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  1. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blessedwith3boys View Post
    No neither dh or I have a favourite child. They are all special and lucky to be here. All 3 are treated the same. Dh's mum openly admits to her oldest being her favourite, he developed alopecia when he was 6 months old and she has favoured him ever since as she felt sorry for him and has babied him forever and not allowed him to do a single thing for himself which he is quite capable of doing. Dh and I agreed we wouldn't have favourites and each would be treated equal. They all get our love and attention and dh and I both have good relationships with each. I don't think either of us have more in common with one child or the other etc.
    Yep. The golden child sibling in my family still lives with my parents at 35 y/o, rent free, doesn't know how to use a washing machine, cant cook, has racked up thousands of dollars of credit card debt on my parents card (parents have since paid off) & has assaulted my dad. Yet my parents continue to treat him like a delicate, sick child. It beggars belief really

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    My younger sister has always been the golden child in our family. Growing up she was obviously both of my parents favourite. It affected me a lot growing up and always feeling like the outcast of the family. I ended up leaving home when I was 16 to get away from the situation. I expected it to improve as we both became adults but it has gotten worse. My parents barely speak to me, but they are always with her, they paid for her to get through uni and I got no support mentally or financially. Nothing I do will ever live up to her in their eyes. No matter how much time goes by I don't think the pain ever goes away, my relationship with my mum, dad and sister will never be a happy healthy one as there is to much pain there.

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  4. #43
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    I find my youngest far easy to be around/manage/enjoy spending time with him the most. My daughter is very hard work but I wouldn't ever give my son better opportunities than her, I try my hardest to split myself between them. I love them both equally I just find I prefer being alone with my son vs my daughter because we have such a cruisy time.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Starlightsparkle View Post
    My younger sister has always been the golden child in our family. Growing up she was obviously both of my parents favourite. It affected me a lot growing up and always feeling like the outcast of the family. I ended up leaving home when I was 16 to get away from the situation. I expected it to improve as we both became adults but it has gotten worse. My parents barely speak to me, but they are always with her, they paid for her to get through uni and I got no support mentally or financially. Nothing I do will ever live up to her in their eyes. No matter how much time goes by I don't think the pain ever goes away, my relationship with my mum, dad and sister will never be a happy healthy one as there is to much pain there.
    Similar story here too. Except my mother was quite emotionally and physically abusive to me but favoured my youngest brother in particular. By the time he was primary age she had mellowed a fair bit and my sibs suffered from her narcissism and abuse far less than me. Even now as adults she's always raving on about what he's doing. He's a grown man yet frequently moves home and pays not even enough to cover a couple of days of food let alone his share of the bills. But despite me being the only one of us with a degree, I'm the disappointment because I'm a SAHM and I don't own a house yet. (I didn't leech off Mummy for years, I've actally made my own way in the world on my own).

    To be fair, my anger at my mother goes well beyond her favouring my sibs, particularly my brother, but that's another thread.
    Last edited by delirium; 19-12-2016 at 20:12.

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    Default Discuss: Do you have a favourite child?

    I think I was my parents' favourite for a really long time (though probably not anymore). They often joke about me being the favourite. I think it was just because I was a fairly easy child - well behaved, dutiful, and eager to please. I don't think they treated me better though, in terms of opportunities etc. If anything, I tended to be the one who missed out on stuff if there wasn't enough to go around, because they knew I'd understand and not kick up a fuss.

    I'm pretty sure I'm not the favourite anymore though. Not now that I have my own opinions and the confidence to voice them

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    I only have DS so he's my favourite.
    I think my parents favoured us for different reasons.
    I think my sister was always considered the academic one, the cleverest, the most likely to succeed and was nurtured in that way more than I was. I'll never forget the surprise on my mums face after getting a report at high school and she said "you did better than sister!" As if it was a shock.
    Having said that, in terms of personality, I was always Easier to get along with, more likely to keep the peace.
    So rather than favourite, they probably preferred different aspects of each of us.

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    No I don't have a favourite.

    My older brother was the favourite growing up, my parents openly admitted it especially my mum, it's still very obvious. I've moved overseas and he is still near where they live which makes us even more grown apart. My mum often said she never wanted another child after my brother was born like I was unwanted and a burden and it's obvious and still feels like it when we talk. It's not a great feeling and never has been so I'd not want to put that on my children. I have 3 children and my son has quite severe special needs which places him in more attention given to him but I don't believe it makes him a favourite. I do however have my moments when one child is acting up or more hard work than another child where I don't feel quite so connected to them but that changes often.

    I feel very distant with my parents and could happily live without talking or dealing with them so I believe it's had a forever lasting impact with how I feel they've treated me, I'd not want that for my children.

    Also my brother got all his education paid for, his wedding and honeymoon. They wouldn't help me with anything like that, he gets help with anything and everything but anything I've ever wanted I've had to work myself to get.
    Last edited by zoz; 19-12-2016 at 20:38.

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    Quote Originally Posted by yadot View Post
    Yep. The golden child sibling in my family still lives with my parents at 35 y/o, rent free, doesn't know how to use a washing machine, cant cook, has racked up thousands of dollars of credit card debt on my parents card (parents have since paid off) & has assaulted my dad. Yet my parents continue to treat him like a delicate, sick child. It beggars belief really
    55 and still at home, working but never ever paid a cent for anything in his life, no rent, food, no electricity, water etc, meals prepared, washing done, bed made and more. Yet he HAS to be looked after when MIL passes 🙄

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    Quote Originally Posted by Blessedwith3boys View Post
    55 and still at home, working but never ever paid a cent for anything in his life, no rent, food, no electricity, water etc, meals prepared, washing done, bed made and more. Yet he HAS to be looked after when MIL passes
    In situations like this though, do you think they are actually the favorite or is it more the parents overcompensating for guilt the feel due to an illness or disability?

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