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  1. #21
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    Ok so follow up question is, do I let my family know we may not let them know when I go into labour and will take it as it comes or just not say anything if when the time it comes we don't want to tell anyone?

    I had an email from my MIL this morning which sparked this whole thing - she's very old school religious - she wanted to let me know that her church ladies group are all praying for our baby to be healthy and that I won't have any fear going into labour. Don't get me wrong, this is very kind of complete strangers but I'm not crazy about the notion that something will be wrong with my baby if they don't pray for me or the assumption that I fear labour, but whatever. My issue is that she added that they've asked her to let them know as soon as I go into labour so they can pray for me. The whole thing just irritated me because she didn't ask if I am ok with her sharing that with them. I'm not too sure how to reply to her, just say thank you and then not tell her when I go into labour? Or am I honest with her and say thank you, but if she wouldn't mind I'd prefer she not share with anyone when I go into labour.

    This pregnancy thing has you accommodating so many people's feelings but your own, I'd like at least one day of it (the most important one) to be about what I want.

  2. #22
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    Id write back and let her know that you thinks its lovely that they are all thinking of you and leave it at that.

    Then just dont tell her and if she mentions it at a later date just say things got too busy and you were focussed on yourself and the baby rather than messaging anyone.

    That gets away from the awkwardness

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    AdornedWithCats  (10-11-2016)

  4. #23
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    Agree with RmumR but if you don't mind them praying for you and your baby you could also add in your email to her that in case you aren't able to tell her on the day, maybe they could just pray for you next time they are together? I mean why does it have to be DURING labour? Aren't they in another time zone anyway? They might all be sleeping

  5. #24
    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    Our parents knew both times, and I told a close friend who I wanted to be there to take photos the second time (she's also a midwife at the hospital I birthed at).

    But it was so fast I'm lucky I made it to the hospital let alone her 😂

    There were no dramas second time but first time my mum got ****ty about the lack of updates and it was a bit stressful after he was born.

  6. #25
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    I didn't tell anyone I was in labour. Ds was born at dinner time but by the time I had my stitches done, dinner and our first bf, I thought it was too late to call everyone so we waited until the next morning. My mum was not happy we hadn't told her straight away! I told her next time I would wait a week.

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  8. #26
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    We didn't let anyone know with DD. DH was my only support person and I didn't want him distracted having to try and update everyone, especially if I'd had a long labour (I didn't thankfully).
    This time around we will only be telling whoever looks after DD, so likely my mum or BIL and SIL.

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    MrsVZ  (12-11-2016)

  10. #27
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    Thanks everyone, all your input has really helped!

    I decided to chat to my mom about it and she mentioned that it really means a lot to her to know when I'm in labour and she will keep it to herself. I completely understand that I'm her only daughter and this is her first grandchild and she is so far away in another country so it's really important to her. I've just asked that she leave it to us to update and not ask every hour how things are going.

    As for MIL, I thanked her for the thoughtfulness but kindly asked she not share with anyone when I'm in labour and mentioned we'll update her as best we can on the day but I won't let her know when I go into labour and will just say we didn't have a chance to.

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