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  1. #91
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    Oh my glob!

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  3. #92
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    So you would automatically have total trust and faith in first time anonymous posters, a daycare centre where your kid was allegedly sexually abused, and a DH that kept important information about your kids from you. Rightio.
    I am always sceptical of first time posters who post controversial threads.

    But I'm not just talking about you and I'm not just talking about this thread.

    Germs. Perverts. They're everywhere. Better stay home but don't forget to leave your skanky shoes at the door

  4. #93
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRedV View Post
    .
    Germs. Perverts. They're everywhere. Better stay home but don't forget to leave your skanky shoes at the door
    Care to focus on the OP BigRedV instead of detracting with a tailored dig against someone you hold a long standing grudge with?

    Enough of the derailing this is getting a little silly.

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  6. #94
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    Just to clarify people - no hard feelings hey and let's get this thread back on track with the OP.

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    AngelicHobgoblin  (21-02-2016)

  8. #95
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    Default TRIGGER WARNINGMy child was molested by another child at daycare...what shoul...

    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Care to focus on the OP BigRedV instead of detracting with a tailored dig against someone you hold a long standing grudge with?

    Enough of the derailing this is getting a little silly.
    Umm. Just because I disagree with you at times, doesn't mean I have a grudge??? Sorry if you do.

    It was a joke to lighten the thread up a bit.

    Carry on.

  9. #96
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    Did you come/coming home OP?

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  11. #97
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Yes and incidents occurring *can* be a sign that a centre is sub-standard.

    If a child can have the time to do the specifics (multiple actions) of what is alleged in this situation then that's a sign (IMO) that the kids were out of sight for too long.
    I agree, there is usually a lead up to an incident and the carers should have seen it. If not they were not doing their job. The amount of incidents a centre has is an indication of the standard of the centre. My ds's daycare went through a period where there were a run of many incidents occurring, a change of director but much the same staff and now there are very few incidents. Sorry back to topic...

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  13. #98
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    Hi op, i know exactly how you're feeling. its terrifying and makes you feel sick to the stomach. you have a million questions and are feeling like your child and your family have been violated.

    i had similar last year. Another child pulled down my child's pants and touched their genitals. In our casea staff member saw it, and stopped it.both children were sat down seperately and asked what happened, then had it explained to them it was not appropriate to do this/have it done to you.

    have you been given info for CASA? They specialise in dealing with child sexual assault.i hope its ok to put the link here. http://www.casa.org.au/contact-us/

    i met with the staff and they informed me they had to report it to child protection and the education department . i had calls from both to ask questions and see how we were.

    i cried all weekend (happened fri arvo) i couldn't look at my child without crying thinking that someone had violated them. i feared they would think that's normal/ok and do it to others, i freaked out about anything genital related. i wondered what had happened to the other child to make them do this to mine. i wanted to approach the parents....so many feelings and thoughts.

    I'm sorry you and your child have had to go through this its not fair.

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  15. #99
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    To the mum and dad in this situation, can I suggest that you document EVERYTHING. Write down

    - exactly what your daughter said
    - how you responded to her disclosure
    - exactly what you said to the director and her exact response
    - what was said in the meeting as close as possible
    - and any other info


    It will be very hard but try to keep your emotion out of it, it needs to be objective. I only suggest this in case there are legal ramifications later down the track. Often when we are emotional it is easy to forget all the little details.

    Good luck

  16. #100
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    Quote Originally Posted by harvs View Post
    But they shouldn't be telling anyone else if they have informed the parents? It's a total breach of confidentiality.

    I'm not sure what you mean.

    The usual procedure is to inform the Police then once the Police have been informed, a letter is sent out to parents to inform them that an incident has occurred and that the matter is at hand.

    This is mainly done to contain hysteria and prevent it before it happens.

    Kids talk. Little Miss 3 could come home and say "Mummy, Katie told me that Dylan licked her on the woo woo..." and the parent would be like, what? And ring her friend, another parent at the centre and it would get out and get nasty. I've seen that happen.

    By dealing with it formally and as per the legislated procedure, parents are rightly informed that a safety breach has occurred, the circumstances surrounding this (although not in depth) and that the matter is being dealt with.

    Only the other day I received notification by way of letter from the centre my child attends regarding an incident where Police had to be called. I didn't fret. I simply noted it and followed it up. Easy.

    Hiding it behind closed doors doesn't do anyone any favours.

    You can still maintain a level of confidentiality and still keep people informed.


 

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