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  1. #1
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    Default What would you have done?

    At the library, my very busy two year old was "working" at a computer, a little 1 year old was playing with the chair next to his and of course DS declares it his.

    Before I had the opportunity to say the usual "no DS, it's not yours, you need to share" line I say many times a day, the little 1 year olds mother says "that's not nice, she can play with it if she wants to" to my DS. I politely diverted his attention to some books.

    Next DS runs up to the little girl to push her away from the chair, I manage to stop him before he made contact and I quietly reprimanded him (at his level). We are going through a phase of EVERYTHING BELONGING TO HIM! He then kind of reached out his foot to the little girl like a gentle kick (it wasn't forceful at all) which I managed to stop contact again but from the mother's angle, she must have thought it made contact...

    I again pulled him aside and was about to reprimand when the lady started almost yelling "hey, don't do that, that's not nice, that is so naughty..."

    What would you have done and what do you think I did?

    Side note. DS is very tall, he wears size 3 clothes and is starting to fit into size 4, so he looks older than he is but behaves like a 2 year old...

  2. #2
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    I'd be really tempted to turn around and say 'excuse me, I'm in the middle of a conversation. Please don't interrupt'.

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  4. #3
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    I don't know how I would have reacted, but commiserations because DD is doing the exact same thing right now. At the park the other day she kept pushing another little girl off everything she was playing with. It's frikken exhausting!
    People have been very understanding so far but I'm sure it's only a matter of time until I run into one like that!
    Interested to hear how others would deal with it.

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  6. #4
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    I would've been quite frank with her and told her to leave the raising of my child to me. I'm sure that'd leave me wide open for a counter attack bug whatever. it's pretty rude and mean to shout at someone else's kid (unless it's a dire emergency, which this wasn't).

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  8. #5
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    I probably would have just reprimanded DS and apologised to the mum as something similar happened to me today. My 2YO threw 2 handfuls of bark chips in another kids face point blank, so I told off DS, apologised to the boy, asked if he was ok and then apologised to his mum (and she was totally fine).
    Then that kid tried to push my kid of the swing. Fair game I think after having bark in his face. His mum was busy with her other child so I asked him to sit on the swing next to DS and show him how to be on the "big boy" swing and he was happy to oblige.
    Sounds like the mum was sensitive for whatever reason and I think that's fair. We all try our hardest to have kids that behave when out but it doesn't always happen I'm afraid!

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  10. #6
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    Tough one. I can understand from both sides really. I understand it's normal learning behaviour of a two year old, however no mother likes their child being the little girl in this situation. Perhaps she has had a tough day and her patience and tolerance wasn't at its best, yelling wasn't called for but being frustrated perhaps was fair. We all have our own ideas of discipline and some are more lenient then others. I understand the height issue, my eldest child was the same, it's hard but many outsiders do expect them to be mature as they believe they are older. So perhaps she felt you weren't disciplining him well enough. As I said tough one, I understand your side perfectly, I also understand her frustration for her child. We all go to the library expecting a quiet, relaxed, calm environment so her ideas would have been different had she been perhaps elsewhere, therefore she may have been more understanding. A suggestion maybe in future just say something simple like, apologies he is two and learning such and such. They may be tolerable.

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    I hate people getting involved so I would have said "excuse me, I'm in the middle of reprimanding him right now and you're not helping".

    Kids are kids, they all do that kind of thing at some point. When my kid is on the receiving end of it and I can see the parent is doing something about it, I leave it well alone. When my kid is the one doing it, I'm mortified and apologise a million times over once I'm finished with DD. Even though I know kids are kids and she's not the devil haha.

    But yeah, she overreacted IMO. You were dealing with the situation so there was no need for her to yell at all.

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  14. #8
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    I wouldn't be happy with someone telling my ds off when I was clearly there to handle it. 2 year old don't have the ability to share. I've never been in that situation as all Mum's I come across seem to understand that behaviour is normal at that age and my ds is big for his age too. I would have probably mentioned to the mum at the start of the interaction (with the chair/computer) that ds was going through a stage where everything is his. I would have tried to focus on the girl more - look she justs wants to join in/say hello or look she seems upset now because...

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    I think the mum was wrong to say that her daughter could play with the chair when it was obviously bugging your son. It was probably a rookie error on her part if her daughter is her only child and hasn't reached the unreasonable stage yet.
    I have told another child off for lashing out at my eldest. In hindsight I over reacted but my son was very timid and would be worked up about these incidents.
    I would try and put it behind you. In terms of what I would have done. Probably mumbled something and got out of there asap.

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    Quote Originally Posted by rosey82 View Post
    I don't know how I would have reacted, but commiserations because DD is doing the exact same thing right now. At the park the other day she kept pushing another little girl off everything she was playing with. It's frikken exhausting!
    People have been very understanding so far but I'm sure it's only a matter of time until I run into one like that!
    Interested to hear how others would deal with it.
    So exhausting!!! I have a 9 month old too... The struggle is real! X

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