I wish I could say 'yes, I am happy'. I hope that one day soon I can. Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for what I have, family and friends, a gorgeous 8 month old nephew, a roof over my head and an income. I do however suffer from severe anxiety. To the point where I think it has turned into depression. I dislike my job and I dislike the situation I am currently in. I get anxious just leaving my house these days, especially when I go to work. I am in a very complicated relationship with someone I deeply love, but we can never be together. What I really want from life is my own family, I want a husband and I want children. I'm 36 years old and I can't seem to get out of the rut I'm in, but somethings got to give soon. I'm definitely not where I thought I would be at this point in my life and I'm not happy.
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08-11-2015 20:34 #31Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2014
Are you really happy?
08-11-2015 20:45 #32
Yes I am happy... Much more happy than I was 5 years ago when I was married. Life is good... My beautiful boys complete me. My only down times are when they are with their dad ... But then knowing how much they love him and enjoy their time with him also makes me happy. I'm much worse off financially but richer in every other way. Happy dot com 😄
08-11-2015 21:19 #33
Mostly I am happy. I am so lucky to have everything that I do and I am very grateful.
I still really struggle to like myself though. I really hate my personality at times and my inability to change those things about myself that I don't like. So while I am happy with my life, I'm still not happy with myself. I'm not sure I ever will be. Have tried really hard for a long time to be content with who I am, but it just doesn't happen.
08-11-2015 23:17 #34
Yes I am. I wish my health was better and more reliable but despite that, I am happy. My life is rich in every other way. DH is my everything, I'd live in a tent with the man if it was all we had. Our kids are beautiful, incredible creatures. I love where we live and the community we are part of. Sometimes I reflect on the people in my life and I realise how rich I am.
When I was young I had no idea what I expected life to be like at nearly 40. I'm kind of glad I never had clear expectations of what might or might not happen. I've just rolled with the tides, of course there's been ups and downs but I can say that yes, I am genuinely happy.
09-11-2015 00:45 #35
No I am not very happy. I don't really know why. Well, there are lots of little things, but nothing major, and I really have no excuse for feeling the way I do. I have a beautiful and healthy son as a result of a very trying IVF journey, a loving hubby who is able to financially support our little family so that I don't have to work. Aside from raising my child and doing housewifely things, I really have bugger all other responsibilities. So I should be happy as Larry.
But I'm not.
And yes, this is how I hoped my life would be. Married and a SAHM is all I ever wanted to be. There were many occasions back when I was single where I was convinced I'd never be lucky enough to have this life.
So why aren't I happy??
I don't have any friends or adult company (other than DH) of any kind in my daily life, I suppose that doesn't help. I'm probably also a bit depressed, that's been something that has come and gone my whole adult life so far. I'm really hoping that in the next couple of years something "clicks" and I'm able to appreciate and make the most of what I have...
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