I'm outraged on your behalf that anyone else outside of your marriage thinks their opinion on how many kids you should have is even worth paying attention to. also, your dh should tell his family to go fly their kites elsewhere. Jesus h Christ, since when did how many bubs you pop out have any bearing on anyone outside of the two of you?
we're only onto our first (due next month) but I agree with the other posters, it's entirely up to the two of you how many you have. it needs to suit your budget, your lifestyle and ultimately what you think you can personally cope with.
we're personally leaning towards two. maybe consider a third once we have 2 and see how we feel. I am not so sure I could cope with 4 but hats off to all that can and do. it's a personal choice. tell BIL to shut his gob.
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Results 11 to 14 of 14
11-01-2016 08:04 #11
11-01-2016 10:21 #12
2 to 3 kids :)
I'll say at the outset that I have 4 kids so feel I'm able to contribute to the question of outlanders making comments on the number of kids people have.
I actually think it can be a valid comment. Our natural resources are running out and it's a known fact larger families use more of them. So I do actually understand the view that having lots of kids is selfish. I am NOT agreeing with it just saying I understand where it might come from.
Also let's face it families say all sorts of things to each other about various topics not expecting them to the hashed out on a forum.
Last edited by Sonja; 11-01-2016 at 10:26.
11-01-2016 13:03 #13
I have two boys, and don't feel 'done'. I have always wanted 4 and hubby has always wanted 2, so 3 was the compromise. However if we were to have a third boy i'd probably be able to convince hubby of a fourth.
If you think you can handle it, and you have the support of your husband I don't think anyone else's opinion should matter.
11-01-2016 15:23 #14
I can't give any advice unfortunately as I'm in the same position with regards to DH not wanting more.
We agreed before we were married that we wanted 2 kids, and then we had twins! They are now 5 months old and I definitely don't feel done, I'd love to have at least one more, I loved the whole experience.
However, my husband is adamant that we are done because he wants to be able to give our boys a private education, overseas holidays etc.... I respect his viewpoint especially because we agreed to it beforehand (though in hind sight, can you ever know how many you'll want before you actually have one?) but I desperately hope he changes his mind in a couple of years! He has said if we win lotto we can have more, haha.
That's my very long way OP of saying that I think you have to respect your husband's wishes, but that of course you can open up that conversation and try and get him to see your perspective/come around.
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