I need some words of inspiration guys. This is wearing me down and I'm starting to lean towards the next FET being our last go. DP and I need to have a talk about what he seriously wants because the next step after that is another $20,000 for donor number 3 and he's only going along with it to make me happy. I don't know what I want. As I said earlier, or in the CT IVF forum, not sure... I don't have the driving need to procreate, but I want that happy, fulfilling family life with my DP and I want to see him as the wonderful father he's meant to be. I said to him last night if this next FET fails (embies no. 18 and 19 btw) maybe we should give it up as a bad joke and plan a wedding instead. He's not even worried about getting married FFS ! Said it doesn't make a better couple necessarily and we don't have the money anyway. Arggggghhh man throw me some scraps would you ?? Baby or marriage or neither or both, just make a decision man !! I think this prednisone is making me moody and depressed already. @Chiefsgirl how many times and until how many weeks do you need to continue the intralipids?
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18-08-2015 16:25 #161
IVF over 40 #16
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18-08-2015 17:53 #162
@leyshoja I have lots of different immune issues so you can't compare my protocol to yours. I did one infusion 2 weeks before transfer (it shd have been 7-10 days but I couldn't get in), then I had one on bfp and I'll be doing them every 3 weeks till 14 weeks. But that is based on my blood test results which show my nk/immune issues are flaring.
The standard is one before, one on bfp and then every 4-6 weeks till 12 weeks so only 3-4 infusions.
It is such an emotional time and really difficult to make decisions, I know that. But maybe these infusions might be what gets you over the line to the bfp, so the money spent on them is minuscule in comparison to another full donor cycle.
I had doubts about my own immune diagnosis after I got the bfp with donor eggs. I wondered whether it would have worked anyway without all the drugs, just by having the younger eggs. Then I saw my bt results where the nk cells and other results had gone from low to high and i realized that for me, I need this treatment to help me keep hold of the baby(ies) and I'll do whatever it takes to keep them safe.
As hard as it is, once you make a decision about whether to go full steam with all the drugs and intralipids, or decide not to, it will all be easier, it's the decision making that is so hard.
18-08-2015 18:59 #163
leyshoja It sounds like you are overwhelmed by all the rushing around trying to organise and familiarise yourself with yet another procedure and the costs and stress that come with that. I just know on the egg donation website that the majority of ladies have had to go through a few cycles to get their baby. Its not just you. I was reading about a lady today who got 4 of the donor embryos tested and 3 were abnormal but she got preggers on the one that came back normal. Its surprising how many young embryos aren't great either. Get through the next round and regroup once you get back. Cross that bridge when you get to it.
19-08-2015 08:16 #164
@leyshoja if the next FET doesn't work I'd say keep trying the immune system stuff and try one more donor but maybe that's because I don't want to see you give up!!
I think one clinic in california it was do three donor cycles and get your money back if it doesn't work. If only they were all like that..........
19-08-2015 08:23 #165
Leyshoja, here's my 2¢'s....
Keep your FET as is date wise, use the immune drugs steroids/clex, antibiotics, skip intralipids as it seems too hard and is stressing you out.
Make an appointment now to see Wazza - swap to him as your FS it sounds like your FS is out of his depth a bit now, also make an appointment with Dr M now as it can take weeks to get in to both him and Waz. Hopefully you won't need the appointments and you'll be utd without intralipids, for many the supporting immune drugs are all that's needed.
This is just what I'd do if it were me... keep positive about your upcoming trip, steroids etc are likely to get you over the line x
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19-08-2015 09:26 #166
@leyshoja Luv, you frucking well deserve a BFFP for sheer persistence, determination and tenacity I say!!!
I'm not surprised you've had a gutful and are ready to throw the towel in on the whole thing especially after recent developments r.e immune stuff and the extra stress and anxiety that's caused. I can understand how it all seems just too frucking hard Luv, I really can but I think all the other Girls have given you great advice
You are most likely feeling overwhelmed and pressured in trying to get the intrallipid organised as @Bongley said. But like @Chiefsgirl pointed out, once you've made a decision to use them or not for this Cycle then hopefully some of the pressure will ease for you. And yes, the Prednisone won't be helping either. It can make you feel like a scattered mess at times.
