My best friend recently had a baby. While she was pregnant, she asked me if I'd be willing to be the god mother. For a bit of background, I'm not religious and I don't really believe in god, but I was raised catholic so I know how it all works. I respect other people's beliefs, and I would be happy to be a god parent and do all the expected things even if I don't really believe in the concept of 'god parents' per se.
So fast forward to today, she randomly tells me she's asked someone else to be the god mother. She also asked this girl's partner to be the god father. Her reasoning for not choosing me is that she didn't want to ask my husband, but that's a pretty poor excuse IMO because her older daughter's god parents are not a couple. She could have asked me and not my husband.
Anyway, I know I shouldn't be upset because it's her choice and maybe she wanted someone more religious to do it, which is fine. But when we last talked about it I got the impression she had already chosen me. And also, she's not exactly a practicing Catholic, she doesn't go to church or anything so I don't know why she's now changed her mind if that's her reasoning.
Oh and she then said "Don't worry, you'll still get them if I die." So, apparently, I'm the person she would entrust her children to if she died, but I'm not good enough to be her kid's god mother.
I'm really upset about it but I think maybe I'm just being silly
+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 10 of 39
03-03-2016 14:42 #1Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2011
Would you be upset by this?
03-03-2016 14:46 #2
I can understand being upset by that. She should have put more thought into it before asking someone. It sounds like she's backpedaling using the excuse of not wanting to ask your husband.
If I was in your position it would leave a pretty sour taste in my mouth and one I may not be able to get rid of.
03-03-2016 14:53 #3
I can understand how you are feeling. The people I have for my children godparents, one couple we hardly see, but we have kept in touch with the others. I also split couples for the god parents, so that is quite a common thing. I think she didn't think things through before asking you. Marie.
The Following User Says Thank You to SuperGranny For This Useful Post:
03-03-2016 15:02 #4
Yes, I would be upset. She asked you to be a very significant person in her child's life and then with no explanation to you changed her mind. I am really bad at confrontation so if this happened to me I would find it difficult to talk to my friend about it but I think if you feel ok with it you should try speaking to her about it.
03-03-2016 15:11 #5
When I starting reading your post I thought ehh let it go and don't be offended. But her comment that you'd get the children if she died? So heaven forbid she passed you are trusted enough to raise her kids but you aren't god mother bc she wants a couple? I'm not in the slightest religious but I'd be pretty annoyed tbh. I would probably make a passing comment said in a humorous way that you are good enough to raise her babies yet not good enough to be godparent!
The Following User Says Thank You to delirium For This Useful Post:
03-03-2016 15:39 #6
I'd be upset. It would feel like a bit of a slap in the face. I probably wouldn't confront her about it, but if she ever brings it up again I would certainly tell her how I felt.
03-03-2016 15:41 #7Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2012
- Brisbane North
yeah i'd be upset. and call her out on it about how i feel. especially with the last part.
03-03-2016 15:42 #8Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jan 2012
Poor form, very poor form.
03-03-2016 15:56 #9
Yeah, I'd be a bit hurt but also a bit puzzled at her decision.
I know plenty of folks who choose non-coupled God parents - it's pretty common actually.
03-03-2016 16:28 #10
Yes, naturally I'd feel hurt, definitely. I'm not religious either, but I think it's besides the point. Fact is she chose someone over you, AFTER she'd already told you she wanted you to be the godmother.
People are can be so annoyingly frustrating! Very thoughtless of her.
Prams and StrollersLooking to buy a pram or stroller? :: Viewer reviews of prams :: Pram Buyers ...
LATESTWhat is a blessing way? How is it different to a baby shower?7 ways to break the ‘mumnotony’ at homeGuide to government family benefit payments
POPULARWhen can I start giving chores to my children?New baby nursery checklist – a guide to newborn essentialsWhat to pack for labour and hospital – a checklist
FORUMS - chatting now ...
Would you breastfeed in public?General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
A - Z of baby girl namesGames & fun stuff
How long would you leave your 8 (almost 9) year old at home alone?General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
2.5yo hitting/pushing (possible ASD)Discipline & behaviour
Show me your lunchbox 2017!!Recipes & Lunchbox Ideas
Adelaide Hubbers #2Adelaide
The Not So Serious Vent Thread #7General Chat