrangements that aren't child friendly and had to make the most of it. It's not worth having a family spat over. Suggest some suitable alternatives & if childless sister insists on the rough beach location, make the call whether to go or not (avoiding the beach if necessary).

  16. #80
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    4,202
    Thanks
    1,693
    Thanked
    4,585
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    It sounds like you are lucky - have been blessed with both living near the water and well behaved kids with no additional issues/special needs?.

    Trust me - one unruly toddler or preschooler with issues can be the equivalent of supervising 20 well behaved pre-adolescents. Not something you want to turn a blind eye to or go onto battle under-equipped on (poorly swimmer, partner with back injury).
    Yeah you're right...I've never had a toddler or preschooler that has been difficult or unruly. I've just breezed through this parenting business because I'm Mary Poppins and use my magic to get kids to do exactly what I want. I have no idea of the challenges taking small children to the beach can face. Pfft. As if.
    However the OP has mentioned in other threads that her kids are well behaved, and in this thread has said they are all used to going to the beach, that last time her oldest was too scared of the waves to go in the ocean, and she has one preschooler and her and her husband will both be there. He might have a sore back, but there are ways around keeping kids safe, and I have already offered a couple of suggestions.
    I don't care if the op goes or not, she has been rude to people who say they would go, and then stated she was surprised so many people would go...I explained why I would go, and why her concerns are foreign to me.
    I have so dedicated hours of my time preparing my kids for a life around water - swimming lessons from 6 months right through (they just continue on at squad level and it becomes a sport), dedicated Half of my day every Sunday for ten years for nippers, and paid for surfing lessons. My kids are strong swimmers, water safety smart and more competent than me in a rough ocean, and it has nothing to do with luck so don't patronise me.
    I understand this isn't the OP's experience, but you can still attend the beach safely and gave options to do so. Plus, I'm sure there is more to do there than just go to the beach so she could either avoid the beach, or leave bad back hubby at home with the younger child and take turns taking the older kids so it was one and one. The OP clearly doesn't want to try and make it work, so I don't understand why she posted the thread in the first place. But she has been rude and I have called her out on that. I stand by everything I have said in this thread...it was a what do you think thread and my thoughts are that I would go. The OP doesn't need to share my thoughts.

  17. The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Full House For This Useful Post:

    atomicmama  (01-01-2017),delirium  (31-12-2016),JustJaq  (31-12-2016),LucyBear  (02-01-2017),Mamasupial  (31-12-2016),smallpotatoes  (01-01-2017),TheGooch  (31-12-2016)


 

Similar Threads

  1. What are your thoughts on this?
    By BornToBe in forum Family & Friends
    Replies: 48
    Last Post: 02-09-2016, 08:17

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

FEATURED SUPPORTER
Be In BlossomWe offer physiotherapy run pregnancy Pilates, pregnancy Aerobics, and Mummy Pilates & Baby Massage classes with a focus ...
FORUMS - chatting now ...
Show me your sewing! #2Crafts and Hobbies
Mummy issuesIntroductions
Sublime SeptemberConception & Fertility General Chat
Ttc 2019Conception & Fertility General Chat
REVIEWS
"Made bed time less anxious"
by Meld85
My Little Heart Whisbear - the Humming Bear reviews ›
"Wonderful natural Aussie made product!"
by Mrstwr
Baby U Goat Milk Moisturiser reviews ›
"Replaced good quality with cheap tight nappies"
by Kris
Coles Comfy Bots Nappies reviews ›

ADVERTISEMENT