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  1. #1
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    Default At breaking point with my 10 month olds sleep

    I'm hoping somebody might have some advice for me about how to get through this total and utter misery that is sleep deprivation. My 10 month old has never been a good sleeper. Even a stint at sleep school didn't get him sleeping even a few hours at a time. We were feeding to sleep, which we no longer do. I get him to fall asleep in his cot by patting him and shhing him, sometimes just sitting there is enough. But I cannot get him to stay asleep, during the day I barely get a sleep cycle out of him before he wakes again and won't resettle. And overnight it's every couple of hours and he wants to feed (I don't believe he's hungry). I don't know how to get him to stay asleep longer. He gets so miserable because he's overtired and I'm feeling miserable due to pure exhaustion. I feel like my two older kids are really suffering and not getting enough time with me because my youngest refuses to sleep and our don't know how much longer I can cope with it. I feel like leaving him to cry is not an option because he just becomes so distressed and will absolutely not settle. What do I do? I had no idea one babies lack of sleep could have such a negative effect on a whole family.

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    Really feel for you. You must just be so exhausted. I was where you are about 6 months ago. Everyone kept saying it would come and we would find a pattern and we didn't for so long. I'm sure you've tried all the usual, dark room, not too hot or too cold, had enough to eat/drink and a structured routine. What about music? We play "music for dreaming" by ensemble Melbourne symphony orchestra and it works magic! For staying asleep too. I really hope you find something that works for you xx

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    Default At breaking point with my 10 month olds sleep

    Hugs it's tough. How old was he when you went to sleep school? The reason I ask is that I tried sleep training with my ds2 at 5 months and looking back he just wasn't ready but as it has worked brilliantly with ds1 at same age we thought we would try. So after 6 weeks of persevering things had improved a bit but not significantly so we gradually let things slide back. A few weeks ago I was at breaking point too so got a referral for sleep school but we decided to try cc again in meantime. I was absolutely terrified as ds2 is very emotional, he's super clingy, when he cries it's full on hysterics etc so I honestly feared it might break him. However it was like flicking a switch and he just seemed to get it. Now 2 weeks in he's reliably sleeping through the night from 7-5 with no wakings and we are just trying to work on resettling in the mornings and for naps. He still wakes up from a nap after 30 mins but we are managing to get him to resettle within about 10 mins and he often has another 20-40 mins. Don't lose hope, is it possible to go back to sleep school or do you not feel it would help?
    Forgot to mention ds2 is now 11 months.

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    Default At breaking point with my 10 month olds sleep

    Quote Originally Posted by peanuthead View Post
    I'm hoping somebody might have some advice for me about how to get through this total and utter misery that is sleep deprivation. My 10 month old has never been a good sleeper. Even a stint at sleep school didn't get him sleeping even a few hours at a time. We were feeding to sleep, which we no longer do. I get him to fall asleep in his cot by patting him and shhing him, sometimes just sitting there is enough. But I cannot get him to stay asleep, during the day I barely get a sleep cycle out of him before he wakes again and won't resettle. And overnight it's every couple of hours and he wants to feed (I don't believe he's hungry). I don't know how to get him to stay asleep longer. He gets so miserable because he's overtired and I'm feeling miserable due to pure exhaustion. I feel like my two older kids are really suffering and not getting enough time with me because my youngest refuses to sleep and our don't know how much longer I can cope with it. I feel like leaving him to cry is not an option because he just becomes so distressed and will absolutely not settle. What do I do? I had no idea one babies lack of sleep could have such a negative effect on a whole family.
    We were having the exact same scenario with miss 15 months. Waking every 2 hrs for a small feed. We decided to go cold turkey and stop all night feeds. We personally couldn't do controlled crying so DH went in when she cried and comforted her till she went back to sleep each time. It took 4 nights and now she rarely cries in the night. She generally sleeps from 7pm till 4am then stirs a bit and naps till 6am. So not perfect but a huge improvement. As soon as she learnt she wouldn't get milk at night she stopped waking for it. We got DH to go in as if she saw me I think she would cry more and expect a feed. Looking back those 4 bad nights to break the habit were totally worth it and now we all sleep better. Good luck x

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    We only came back from sleep school about two weeks ago. He didn't cope with it well (neither did I) and it just felt like it was a one size fits all approach and it just wasn't working. Going back isn't really an option unfortunately, it was a mammoth ask to have my parents watch my older two for the week with little reward.
    We try to keep the room dark. Play music. I'm trying to help him fall asleep in his cot, it all just seems futile. The last couple of nights I've just ended up putting him back into my bed just so we can get some sleep. We've cut back feeds drastically. I was pretty much an open bar before whereas now he's only feeding after meals. I'm trying to introduce a stuffed toy thing as a sleep association and as I type he's currently just throwing it around the cot like a maniac.

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    Have you ruled out medical issues

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    hi peanuthead, I wish I could help. Often times it can be just the little things that change and it makes all the difference. I suggest perhaps the controlled crying. I really don't know how it works exactly but there are people here who know the details. I think at 11 months bub would be old enough to get the pattern. it is very disruptive for the whole family when there is sleep deprivation. I hope you find a solution soon. marie.

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    Quote Originally Posted by maternidade View Post
    Have you ruled out medical issues
    What sort of medical issues could be effecting his sleep (I know that sounds like a dumb question, but his sleep has been so bad for so long I just don't know what sort of medical causes could be behind it).

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    Quote Originally Posted by peanuthead View Post
    What sort of medical issues could be effecting his sleep (I know that sounds like a dumb question, but his sleep has been so bad for so long I just don't know what sort of medical causes could be behind it).
    My daughter has a milk protein allergy, this caused amongst other things acid reflux which as you can imagine wouldn't be comfortable. It was worse at sleep time due to the angle
    Any allergy would possibly cause discomfort. I know a few friends that had major sleep issues and it turned out to be an allergy. Not saying this is the reason but it's just another side to the coin

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    Quote Originally Posted by maternidade View Post
    My daughter has a milk protein allergy, this caused amongst other things acid reflux which as you can imagine wouldn't be comfortable. It was worse at sleep time due to the angle
    Any allergy would possibly cause discomfort. I know a few friends that had major sleep issues and it turned out to be an allergy. Not saying this is the reason but it's just another side to the coin
    That's interesting to know. He does have an allergy to egg so allergies could be a possibility. Would he show other symptoms though?


 

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