I have a 12.5yo and a 4.5yo (and 10yo). I leave my DS home with DD on a regular basis for up to a couple hrs, and I have absolutely no qualms about it. She is mature and responsible, knows how to use a phone and has been taught what to do if there's an emergency (ie we have done fire drills ).
My older 2 are home alone from 3- 6pm on my work days. They eat, do some chores, and usually get dinner started. They have been doing it for nearly a year and no problems.
Kids won't learn independence and responsibility until they are allowed some...
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29-02-2016 18:51 #71
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29-02-2016 19:27 #72Senior Member
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Jeez my SIL won't even leave her 16 year old & 13 year old kids alone for 10 mins let alone leave the house without them. lol.
29-02-2016 19:40 #73
My DD had a friend at school who would walk home with her sister (about 5 or 6 blocks through the neighbourhood) and they'd be alone until the parents got home at around 5pm. The girls were 8 and 6.
I've only just allowed DD11 (year 7) house keys and 1 day every week-fortnight she rides her bike to school (10 mins). I still get her to msg when she arrives.
I couldn't leave DD6 or DS5 alone with her- I know they'd make life hell for her and it would all end in tears! Maybe in another couple of years though.
29-02-2016 19:45 #74
29-02-2016 19:47 #75
I also have no problems leaving my (almost) 12yr old at home, she has her own set of house keys. We have have a procedure/rules for everything, and she is always fine, I have meals ready or prepped to go, so she feeds herself. It's just that I wouldn't leave my younger one with her.
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29-02-2016 19:50 #76Senior Member
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NO NO NO!!! Absolutely anything can happen so very quickly, and I don't believe a 13 year old has the maturity to be able to cope with a dangerous situation or medical emergency.
I won't even leave our 5 year old son with my husband's two daughters who are 22 and 19 - they are totally untrustworthy.
29-02-2016 19:58 #77
However, I do think that no matter how mature and responsible an 8 year old is, they still lack the decision making, judgement and consequence evaluation of an older (12/13 year old) child and so while they make not intentionally do something silly or dangerous, they still may unintentionally do so.
I was also left alone for longish stretches of time (with my older sisters and without them) around the same age, and I got scared sometimes and did silly things sometimes... and my mum probably had no idea because she wasn't there.
But you are right, ultimately it is about risk evaluation.
29-02-2016 20:00 #78
On face value (as in no relevant other information about the relationship between the two/behaviour), I absolutely would.
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29-02-2016 20:29 #79
We (as a whole society) are obviously raising less responsible and sensible children these days if so many feel a 13 year old can't be trusted to care for a 6 year old for 1-2 hours.
I took a first aid and CPR course at 12, it was a course aimed at teenagers for babysitting. Like I said earlier, the carbon monoxide alarm went off when I was babysitting a toddler and preschooler and I immediately grabbed both of them and ran to a neighbor for help. My cousin has taken first aid and CPR courses and I definitely feel she's more sensible with my 2 year old DS than my own parents, even last year at 13 I felt that way.
Either we're raising children to be less sensible or we as a society need to lighten up.
29-02-2016 20:39 #80
Depends on the children. At 13 I was more than capable and responsible enough to look after a 6 year old. Especially just for an hour or so. I'd imagine at 5am kids that age would still be asleep in a locked house?
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