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  1. #1
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    Default 3yo - no success with toilet training

    I don't know what to do. My DS turned 3 last month and we have tried to toilet train him a few times. We're trying again today. Other times we've tried for two days each time with nothing ever going into a toilet or potty.

    We took him shopping and let him choose his undies. We take him to the toilet every hour. He's only wearing undies during the day. We've offered rewards. He has the potty as another if he prefers.

    He sits on the toilet, does nothing, says he's finished, then a few minutes later he wees in his pants. Not only that, he doesn't care. Doesn't even tell us. We have to discover it ourselves.

    I don't know what to do. He's three. I realise these are all signs he's not ready, but at 3, he has to be, doesn't he? I'm worried he's going to be in nappies when he graduates high school at this rate. How can he not care when he pees his pants???

  2. #2
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    He's just not ready by the sounds of it.

    Perhaps try again in a month or so?

    I was always so concerned about my DS being a late toilet trainer, but one day it just clicked. And it will for your DS too

  3. #3
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    Yep, agreed. He sounds just not ready. I also find it easiest when we're at home, to just let them run around with no nappy/no undies. I think the needing to take down undies thing/the feeling of wearing them is a confusing when they first transition from just using nappies. I just leave a potty or two in obvious rooms (kitchen, lounge) so they can jump on if they need. Then gradually progress to taking the potty out to the bathroom, then finally the toilet.

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    Leave it. He's not ready or interested and that's fine. My son wasn't ready at 3 either. He was having accidents all through his clothes...I was yelling a lot so I stopped. Start talking to him baout the toilet and how big boys use undies and not nappies. I got fed up with nappies and started again after 3 months. It took 2 weeks of consistency and A LOT of patience cause he had more accidents but with constant reinforcement it worked.

    One night after a month of being day trained we forgot his night nappy cause he had fallen asleep and he was dry. From then on he stayed dry with a few accidents here and there. He then grew to hate the nappy so much that if he acts up we tell him we will put his napoy back on and he hates it lol.

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    He's only JUST three. It's not a magic number where all children are ready to be potty trained. I don't think he sounds ready or interested and think you should wait a month or two before trying again, and then be consistent and expect it to take longer than a couple of days. Every kid I have ever nannied for has mastered it at different ages. Twin girls I had before having DS mastered wees around the same time but then one would only poo in a nappy or her underwear for months before she finally just decided she was fine with doing it in the toilet. They're all going to do it at their own pace. ☺️.

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    So... i don't really have any experience with this but here's a little tip from my daughter's OT. She said nappies are so good these days that kids generally don't mind/feel the wetness and therefore don't really learn the sensation of weeing. So she suggests putting a pair of undies on then nappies. ..so you don't have a mess etc but they learn the wet feeling a lot better.
    Maybe worth a try.

    It sounds like he's just not ready though. My daughter is 3 and not ready but she does have other medical things going on she sits on the toilet and does the same thing. ..says she's finished and then will promptly wee after.

    Maybe wait a while. I don't think there's a magic age for it.

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    Exact same thing happened with me. My son turned three and had absolutely no idea and I had terrible thoughts of him being in a nappy for kindergarten... Like yours he appeared to have no idea and I even resorted to bribing with jelly beans and it was still a hit or miss...

    When he turned 3 years and 4 months... It was like a light switched on... I think he had 2 accidents ever after that... He was night trained less than 2 weeks later. I Couldn't believe it and I had done nothing different... If anything I had given up.

    Hang in there. If you had told me a week before he was trained that he would have it in a week... I would have laughed at you 😆

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    Thanks ladies. So the famous 'click' could still be coming. He's moving up to the preschool room in January and he's going to be one of the only ones there who isn't toilet trained. I suppose if it doesn't worry him then there's no worry?

    He actually did a wee in the toilet for his Nonna today, which makes me think he just doesn't want to do it for DH and me.

  10. #9
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    If it makes you feel any better, DD is 3y9m and has only been trained for wees in the last 3-4 weeks. I've been trying on and off for over a year! Now o work on no2's. I'm not enjoying washing poo our of her undies 😷😱

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    Default 3yo - no success with toilet training

    DD wasn't ready until about 3.5yo. She still had quite a lot of accidents though and she didn't start doing poo in the toilet until much later. She's almost 4.5yo now and i can finally say she's toilet trained (day only though). It stressed me out so much but I just had to accept that she was going to do it in her own time.

    I'm dreading TT again when DS is old enough!!


 

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