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  1. #1
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    Default Help with Surname

    Hi All
    Im chasing some suggestions as to what to do for new bubs (due August) surname please?

    A little background... I lost my husband two years ago and we have one DS, I recently started a new relationship and very quickly (unplanned) fell pregnant. My new partner also has a DS.

    At this stage, I have no intentions of re-marrying or changing my surname as I always want to have the same surname as my DS. I do love my new partner but as the relationship is so new and things have moved so fast under difficult circumstances, I do have reservations about the relationship standing the test of time (of course I hope for the best).

    Which leads me to the new baby, I have no idea whether to give the little one my (and my sons) surname or the FOB (and his sons) surname???

    Im not keen on the hyphenated names, but open to all suggestions

    TIA

  2. #2
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    What are your partner's thoughts on it? I think I would possibly go down the hyphenated route...if the names work together reasonably. Or use FOB name as a middle name? (Or yours).
    Tough one..If don't think babies should automatically take on the father's name in an unmarried situation, but by the same token, mum shouldn't get automatic naming rights either. Tough one....

  3. #3
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    I'm wondering a similar thing for myself. The baby's father and I aren't together and that's making it hard however I'm starting to lean towards his name but only because I have always felt it was important either in marriage or engaged which is what I did with my first ds however it will mean I'll have 2 children with different last names to myself and to each other. Things like family history and such play on my mind a lot in this case so I feel your confusion. I think you should talk to your partner about it however in saying that I was big and brave talking in my head on what I wanted to say then pregnancy hormones kicked in and I was lost 😳

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    I was in a similar situation with my second, DD. Difference was that her father broke it off before I found out I was pregnant. He was determined that the baby would have his surname, and so was I. We ended up hyphenating as he wouldn't budge. My DS has my exH's surname, I've got my maiden name and DD's is hyphenated with mine and her dad's surnames. Luckily our surnames are both of English origin and work well together. I'd rather she had my name only though.


 

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