Eta. Mind you, I was really shocked when I found out mum had stopped believing. I still remember her highlighting passages from her bible all through my childhood. Her parents were strict Roman Catholic. I was probably late teen/early 20s and it sort of confirmed it for me.
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05-02-2016 06:33 #51
Last edited by CakeyMumma; 05-02-2016 at 06:37.
05-02-2016 06:39 #52
I would be so incredibly sad if my DD didn't develop a relationship with God. My life is so much richer and just generally happier when I have God in it. I recently re-established a relationship with God and I am so much happier for it. I've dabbled in religions my whole life but God and Jesus have always been my constant.
I don't believe in the church and what it stands for but if my DD wanted to go to church, I'd happily take her.
Last edited by FirstTimeMummy2012; 05-02-2016 at 06:41.
05-02-2016 06:59 #53
As for the church, I abhor the catholic church and find it incredibly hypocritical, bigoted, archaic and in many ways sinister, especially in how it helps its own in the cover up of child abuse.
I got married in a catholic church, mostly for the sake of my grandmother. I regret it. DH says that there is no way he would agree to that now if we weren't yet married,, which is a moot point given I wouldn't do it now either.
I don't find the values at my catholic primary school any more virtuous than the ones my son's state school has. In fact I'd say it was worse given the principal's husband who was involved in the school was found to be abusing a couple of the students.
I find religion on the whole to be hypocritical and lacking in reason hence my hope that neither of my kids become involved. But as I've said, I'd never disown them for it or love them any less.
05-02-2016 07:05 #54
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05-02-2016 07:14 #55
Myself and my partner are atheists and that's how our kids will be raised. We'll still celebrate christian traditions but they will just be traditions as part of our culture.
Yeah, I'd be (probably very!) disappointed if they became religious but I'd just have to accept that as their decision knowing I did the best in educating and raising them with the truth and reality as we understand it.
05-02-2016 07:16 #56
I'm agnostic my husband is an atheist. My eldest son was catholic school educated. To be honest solely because it was state school (our local school was horrific!) or Catholic. So that's where he went. We've talked about many religions and spirituality generally. He knows mine and his step dad's views, his father is an atheist. DS1 is an atheist. I'm happy with his views and very proud that he is able to debate the topic of religion in a respectful manner with others who have different beliefs (including me!).
As for DS2 who is just 3 it is not a topic that has come up yet. DH and I will discuss our beliefs with him as and when appropriate. That said he will be Steiner educated so we will see how that goes with DH and his brother.
Either way I only want my children to grow as individuals and to question and seek answers. I want them to be respectful and open minded. As long as they avoid religious fanaticism I'll be fine with whatever path they choose.
05-02-2016 07:30 #57
As a child, and still now I suppose, I was always seeking the facts and they just aren't there with many religious aspects; how could something that so many people whole heartedly believe in not be proven yet? There are also the countless things that simply don't make sense, especially when you compare them to science. Add in the hypocrisy and sinister acts by those that are supposed to be loving and supportive, it has never sat well with me.
I like religion in the sense that it gives people hope and how it provides sound coping mechanisms in times of hurt, but I don't feel it's necessary in my chance to get through life's events.
05-02-2016 07:57 #58
I just refuse to believe that there is a higher being that allows innocent babies to die, good people to die of cancer, while the dregs live to a ripe age and have a great life. And I don't buy the whole 'it was God' when something good happens but when a drunk driver kills a pg woman 'well that's man's evils'. If he is so omnipotent why did he let it happen? Yes I know, free will blah blah. But that's ever so convenient. If my child was going to walk onto the road to be hit by a car I would stop him crossing, not just shrug and say oh well he has free will and let it happen?Ahhh probably a bit deep for a morning discussion lol Let me be clear, this isn't a questioning/criticising of people's faith. I'm directly explaining why I became atheist after a religious upbringing and schooling.
05-02-2016 08:20 #59
Such an emotive topic and one that many feel strongly about - including me. I'm mostly with you @Moxy - I've studied many religions, as well as reading Richard Dawkins, Christopher Hitchens, The Bible Fraud etc as well as a lot on spirituality, metaphysics, philosophy, and then heaps on personal development and brain potential such as Bruce Lipton and Joe Dispenza as well as more radical thoughts that are WAY out there about the nature of reality that I won't go into here. From a very intense interest in this topic and twenty-five years of delving and research I identify myself as Agnostic.
I've had too many unexplainable experiences to doubt that there are influences in our life that are beyond our current knowledge and understanding, but just because we don't have a frame of reference for those experiences now, doesn't mean we won't in the future. And I don't believe faith or religion fills the gap either.
My personal view is strongly against any type of religion as such, as I see most doctrines being about control and manipulation of people, not to mention irrational, rather than about love, compassion, kindness, tolerance and freedom. I know that many people find those positive aspects within their religion, and that is fantastic (although I believe we have these qualities as inherent within us and don't need religion to find them), but when religion is used to justify any type of negative behaviour, I abhor it.
In my experience (and this is just MY experience, not a judgement of anyone else's personal faith and the way they approach their religion -it is just that - personal), I find that religion is often used as a crutch for people who can't be bothered to think for themselves. Big generalisation, but I'm talking about people I have known in my life who've used religion to justify really poor behaviour.
If I had kids I hope I would have a broad enough knowledge base to answer their questions and get them thinking and researching for themselves so that they can find their own personal views on the topics. I'd probably be disappointed if they chose to follow a religion, but ultimately it is each person's individual choice and something that I would accept if that was their choice. Not to say that I wouldn't have some enthusiastic debates on the topic, but not from a place of judgement or shame, but one that challenges and questions.
05-02-2016 08:23 #60
My parents weren't terribly strong believers but they do believe there is a God. I can't remember a time where I ever did. I do think that it's entirely possible there was a Jesus, but I don't believe in most of what was said about him. I just see him as a celebrity that had a book written about him and messages got skewed from what happened to what we hear today. I think he probably was a great guy, but just that. A guy. Not son of God or miracle maker etc. I also don't believe in ghosts, clairvoyance, etc. I do believe in the human power of getting others to believe what you want them to.
I suppose God and all that accompanies him, just doesn't make a lot of sense to me. And to be honest, what I was taught at my Catholic school, (and I don't know if everyone is taught the same) but he comes across very narcissistic and mean. I struggle with that also.
Fwiw, I would generally not critique him so openly, as I do like to respect others belief in him, but I couldn't really answer the question of why I don't believe in him, truthfully, without saying it. I wouldn't just say all this to my son who does believe in God but if he asks, I might sugar coat but I won't lie.
I went to a funeral of a reasonably prominent man. It was a catholic funeral, and I felt horrid leaving it. If it was good for his family then that's okay but I would struggle of it were my own loved one. The implication that it's good that he's dead now because he can go serve God, didn't resonate well with me. And the word slave was used way too many times for my comfort. It was all the same language used at my Catholic school. Which is what really confirmed my disbelief I suppose, even though I started there as a non-believer anyway.
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