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  1. #171
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    @Tahli good on you for going through with the Hydrothingmebobby and getting through it without a GA! Well done! I am a huge sook when it comes to pain or getting anything done, (which is why I cancelled my hysteroscopy even though it was being done under GA!!!) so good on you for following through and crossing that one of the list, woohoo!

    @Blossom74 well done on getting that loan through, that must be a huge sigh of relief and now you can just get on with finding a donor, yay!

    I'm feeling pretty positive but am a bit distressed that now I look like I have to make another choice and I was hoping to not have to.. But it's a good choice to have to make! Any help or advice would be appreciated!

    Option 1) My friend as a known donor in Aus. Early thirties, very healthy, lovely girl who I would be honoured to be gifted with her eggs, features are a little different as she is a little taller and thinner than me, but blue eyes, dark blonde hair and an attractive girl. No pregnancies and not interested in having children herself, but seems to be quite keen to donate to me. She's back in Australia in June and could possibly get started on a June cycle, all going well. Costs would be similar to a DE South Africa cycle from what I can tell, but we will be doing the cycle locally, so no travel costs for us or for her.

    Option 2) South Africa DE. 21 year old donor, not donated before but has two children herself. Physical features very similar and we look alike as children and have the same blood group and interests in life. DH and I can only get away in August, so we wouldn't be able to cycle before then. As has happened with a few ladies here, if the first cycle fails, then it is repeated trips back to SA to keep trying, versus local FETs. But 21 year old eggs are very attractive!

    My thoughts are to potentially move towards doing a cycle here in June with my friend, but keep SA as a back up and pay my deposits and secure my donor, but don't book flights etc until after I know if the June cycle has worked. If my friend doesn't respond well, or we don't get any quality embryos etc, then we can move forward with SA very quickly. If it does work, then I lose some deposits for the donor and Cape Town fertility, but I don't think I'd be that much out of pocket.

    Thoughts?

  2. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Summer For This Useful Post:

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  3. #172
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    @Summer If the finances are there to do both a Cycle with your friend then 1 in CT if needs be then I say stack the decks & increase your odds by starting with your friend in June😊👍

    If you could only do one or the other I'd choose 21 yr old eggs everytime so would wait & go to CT.

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  5. #173
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    @Summer have you done up a full list of pros and cons for each option? It sounds like you've started, but I imagine with your friend it will change the dynamics between you and you'll need to sort through her, DP and your expectations about what her role in baby's life will be? What do you think it will be like in 20 years? From this last post it sounds like you are leaning towards the 21 yo?

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  7. #174
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    @BlondeinBrisvegas good point about the costs involved.. I guess I would be hoping that if I did go with my friend then all would go well and we wouldn't have to do SA... But you're right, I do need to plan financially for that outcome... Hmmm. Not sure we can afford both so close together...

    @Gagingi I haven't done up a full list of pros and cons yet, just a general idea. Originally we definitely wanted a known donor as to attempt to avoid issues of the child not being able to find their biological mother in the future. I need to discuss those expectations with my friend - we are not close friends but occasionally work together and I really like her as a person. From what she's said so far she's not interested in having a relationship as such with the child, but is fine for contact. I think it could definitely work with her, I don't have any issues at all with that side of things.

    I'll have to discuss it with DH, I haven't let him know yet that my friend got back in contact and offered her eggs again. I think he will want to go that way first, he really likes the idea of a known donor and was excited about her offering previously.

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  9. #175
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    @Summer would a good first step be getting your friend to have basic tests done to check she is as fertile as you all expect her to be? Then go from there?

    I'm so happy you are in such a good place after all the months of stress and uncertainty.

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  11. #176
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    Great news @Tahli @Blossom74 @Summer !

    Thats interesting @Gagingi are you a scientist? I love stuff about the brain/body, it's super interesting.

    i just tried on some of my old fave dresses and they fit again! So excited, I felt like things stagnated there for a while with the weight loss but stopped weighing myself and kept doing what I was doing and all of a sudden I feel like I've lost a big chunk. Still got a bit to go but am really happy with what I've achieved so far, mind you the past week has not been very good with all the chocolate we've eaten. I've actually been feeling a bit sick and am thinking its maybe the chocolate after not eating much of it for ages.

    A few weeks to go and I'll be freaking out about having more than one follie/egg
    ive gone off coffee in preparation and am planning on upping my calories soon too. Don't think 1200 is a good idea whilst cycling.

    hi to everyone and nice to see some good things happening for some of us

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  13. #177
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    @tuxcat I know you were considering known egg donor. A few of us have been discussing sharing an egg donor, either as independent cycles or egg share cycles...so siblings can know each other in some capacity. I don't know if that's of any interest to you? Fingers crossed you won't be needing a DE cycle!!
    Last edited by Tahli; 29-03-2016 at 18:28.

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  15. #178
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    My goodness @Gagingi how do you function on 2000mgs of Metformin?!! I guess it just goes to prove what different women we all are!!
    If I can get my hands on the moula I'll move onto booking the ED immediately. Of course I need to have the unproven ED's AMH tested first, then she needs to have her pre-screening bloods done, wait a few wks for results, she gets her AF, then we can get cracking.
    I actually have two other donors I like.
    One is the spitting image of me as a youngster but is currently cycling for some-one else and doesn't live in CT so would cost an extra $2.5k to use. If she chooses to donate again she'd be available in June I imagine.
    The other option is one of the BubHub girl's proven donor who is also currently cycling for some-one else, and again if she chooses to donate again would be available around June too.

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  17. #179
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tahli View Post
    @tuxcat I know you were considering known egg donor. A few of us have been discussing sharing an egg donor, either as independent cycles or egg share cycles...so siblings can know each other in some capacity. I don't know if that's of any interest to you? Fingers crossed you won't be needing a DE cycle!!
    Thanks tahli. It's an interesting concept but we are pretty passionate about having a donor whom the child can contact down the track. It's probably our only prerequisite. Good idea though and I appreciate you thinking of me

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  19. #180
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    Hi all,

    Quickly jumping on Dad's laptop to catch up so please forgive my brief post.

    @Summer, I read about your two options and if it were me I'd do a round with the friend first, then use SA as a backup. If you can only afford one shot though, I'd choose a young donor from SA. Younger eggs always win for me hands down!

    @Tahli, so glad your tests are out of the way. Hope you're feeling ok this evening.

    And yay for me! Bank loan through, and we just need to sign some final paperwork on Friday to finalise it all. Waiting on The Minister of Health to approve our ad now, then we're ready to rock and roll.

    @Tahli, I'll race you to the baby finish line!!!

    Hugs to all, back 'properly' tomorrow evening,


    Blossom xoxox

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