I'm in agreement with @emski72's suggestion of just going with the immune drugs (steroids/clex/baby aspirin, antibiotics etc) and leave out the intrallipids if it's going to be too much hassle or $ to organise for this Cycle. In your case, the immune drugs might just be enough to get you over the line Luv
I will urge you again to make an appointment with both Wazza and Dr M. Mind you QFG have a few CREI accredited Specialists (I did some research): Ben Kroon, A/ Prof Anusch Yazdani, Clare Boothryod (have read mixed reviews about her) that are visiting Specialists at Spring Hill Specialist Day Hospital and work for QFG so it could be easier/quicker to transfer over to one of them for an appoint. I agree with Em that your FS here is out of his depth now. I know how much you respect and value him Luv, but he can't help you with this particular issue and you need to see someone who can IMO.
Luv..please just try to concentrate on your upcoming Cycle ok?? That's all you need and should be focusing on right now. All those other questions and decisions although very important one's are best left until after the outcome of this FET is known (and by Christ I'm and praying like an OCD affected Monk that it'll be a BFFP!!)xoxoxoxo
Last edited by BlondeinBrisvegas; 19-08-2015 at 09:30.
19-08-2015 10:53 #167
Thanks girls ! @Chiefsgirl and @Bongley, yep I am struggling with this decision and feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. As horrible as this sounds, it does make me feel better to know I'm not the only one that has had such sh1tty luck with donors eggs. I have had just about enough but just don't want to throw away all this effort just yet.
If the next FET is a BFN and we decide to go ahead with lucky donor number 3, at least I'll have a lot more time up my sleeve to organise all these bits and pieces. @emski72 and @BlondeinBrisvegas I'm off to see my FS today to find out what the fruck is going on with these extra immunity blood test results he got back but didnt understand. That is stressing me a fair bit too - the not knowing wtf is going on.
The other stress - getting a frickin answer from CT !!! I've asked if I can do intralips on the Tuesday and transfer on Friday and if so, book me in. I know its usually longer beforehand they need to be done, but they said to me 'several days' beforehand so maybe 3 is enough.... No frickin answer arrrrggghhhhhhhh !!! I was hoping to see my FS today at least knowing if I was doing intralipids or not.
Anyway, I'm going to nail him about the antibiotics and clexane - both of which he was reluctant to prescribe. So I'm at least informed when I get there, whats the deal with the clexane and antibiotics again? Dose rates, when to start, when to stop etc ? Anybody ?
Last edited by JulieMalooley; 19-08-2015 at 10:56.
19-08-2015 10:59 #168
@leyshoja I hope you can sort through all the emotions and hassle of figuring out what's next - especially with all the drugs affecting you too
FWIW I think it's great that you are putting strategies in place to address the immune system, even if it is not all "proven" science as yet. I do think it is unwise to keep doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - so your plan to do the prednisone / clexane / aspirin / antibitoics is a good one and if that doesn't work, then I think you know the next steps already.
Just anecdotally, even though I don't know all the details, my SIL took eight years to have her first, and the things that got her over the line was the above protocol, plus the scratch and flush and the intralipids. She did the lot and that combination finally worked for her. She only had mild NK cells on her tests, so there wasn't a clear reason for doing it all - but I think like me, she was over 40 and they were throwing the kitchen sink at her.
Although I know for this cycle you are going to do the two embies, I would also consider the paper that BIB posted that talked about with immune stuff that if one embie was "good" and one wasn't, the bad one would take the good one out with it - so they only transfer one at a time to ensure that if you do get a good one, it continues. Food for thought.
Good luck hon, sheer persistence has to pay off in the end and like BIB, I'll be doing the OCD Monk thing for you as well
Last edited by Summer; 19-08-2015 at 11:02.
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19-08-2015 10:59 #169
Why make an appt with both Wazza AND Dr M ?
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19-08-2015 11:01 #170
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