That is just setting yourself and your hubby up for failure. This plan will only serve to:
1) point score in your favour by making you more confident that your hubby is in the wrong and you are right to stand up to him/leave.
2) teach your kids that their body is for sale and doesn't need to be respected. You shouldn't have to prostitute your body to ensure your kids safety!
You have to forget (for now) about how your hubby feels, forget (for now) how angry you are about your hubby putting blame on you (bloody ridiculous btw!). Forget about tit-for-tat with your hubby!. Time to focus on one thing: your kids safety and happiness. It's simple- tell your hubby to stop or get out. Once your kids are safe and happy then you are free to go back and forth with hubby over semantics. Personally I would just kick him out if he didn't get help.
Apologies if this comes across as rude. I've been where your kids are and I have no tolerance or patience for parents that sit by and let's their kid be 'smacked' while they focus on themselves. Apologies again I don't mean to hurt you I am just pretty cranky on behalf of your kids.
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19-03-2016 20:02 #11-
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
Need help to repair my family dynamics
Last edited by VicPark; 19-03-2016 at 20:05.
19-03-2016 20:16 #12Junior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2016
Ok, that's fine, no offence taken. It's useful to hear what other people think about the situation, because it's easy for me to just end up thinking that maybe he's right. It's been brewing for a long time, and getting worse over the last year, so you kinda get too entrenched in it to see clearly.
I think I will speak to him, when all is calm, in the most unconfrontational way possible, express my concerns and ask him to come to family counselling with me. I guess that if he refuses, and doesn't admit a problem or tries to shift the blame onto me again, I'll seek help myself to look at my options. And try, in the meantime, to do all the discipline myself. And ask him to let me.
As hard as it is being alone at home with the three kids, sometimes it's easier than when DH is here and in a bad mood.
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