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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2016

    Default Absolutely terrified of dying during childbirth...anyone else felt this way?

    I'm 40+3 with number 2, due to be induced in two days and the fear I've had all pregnancy of dying whilst giving birth is sky rocketing. I am getting so anxious.
    Honestly it isn't even fear for myself, it's for leaving behind my 1st born and newborn with no mum. The thought of them being in the care of my ex husband makes me feel physically ill (long story but he's not genetically their dad and NOT a good person or father to put it very nicely). He currently lives in a dif state and has very little do with us but if I was out of the picture who knows what he would try?

    I know the stats for the maternal death are pretty low in australia but I'm still just so scared. Tbh ever since I've become a mum I've been petrified of dying and leaving my child behind. Is that normal?
    It's just even worse now I'm pregnant again and close to delivery And I think my anxiety is what is preventing labor from starting on its own.

    Has anyone else felt this way? How did you overcome it?

    Sorry for asking such a morbid question but I just felt putting it out there into the universe might help in some way.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Have you spoken to your midwife or OB about this? You're right, the chances are very low. But you obviously have anxiety about it so I think you should discuss it with someone to help ease your mind. All the best

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    100 Posts in a week

    Default Absolutely terrified of dying during childbirth...anyone else felt this way?

    (((Hugs))) OP, the fear of death is very common once people become parents, for obvious reasons, so you have my full empathy.
    The good news is, Australia is one of the leaders in obstetrics and hence low maternal mortality, it really is very low hon.

    That said, you have crippling anxiety, so is there anyway you can ask your birthing Hospital to put you in contact with the Hospital Social Worker? They are there to help, and especially when your mental health is compromised, in this case your anxiety over-riding your thoughts. If you can do it asap the better, given that you'll be induced in two days time.

    Another thing is, maybe if you had some 'control' you may feel more at ease about things, such as, writing a plan or thoughts as to what you want to happen in the unfortunate event of a passing. Sorry, I feel ick writing that, but it may help give you back some control and more rational thoughts in terms of your fears etc.

    If you're having midwifery care, please let your Middie know or whomever will be present at the birth, you need some moral support. xx

    All the best hon. xx

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I do remember telling DH my 'wishes' if anything should go wrong when I began to labour with ds2..

    I think it's pretty common, but don't let it overcome you.

    We're in Australia, you're in safe hands.

    Enjoy the experience, now that I'm done having kids I truly treasure those memories.

    Good luck


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