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  1. #111
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    I hover over my kids at playgrounds. Not because they can't climb well enough - but rather because they are runners.

  2. #112
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    I hovered when they were younger ... Now it's more like I'm on playground duty - where I watch... But from a distance.

  3. #113
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    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    I've been thinking about this today and I think part of the reason I don't hover is that if one of my kids gets stuck I WANT them to have to figure it out, and if they slip or fall or can't get out of a bind themselves I WANT them (and please don't take this to be sadistic) to feel real fear. I want them to actually understand that what they are climbing on is really high and serious and they have to treat it with respect. Children should feel fear. They should feel it and overcome it, because that's how they become resilient and confident in life when they come across fearful situations. And leaving them clinging on equipment in the park for a minute or two with no mum around to save them is a safe and excellent way to teach them that. I don't let them get seriously distressed, or deliberately leave them there crying while I count to 10. But they learn that something really scary can happen and it will be ok. They might even really hurt themselves, but that will also be ok. I heard a quote years ago that has always resonated with me, and it was something like 'we are all scared of our kids breaking a bone, and yes that's a danger. But the BIGGER danger is raising kids with no coping mechanisms, and no resilience'
    At what age do you think they should feel fear and work it out for themselves?

  4. #114
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    Quote Originally Posted by DesperatelySeekingSleep View Post
    Turns out the girl was 5. We were about to leave and I was contemplating knocking on the mums car door when she got out quickly, thanked me for watching over her girl then took off to go supervise her.

    Dp asked if I had posted anything on Facebook about it because the way she thanked me seemed totally random...
    I've been that mum a few times, I only work in my office 2 days a week but have to take and make phone calls and emails to clients at various times of the day every day so sometimes if I'm out with DS and I have to take or make a call I'll often pull over at a park and let him get out and play while I'm on the phone, if no ones around I'll get out and stand at the park and talk but if there are people around yes I sit in the car and talk , yes it might take away half an hour of my time with him for the day but I'd prefer that than having to put him in day care for the whole day

  5. #115
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elijahs Mum View Post
    I've been that mum a few times, I only work in my office 2 days a week but have to take and make phone calls and emails to clients at various times of the day every day so sometimes if I'm out with DS and I have to take or make a call I'll often pull over at a park and let him get out and play while I'm on the phone, if no ones around I'll get out and stand at the park and talk but if there are people around yes I sit in the car and talk , yes it might take away half an hour of my time with him for the day but I'd prefer that than having to put him in day care for the whole day
    I can understand that. In this case there have been several attempted abductions reported in the local paper for that same park.

  6. #116
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    Quote Originally Posted by A-Squared View Post
    At what age do you think they should feel fear and work it out for themselves?
    As soon as they can climb. So 12-15mths for my kids. We teach them to climb safely and to get back down. Then let them learn with us watching closely. Then by 2yo you can just let them play

  7. #117
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    Reading through posts it seems it's assess each child and risk.
    As my DD is a runner with no fear with her we are better off being there to catch when she falls ( as she has come off the edge of things before ), and as previously mentioned she's very independent and has opportunity to develop confidence and independence else where ( and on other equipment)

  8. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to maternidade For This Useful Post:

    A-Squared  (12-09-2015),AdornedWithCats  (12-09-2015),TheGooch  (12-09-2015)

  9. #118
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    Quote Originally Posted by A-Squared View Post
    At what age do you think they should feel fear and work it out for themselves?
    For me, depending on the situation from when they can walk, I never baby proofed anything and we have steps and stairs throughout the house, people were always amazed that at 1 DS could crawl/walk over and down the stairs and never attempted to open/close things he shouldn't or touch power switches etc, yes he stumbled and fell a few times but he learnt by himself how to navigate his way around

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  11. #119
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    Quote Originally Posted by MaximumStarlight View Post
    What's with getting up Maxwell's Silver Hammer for how she handles her kid's daycare? She didn't ask for opinions or advice on that but lots are throwing their two cents in. She's cool with it, the carers are apparently cool with it, so why bother commenting on it when it's not asked for or related to the OP?
    I suspect (reading the posts that the posters who made the comments ) didn't realise it wasn't me who posted this; and they were attempting to create a sense that I had some anxiety issue and trouble letting go and that my daughter will have issues over my over protectiveness.
    Maxwell's Silver situation is completely different and understandable.
    This is what happens when people don't read properly and attempt to cyber bully ( or what ever you want to call picking on someone else's life)
    And before the keyboard warriors say I'm doing this I'm not, I just didn't know the social norm and have been provided reasonable facts and information as to why they do what they do ( still not comfortable with my own child as previously mentioned reasons). But I'm just going to let them do their thing at the park and I'll do mine

  12. #120
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    Quote Originally Posted by maternidade View Post
    I suspect (reading the posts that the posters who made the comments ) didn't realise it wasn't me who posted this; and they were attempting to create a sense that I had some anxiety issue and trouble letting go and that my daughter will have issues over my over protectiveness.
    Maxwell's Silver situation is completely different and understandable.
    This is what happens when people don't read properly and attempt to cyber bully ( or what ever you want to call picking on someone else's life)
    And before the keyboard warriors say I'm doing this I'm not, I just didn't know the social norm and have been provided reasonable facts and information as to why they do what they do ( still not comfortable with my own child as previously mentioned reasons). But I'm just going to let them do their thing at the park and I'll do mine
    I'm inclined to agree the a lot of posters on this thread seem to be implying that those of us who choose to closely supervise our children on play equipment are somehow stunting our kids ability to develop a sense of ability, limitations, confidence etc which I think is hogwash. Maybe I'm reading too much into it but that seems to be the general theme.

  13. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Mambo For This Useful Post:

    AdornedWithCats  (12-09-2015),BlondeinBrisvegas  (12-09-2015),maternidade  (12-09-2015),Sethysmum  (13-09-2015),TheGooch  (12-09-2015)


 

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