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  1. #31
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    I always take my lead from the expectant mum - always show that I'm happy for them, & only acknowlwdge feelings for gender disappointment IF she expresses that first. That being said - I dont really get why people ask for friends to guess the gender, thus welcoming comments on the topic,then get annoyed about the comments or upset if most people guess the same gender? I have 3 kids of the same sex, & I couldnt br happier. No disappointment here. Some people made comment with the 3rd about 'oh, hoping for a boy *sad face', what a shame,oh well, etc,but I just laughed it off & said 'not at all, I'm thrilled with a 3rd girl'. I find if I show people I'm fine with it, they tend to follow suit.

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    VicPark  (06-05-2016)

  3. #32
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    Firstly a huge congratulations on your pregnancy!

    Like any sex, there is nothing 'wrong' with either, so please know that you don't need to question what's wrong with you having two boys.

    I have four daughters, so I am sure you can imagine I know where you're coming from. I didn't find out the sex of my girls before they were born, so all of them were a surprise. I had so many comments I have honestly lost track, however the worse for me, was seeing the disappointment in others eyes when they knew I had had 'another' girl. Nevermind that I gave birth to 4 healthy children, I gave birth to 'another' girl, and apparently that was reason for commiseration from others.

    I can still as clear as day picture the scene when I had an 8 day old DD3 in the pram, DH, myself and her sisters were all in a lift. In walked an older woman with her daughter. They both peered into the pram, smiling and asked what we had (bub was dressed all in white), so DH said a girl. At that moment and in front of everyone in the lift, the older woman put her arm around DH and said, "I am so sorry you didn't get your little boy" as her daughter was telling me such a shame it wasn't a boy. Here I was with a healthy 8 day old baby, perfect in every way, and there we both were being commiserated!
    For the longest time I too, like you OP was upset by people's reactions, I could never understand (and still don't) why people felt the need to feel disappointment for me, but moreso for DH as apparently he didn't get the boy he wanted (he has never said anything along those lines ever).

    But you know what, we are happy and that at the end of the day is ALL that matters, not what others think, and now, we cannot go out anywhere without people commenting on how lovely it is when they see all my little ducklings all together. If anything negative is ever said these days, I just say with a laugh, "I didn't get the boy recipe". Truth be known, unless you know me, you wouldn't know either way if I did or didn't have gender disappointment, so those who really know me, know that I never did and that is the honest truth.

    Sorry for the waffling on! All the best with the rest of your pregnancy.

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    Simil  (26-04-2017)

  5. #33
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    I'm pregnant with second boy and also my last. My whole family both sides including myself wanted a girl, everyone was hoping for me but as soon as I heard scrotum at the scan I knew it was all over, I yelled no, I don't want a boy I've already got one, why do I always get boys! We're my exact words..

    But I have now accepted it I'm 20weeks, had two scans which said boys and I'm ok with it, my first boy is my prince I love him to bits and I'm thinking I probably couldn't handle a girl anyway. But my family were saying don't worry scan could be wrong and are you sure? Well after two scans and seeing the willy which you could not mistake for a girl I'm sure and that's just life isn't it.

  6. #34
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    I desperately want a girl (I'm 7w at the moment) but... I think it's better having two of the same gender and if I had two boys I'd be happy. I had a brother and never got along with him. My husband has sisters, and the sisters are all closer with each other than they are with him.

    In saying that, if I have one of each I'll still be happy, but just saying, your boys are going to grow together and have a beautiful friendship

  7. #35
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    I completely understand. All we ever want is a healthy baby, of course. however it's normal to secretly wish for one gender slightly more than the other. I cried for 2 days after finding out we were having a boy. I've got one girl already and come from a large family & only had sisters. My husband couldn't believe my reaction , neither could I! I didn't know how much I had subconsciously wanted to give my daughter a "sister".

    I think two of a kind is awesome!
    Just think, your boys will be best mates and look out for each other as they grow older. Not to mention all the clothing you can pass down to the new baby!

  8. #36
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    I had a boy, then a girl who died the week before she was due after a random , unpredictable cord accident. When I was expecting my third I was hoping for another girl but honestly just wanted a healthy, live baby at the end of the pregnancy. I had a little boy, and got stupid comments. He is the light of my life and the most amazing little person.

    I would be telling people to get f'd and stop whining about the sex of a perfectly healthy baby. 6 families in Australia lose their baby to stillbirth each day and getting that upset the baby isn't the 'right' sex is frankly sickening.

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    cheeeeesecake  (25-04-2017),LagoonK  (26-04-2017),Simil  (26-04-2017),turquoisecoast  (25-04-2017),yadot  (25-04-2017)

  10. #37
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    It can be hard, but try not to let others steal your joy. When I found out I was having my second boy, I didn't expect so many comments like "oh you poor thing, 2 boys. You'll have to try for a girl" as well as some of the family wanting a girl. Mixed with all the hormones, it made me second guess myself.

    Now on the other side, my second boy is about to turn one and I am so in love with my two boys. So much so, that I really feel I want a third boy. So don't let others take away from this time If you can. Being a mum to boys is very special

  11. #38
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    Lol nothing wrong with boys. You should read my diary ... i had all my genders planned and everything until the rug got pulled from under me. Now id kill for a healthy baby .. thats it , baby.

    Be happy youre having a healthy baby and youre giving your little boy a great gift.. a brother. He will love that.

    Dont worry about what other people think.

  12. #39
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    Reading other peoples comments in this thread has made me so angry. I cant believe what some people have to go through and the assumptions they make. One of each would be lovely ...but a baby is a baby and some people suffer years to just get one.
    If i had 2 or 3 of the same and i got a snarky comment id be saying something like "wow.. i consider myself blessed to have these kids. I have longed and hoped so much for them. Your comments and gender disappointment isnt welcome here".

  13. #40
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    I would say the OP @mamatotwo has well and truly had her baby boy by now.

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