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  1. #81
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaybaby View Post
    Thanks for everyone's comments and replies...it is interesting to hear everyone's perspective. And thanks to those who have provided resources.

    Can't remember who asked, but the nails are her own, not fake...I'm jealous of them...

    Just to keep the conversation going...what are your thoughts of these photos? This is my DD, practicing her Cali poses one evening by the river...photos taken by a friend (I was there). They are on her Instagram, along with other Calisthenics photos, in training leo or costume.
    I think the photos in itself are fine...I guess my only concern would be why is she posting them? For the amount of likes she gets? For the comments telling her how fit/beautiful she is? I don't think there's anything about them that could cause bullying as such...your daughter is very fit and athletic, and showing off her sport. But it's the reasons behind her wanting to post the photos that would concern me? My views are probably a bit skewed...I have a cousin (in her early 20's) who posts similar photos...and does it for the attention that the photo gives her. She never posts anything 'less than perfect' and posts photos of herself posing in a lot of different positions in outfits similar to your daughters. My cousin is a dancer, so whilst it could be argued that she is posting the photos to show off her sport, she's not. She'll get up before dawn and go to an exotic looking location ( sometimes with an equally athletic man and pose together )- for nothing more than social media attention and gratification that she is indeed, fit and worthy of being looked at. Lots of likes and comments about how amazing her body is warrants her photo to be either her profile or cover photo...until the next 'look at me' photo shoot.
    In no way am I saying that your daughter is doing this...but I guess I'd be continuing to talk to her about these issues that can come up...it's what bothers me the most about Instagram - that it can become such a chase for the perfect photo to upload, and people then wait for validation that their photo is, indeed, one of beauty and perfection.

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  3. #82
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    Default Social media and teens

    Quote Originally Posted by Janesmum123 View Post
    I'm not saying it's the child's fault I'm being relistic about what men are thinking as has already been proven on here. .
    On that topic a few days ago I sprung another dirty perve on a sperm donor thread on here (BH). That's like the third or fourth within a few months. There are perverts with nefarious intentions on the Internet including this forum. Another reason why I would be cautious about my kid posting photos of herself and re-posting them myself. Sad I know but that's life.
    Last edited by VicPark; 28-03-2016 at 16:43.

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  5. #83
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaybaby View Post
    Thanks for everyone's comments and replies...it is interesting to hear everyone's perspective. And thanks to those who have provided resources.

    Can't remember who asked, but the nails are her own, not fake...I'm jealous of them...

    Just to keep the conversation going...what are your thoughts of these photos? This is my DD, practicing her Cali poses one evening by the river...photos taken by a friend (I was there). They are on her Instagram, along with other Calisthenics photos, in training leo or costume.
    Gorgeous kid and very athletic but I wouldn't be posting online. See my previous post about the dirty perves that hang around the Internet (including BH).

  6. #84
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    I'm wondering what people's opinions on these pics would be if it were a boy in the pictures instead of a girl?

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  8. #85
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    Quote Originally Posted by babyla View Post
    I'm wondering what people's opinions on these pics would be if it were a boy in the pictures instead of a girl?
    probably wouldn't even get mentioned !

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    Quote Originally Posted by Louise41 View Post
    probably wouldn't even get mentioned !
    I disagree. If a preened male was Scantily dressed in an athletic outfit in a non athletic setting I would say the same thing (there is an element of look at me behind the photo).

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  11. #87
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    I disagree. If a preened male was Scantily dressed in an athletic outfit in a non athletic setting I would say the same thing (there is an element of look at me behind the photo).
    The boys/men that pose showing off after their workouts get 'look at your gains' comments not 'you're asking for s*x' in negative shaming way.

    Lets also again say this is about 13 year olds.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaybaby View Post
    Just to keep the conversation going...what are your thoughts of these photos? This is my DD, practicing her Cali poses one evening by the river...photos taken by a friend (I was there). They are on her Instagram, along with other Calisthenics photos, in training leo or costume.
    I think it is naive to have pics like this accessible on the open web. And, keeping in mind, that even with super privacy settings any photo can be "right clicked" and "saved" by anyone able to view it - a friend of a friend, perhaps or creepy relative. Though we, as mothers can look and see athletic ability & work out gear, the world is just not that innocent.

    While I agree we shouldn't be body shaming young girls, we do need to teach them protective behaviours for living in our reality.

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  14. #89
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    On that topic a few days ago I sprung another dirty perve on a sperm donor thread on here (BH). That's like the third or fourth within a few months. There are perverts with nefarious intentions on the Internet including this forum. Another reason why I would be cautious about my kid posting photos of herself and re-posting them myself. Sad I know but that's life.
    Dirty perves hang out everywhere, as do paedophiles and criminals. I truly dont lose any sleep about them looking at pictures of my kids. They will be dirty perves and peds regardless of what me and my children do. I am much more wary about the people around me - my family, my friends, my childrens friends and their siblings and parents - its an awful truth that most abuse comes from with your own social circle, and rarely from strangers

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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    It's not all about educating men. This is a teachable moment too for a young girl in the ops DD's position - girls are worth more than their bodies. There's no need to preen to attract friends or a partner. Knock people out with your wit and kindness, not your body.
    If you were to tell the OPs daughter that her photo was inappropriate because boys might want to have sex with her, I think you'd be giving the wrong message. When you say that it's not ok to post these photos on Facebook you're basically telling her that all boys will see is her body. Kind of the opposite of what you want IMO.

    This photo doesn't determine her value. It is just a nice photo and she obviously thought it looked good and wanted to share it. If people can't see past that to her personality and all the other things that make her awesome, that is not her problem.
    Last edited by DarcyJ; 28-03-2016 at 17:24.

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