+ Reply to Thread
Page 3 of 7 FirstFirst 12345 ... LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 61
  1. #21
    Join Date
    Jul 2015
    Posts
    7,345
    Thanks
    4,978
    Thanked
    4,457
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by lilypily View Post
    Gawd I was from a workplace where all that was incredibly normal.
    yeah me too. was fun for a while but it became tedious and difficult to get ahead professionally when everyone was so geared towards going out, socializing, flirting etc.

  2. #22
    TheGooch's Avatar
    TheGooch is offline Winner 2014 - Newbie of the Year
    Winner 2016 BubHubs DIVA Award
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Posts
    5,304
    Thanks
    9,461
    Thanked
    4,984
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    I would be uncomfortable with this - all of it.
    But I guess the test is what is Ok for you and your DH in your marriage. Only you guys really know what is acceptable in your relationship.
    I wondered what you meant about you winning your DH's trust back? Why did you have to win his trust back? He was the one lying to you.
    I don't buy that your DH needs a coworkers help to buy your birthday present. A co worker he's known for 3 months and doesn't know you. How would they know what to buy his wife who he has been married to over 3 years? It sounds like he's making excuses to call on them, ask them for help.
    If it makes you uncomfortable, especially given the history, he needs to adjust his behaviour. What's more important here for him?
    Im sorry Op and I hope he hears you out.

  3. #23
    FearlessLeader's Avatar
    FearlessLeader is offline Winner 2013 - Most Memorable Thread
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    10,728
    Thanks
    2,499
    Thanked
    9,124
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts

    Default husbands relationship with coworkers.

    Honestly? I don't really see any evidence of flirting in your OP. My work place is very friendly and quite casual (amongst certain people)- I see quite a few of the guys outside of work and have been known to send them drunk text messages if it was pertinent (eg I had found out some good gossip, or a particularly good souvlaki place I knew they would like!)
    Putting your DS on the phone to a colleague sounds sort of sweet. Showing colleagues your picture wouldn't bother me, but I can understand how it might bother you, but I couldn't make a call on that because it would depend on if you thought that your DH would know you wouldn't like it.
    The name calling wouldn't bother me either as it wouldn't raise an eyebrow at my work.
    The only part that would bother me is a colleague I didn't know buying me a present, but that just seems weird, lazy and impersonal not suspicious.
    I don't think any of it adds up to reprehensible behavior, some people are just very friendly with their workmates. From what you have said here, it feels to me like you're overreacting. I wouldn't be terribly pleased if DP effectively told me that he didn't like me being close with my work mates. If you work full time and spend most of your waking hours with colleagues, some choose to form stronger and more personal relationships with those people. I don't see anything wrong with that.

  4. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to FearlessLeader For This Useful Post:

    BlissedOut  (30-11-2015),lilypily  (30-11-2015),LoCo  (30-11-2015)

  5. #24
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    At the beach
    Posts
    10,495
    Thanks
    1,430
    Thanked
    9,006
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 17/10/14100 Posts in a week
    I must be really old fashioned then but how is calling your boss a "soft ****" ever ok?

    Seriously even if there was nothing else that's just not on. You can have fun and make work fun but how that is ok is just odd to me.

  6. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Sonja For This Useful Post:

    binnielici  (15-01-2016),BornToBe  (01-12-2015),LoveLivesHere  (30-11-2015),MissMuppet  (30-11-2015),VicPark  (01-12-2015)

  7. #25
    FearlessLeader's Avatar
    FearlessLeader is offline Winner 2013 - Most Memorable Thread
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    10,728
    Thanks
    2,499
    Thanked
    9,124
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Sonja View Post
    I must be really old fashioned then but how is calling your boss a "soft ****" ever ok?

    Seriously even if there was nothing else that's just not on. You can have fun and make work fun but how that is ok is just odd to me.
    Because lots of workplaces aren't particularly hierarchical? lots of workplaces are very non traditional. One of our managers invited quite a few people from work to her burlesque performance. Everyone in my workplace swears like a sailor. No-one would ever do it in front of outsiders, but the codes of professionalism aren't the same everywhere.

  8. #26
    Join Date
    Jul 2015
    Posts
    7,345
    Thanks
    4,978
    Thanked
    4,457
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    I can't imagine ever calling anyone at work, superior or otherwise, a softc0ck. it's just unprofessional and unnecessary.

  9. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to turquoisecoast For This Useful Post:

    LoveLivesHere  (30-11-2015),MissMuppet  (30-11-2015)

  10. #27
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    At the beach
    Posts
    10,495
    Thanks
    1,430
    Thanked
    9,006
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 17/10/14100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    Because lots of workplaces aren't particularly hierarchical? lots of workplaces are very non traditional. One of our managers invited quite a few people from work to her burlesque performance. Everyone in my workplace swears like a sailor. No-one would ever do it in front of outsiders, but the codes of professionalism aren't the same everywhere.
    And if someone working there didn't like it? What would happen?

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to Sonja For This Useful Post:

    VicPark  (01-12-2015)

  12. #28
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    in a wormhole
    Posts
    2,784
    Thanks
    4,634
    Thanked
    2,818
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I wouldn't be comfortable with any of that either. I don't think it indicates cheating necessarily, but it's unprofessional and there's boundaries being crossed, and it's the kind of thing that can lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings all too easily. And really - getting a coworker to choose and buy your present? That's not on.

  13. #29
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    At the beach
    Posts
    10,495
    Thanks
    1,430
    Thanked
    9,006
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 17/10/14100 Posts in a week

    Default husbands relationship with coworkers.

    Working in law firms is incredibly friendly and people can behave like you have described @FearlessLeader. The hours people work are insane and it brings with it a sense of us against the world and the working relationship is incredibly intense. It changed though after I had kids and my life became about getting the work done and getting home.

    Also in my last law firm the partner was a female and it just wasn't her style. The group was still fun and supportive and I guess looking back I see how uncomfortable a lot of our behaviour might have made others feel.

    If the OP's husbands workplace is like this and she's not happy then maybe it's a conversation they have to have.

    Something clearly happened 3 years ago in a different workplace which can not helped the way the op feels.
    Last edited by Sonja; 30-11-2015 at 21:31.

  14. The Following User Says Thank You to Sonja For This Useful Post:

    babyno1onboard  (30-11-2015)

  15. #30
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    At the beach
    Posts
    10,495
    Thanks
    1,430
    Thanked
    9,006
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 17/10/14100 Posts in a week

    Default husbands relationship with coworkers.

    (My opinion was clearly so wonderfully expressed it was posted twice 😎)


 

Similar Threads

  1. House husbands
    By 2BlueBirds in forum General Chat
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 22-09-2015, 12:11
  2. TLC's My husbands not gay
    By melimum in forum Movies / Music / Books / TV Chat
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 26-08-2015, 19:07
  3. My husbands BAD behaviour.
    By Mummy Potato in forum Family & Friends
    Replies: 28
    Last Post: 11-12-2014, 12:50

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
FEATURED SUPPORTER
Shapland Swim SchoolsSemi private learn to swim classes for a maximum of 3 children in specialized heated teaching pools. Our swim schools ...
REVIEWS
"Made bed time less anxious"
by Meld85
My Little Heart Whisbear - the Humming Bear reviews ›
"Wonderful natural Aussie made product!"
by Mrstwr
Baby U Goat Milk Moisturiser reviews ›
"Replaced good quality with cheap tight nappies"
by Kris
Coles Comfy Bots Nappies reviews ›