Stories of men's experience of IVF and miscarriage are rarely heard, although they often involve heartache, humiliation, anxiety and pain. In the real world, women are the ones coordinating IVF support groups and contributing their stories to forums. Women are also the ones who make the phone calls for IVF appointments, even when they're arranging for a counselling session to help their partner. This group is intended for men to share their experiences without judgement. The goal is to find others who share similar stories so that we can try to relate, and ease the stress and burden of the journey to parenthood!
My wife and I started trying for kids a year ago. In a period of 9 months, we had 3 miscarriages. The first was at 6 weeks 4 days. The second was at 15 weeks and 3 days. And the third at 5 weeks. The year has been filled with so many doctor visits, tests, etc. We're now looking at starting IVF.
Here are the key lessons we learned over the past year:
1. Carefully choose your doctor. One of the main reasons we are where we are today is because we had the wrong advice and support from our first obgyn.
2. Do all the tests - even if you're told not to. My wife found that she has a MTHFR mutation and that she has a balanced translocation (kareotype blood test).
3. Friendships are tested - those we expected to support us didn't and others surprised us with their kindness!
I guess the hardest thing through all this has been a lack of support. I have struggled with going through this but also with watching my wife go through all the physical and emotional pain and stress. She's super strong and is somehow managing all this really well. I, on the other hand, am struggling and have been really anxious. I've searched online for information and support groups but found nothing for men. And so I thought I'd start a group where we could relate and share experiences.
I hope to hear from the men out there going through similar issues. And I hope the women out there reading this will encourage their men to seek support and share their stories.
+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 3 of 3
-
06-09-2016 17:21 #1
Junior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2016
- Posts
- 2
- Thanks
- 0
- Thanked
- 1
- Reviews
- 0
Men, Miscarriage & IVF: Support Group for Men
-
06-09-2016 18:27 #2
Hi I hope you don't mind me posting since your post was to connect with other males but if I could give any advice it would be to do your research before jumping to IVF. Miscarriages can be caused by many things from egg quality, to MTHFR, to NK cells among others but a lot of these can be treated without IVF as I have read on here. Good luck and don't give up hope.
-
07-09-2016 17:07 #3
Junior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2016
- Posts
- 2
- Thanks
- 0
- Thanked
- 1
- Reviews
- 0
Thanks nattie84! I appreciate your support.
We think that the balanced translocation has been our main issue, however, the second m/c is really the one that's left us confused.
We've been battling between natural and ivf - however, I think we've finally settled on ivf because we'll be able to test for the translocation with PGD. That's the main reason really.
-
The Following User Says Thank You to al7 For This Useful Post:
nattie84 (07-09-2016)
Similar Threads
-
Support group, gay/lesbian planning pregnancy
By Lainna in forum Same Sex ParentsReplies: 196Last Post: 24-03-2017, 10:44 -
Miscarriage & loss support chat #4
By vatikin in forum Pregnancy Loss SupportReplies: 861Last Post: 06-03-2017, 19:34
Tags for this Thread
FEATURED SUPPORTER
The Fix Program Sydney CBD and BroadwayPregnancy and women's health physio, pregnancy and new mum Pilates classes taught by our physios for you and bub. ...
BLOG POSTS
LATEST
The difference between gagging and chokingBaby and toddler tired signs and how to recognise themA to Z of baby names inspired by Harry PotterPOPULAR
When can I start giving chores to my children?A guide to Parental Leave Pay in Australia – are you eligible?New baby nursery checklist – a guide to newborn essentials
FORUMS - chatting now ...
Names like Anne etcChoosing Baby Names
Egg Donation Greece #10Egg Donation
The Handmaids Tale Season 2Movies / Music / Books / TV Chat
Magical MayConception & Fertility General Chat
Accounting program for businessGeneral Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
Can you donate eggs at 40?Egg Donation
Prolapse??Postnatal & General Women's Health Chat
Ivf pgdIVF
REVIEWS