I don't think it's really fair to say "you have 3 kids... stop wanting another one". There's no real quantifying of that baby craziness. That aside, if you're managing your children well and you can afford another, what is it exactly your hubby is worried about? If you can isolate his real issues, talk them over, then try to solve the problems together maybe that could help?
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19-01-2016 18:40 #11
19-01-2016 18:51 #12
OP, I wouldn't want anyone to go through what I went through. If he says he doesn't want more, he means it. Take him seriously and respect him, at least while you are discussing it further.
Having said that, he needs to take responsibility for contraception.
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19-01-2016 19:08 #13
19-01-2016 19:23 #14
19-01-2016 20:33 #15
19-01-2016 20:47 #16
If it makes you feel better, DH was 44 when DS2 was born and is a wonderful, involved father. In the scheme of things 40 isn't that old, although if he did agree to a 4th I'd be getting a wriggle on
19-01-2016 20:57 #17
I'm glad you guys are as confused as I am lol
19-01-2016 23:01 #18
I think this is just such a hard situation for you both to be in. I don't know about you guys but my hubby and I care how each other feels so having such opposing desires for our futures would be so hard to work through. I think like you have said, a serious talk is needed for you and hubby. have you considered enlisting the help of a couple counsellor if you have trouble making this convo work on your own? It might be worth looking in to if your desires are both so strong and you both want to work through the problem together rather than letting it sit and fester into something bigger...
19-01-2016 23:20 #19
I actually started a post about this exact thing a few months ago and got some really good advice. I will try and find it and bump it for you to read. Unfortunately it hasn't been a great outcome for me, hubby is booked in for the snip in March. We went to counseling and have spoken about it in great lengths but nothing has change his mind. He is done having kids but for me, my family still doesn't feel complete. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely cherish my 2 children but there is just that little part of me that isn't done having kids. It's such a ****ty situation to be in as you can't both get what you want, someone has to 'lose' so to speak. I'm still upset by it and have little cries about it but unfortunately for me there isn't anything I can do to change his mind. It hurts and it will probably take time to 'get' over but I'm sure in time it will be easier to deal with. Huge hugs from someone who knows exactly how you feel!
19-01-2016 23:28 #20
We have two and I want more ( he did to but just stressing with finances at the moment with me on maternity leave). I've told him if he really doesn't want more then to get the snip simple as that
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