Moved to a country town in Qld. The heat is unbearable and there is no air con in the new rental. Just ceiling fans.
Kids aren't settling into daycare as well as I'd hoped. The centre is lovely but the kids aren't taking to it. ("Maaaaa! *sob* I REALLY don't want to go to KINDY!!!! PLEASE! I'll just die there!!!" *sob* <- 3 year old's remonstrations four days a week).
Husband hates new house. After dilly-dallying around the rental market, I finally put my foot down and applied for a Queenslander because the temporary accommodation was wearing thin. I got the house. It stands high, is spacious and the floors are wooden. But the agency managing the property is beyond awful (the girl managing the property is young, inexperienced and argumentative). And husband hates the house.
The blues started on Christmas Day.
I woke up feeling this wave of sadness hit me, this feeling of wanting to cry and hopeless at the same time but I held it off and continued to hold it at bay all day. The kids weren't really interested in Christmas...they're still very young....the heat was stifling and I was very aware that we were on our own. I thought of all the people out there surrounded by family and friends. Never a good idea to compare when you're feeling down.
This is the third big move we have undertaken in as many years. We moved to SA to be near the kids' grandparents...that was a waste of time...and employment was always variable, opportunities were thin on the ground and eventually we thought, well we'll move to Qld.
So it's back to a small fridge until we can afford to get a big one. Laundromat every Tuesday until we get a washing machine (I actually don't mind the laundromat. It's quite therapeutic actually). Starting from scratch. Again.
I know nobody and have no real outlet at present. And I often wonder why I wasted so much of my life and how I really haven't amounted to much. My husband is always angry - even when he's not saying anything you can feel his energy - the kids are unsettled and do you think I can find a portable air-conditioner so as to be able to get some relief at night? Lol.
It sounds self indulgent, I know. And things could be worse. But they're still my feelings and I don't know how to make things better.
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27-12-2015 05:49 #1
I got the blues so bad I might even start my own festival
27-12-2015 06:27 #2
I am so sorry you are feeling this way. It is not self indulgent at all. You have picked up your family and made huge moves 3 times now. I can't imagine what it feels like to start again completely. Are there other rentals, can you break lease?
27-12-2015 06:30 #3
Thanks Cakey. Your comments are a kindness.
I could break lease but when I think of all the hassle that would entail - especially after having just moved in - does my head in.
Then there'd be the prospect of finding another house and going through all that application nonsense...if anything, this experience has really hit home that it's time for me to really bite the bullet and aim at saving up for a deposit to buy our own home by the end of my twelve month lease.
27-12-2015 06:43 #4
My situation is different- we weren't financially ready for the impact of having our first Bub. We had to sell our house at a loss because we couldn't make the mortgage payments. Well we finally sold after a year on the market and there was like... 2 rentals available in our areas, neither of them very nice. We took one and lived there for a year and a half with nothing but trouble from the property manager before we moved again to the other side of town. Thankfully we love our house now, and we only moved 25 mins away so I haven't had that displaced, alone feeling but I have done the moving houses several times within a few years. It's hard and it sucks. I'm sorry x
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27-12-2015 06:44 #5
Just wanted to send you some hugs @Mrs Tickle xx
Moving to new place is always stressful, scary and overwhelming. Especially when you don't know anyone there. We did it about 4 years ago and I found joining some local meetup groups was a great way to get know people and make friends. Are there any local clubs or groups you'd be interested in joining? Getting out and meeting people did wonders for helping me settle in and lifting my mood.
I hope things start looking up soon hun xx
27-12-2015 06:48 #6
Thanks guys. I'm looking into ways I can become a part of the town I'm in. The gravity of not having air con in very muggy heat is pretty overwhelming!!! But, yeah, overall, Christmas Day was just bleh. I wanted to be happy but just couldn't. Just felt like a real stuff up.
27-12-2015 06:49 #7
Why are you there? You sound like me when I moved to Tasmania. Beyond depressing.
Can you get out of there? You sound like you would do better in a larger city, is that possible?
Can you sit down with hubby and discuss how your feeling. He doesn't sound happy either maybe you guys can make a plan together to improve things.
27-12-2015 07:07 #8
The nearest city is Brisbane and the thought of trying to navigate Brisbane is a withering one. It's like Sydney now: a mass of roads, tunnels and massive traffic. At least in a small town we have a certain freedom that we would never get in a city.
Husband and I are presently communicating and working out what to do. Bottom line is that I can't afford to move now. So I will just have to lie in the bed I've made for myself and wrestle with those feelings of failure and inadequacy.
27-12-2015 07:12 #9
I'm sorry to hear you're feeling down
I think if you can handle the issues one at a time you'll start to feel more settled and positive.
I would try to get the cooling sorted ASAP - I've lived in a rental without air con before and I couldn't stand it. We ended up getting a window box unit which you can take with you when you leave. Being able to be cool and comfortable will make a positive difference to everyone's mood.
Your kids will settle in to day care, it might just take a bit of time for them to deal with the change of scenery.
Your DH will more than likely calm down a bit once some of these issues are resolved. He's probably overwhelmed like you are. Moving interstate is a massive deal!
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27-12-2015 07:17 #10
It takes time to settle in a new area and it can feel very lonely at first.
Hope you feel better soon.
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