Hi hubbers, I need some advice, support, experience, whatever you can offer me. I'm sorry this is long.
I've just started a new job. Its a graduate job and the whole offer and acceptance thing happened 8 months ago so its been a long wait for it. Its many people's dream job - 9000 applicants, only 400 hired (country wide) big firm (but really low pay).
And its now day 3 and I hate it. I am so unbelievably miserable. I cry when I get home every day. I tell myself its only day 3, its going to get better but the staff who've been there for years don't seem much happier - they're all chasing deadlines and looking stressed. Its in a field outside my degree field, but I was told that was fine because they have top notch training. Well so far there's been almost zero training. Because the staff are too busy to train us. We're going to be thrown into client work having no idea what we're doing. And we have billable targets right off the bat. I feel so out of place as a mature aged worker - the other grads are young and fresh faced with no dependents. I'm working 10 hour days and its still not enough - I'm still the first grad to leave, but I have to go - I have kids to pick up! One of the grads is young bloke. He's getting all the attention. He has colleagues sitting with him, stepping him through the work, showing him the ropes, giving him chargeable work. When they ask who's free and I put myself forward - no one wants to work with me! They look at me, look awkward, and say, 'no its okay'. Not just me - the other female has the same problem. Its definitely a boys club.
Every job I've ever had I've been really good at (sorry to blow my own trumpet). I've won awards in every single job. So I'm capable! I'm a good worker. Or at least I used to be. Now I feel incompetent, awkward, and shunned.
And I miss my kids so much. I've made such a huge mistake. I should have held out for a more suitable position, I just thought I should take the first offer I got as the job market is so tough right now and I was grateful to just get anything.
Has anyone ever left a new job during the probation period? Has anyone ever felt like this early on and then its turned around and become great? Is it generally awful to work for a huge firm?
I feel so trapped.
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24-02-2016 21:52 #1
Just started work and HATE it.
24-02-2016 22:11 #2
I lasted at one particular job only 3 weeks. I am not usually like that (never have trouble keeping a job), but I hated that one so much that I handed my resignation in after just two weeks. Looking back I'm not sure why I so kindly gave my boss a week's notice, should've just walked out...but I think I was trying to do the right thing as everyone knows everyone in the real estate industry and I didn't want to get a bad reputation from that experience.
Anyway....so my point is that in my experience, if I have a horrible gut feeling on day one, like I did with that one, it is usually for a good reason. The job I went on to get worked out much better. The pay was pretty bad, but I was happy at work every day which is important. Especially when you're spending all that time away from the kids. As a working parent you feel bad as it is trying to juggle things and spend quality time with the kids, last thing you want is to be miserable at work. Life is too short for that.
As it turned out my 4 year old was diagnosed with cancer last year so that was the end of work for me for the foreseeable future.
Do what makes you happy xx
24-02-2016 22:14 #3
Oh and that 3 week job doesn't get put on my resume. It's like it never happened except that I got a group certificate from that boss the following tax season.
24-02-2016 22:15 #4
I think you need to give all new jobs a month to properly settle in and decide. The first few days are always like that.
24-02-2016 22:21 #5Junior Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
Might help if you say what profession it is? Billable hours as a graduate? Management consulting?
24-02-2016 22:44 #6Junior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2011
I have had that exact same experience in a big 4 professional services firm, and was desperate to leave for my first two weeks. In tears every night. I learnt the ropes, talked to some people / mentors who assured me it wouldn't always be like that and went on to have an amazing 5 years there which has given me invaluable experience to move onwards and upwards in industry. I did not have kids then though and i know the old fashioned 'badge of honour' for doing long hours is so tough if you do. Most firms understand that better now than they did 15+ years ago when I entered the industry so I hope they have policies in place to support you as a working mum. I don't think you should make a decision yet - you fought hard for the opportunity and I think you should give yourself a month with an open mind to see why 9000 people wanted the job. I'm sure there are many positives you're yet to see. Good luck.
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24-02-2016 22:58 #7
yeah I agree
I know its hard, but give it a few weeks before you chuck it all away.
24-02-2016 23:14 #8
I spent the first few weeks in my current job in tears. Nobody wanted to teach me, I felt like a burden, the staff were rude. It was a sink or swim approach.
I've now been there 10 years
Hang in there Hun if things don't improve then leave, but don't let the staff bully you out. Nobody likes to feel new and crap. I'm sorry that they've made you feel that way xxx
25-02-2016 06:24 #9
I would say give it a month. If you still hate it then start looking elsewhere.
I think this way you have given it a good try and will have less regrets later on thinking what if.
I moved into a different role at work but only lasted about 3 months. It was horrible and I was feeling so stressed every day and hating going to work so I can understand how you feel. Being upset and stressed at work was making me very short tempered at home too. But end of the day I feel like I gave it a shot and much happier in my decision to go back to my previous role.
25-02-2016 06:45 #10
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