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  1. #1
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    Default 1 year old - no & redirecting isnt working

    Ive basically spent the entire day so far saying 'no' to my 1 year old. Redirecting isnt working either. Any tips for something that might work?

    He threw food all over me. He keeps hitting & biting. He keeps banging hard toys on the top of our timber coffee table & on the walls. He tried to bite my legs when im preparing his meals. He rolls onto his tummy the second i lie him down for a nappy change. He keeps throwing toys at me. Omg what is going on today?? Hes being feral.

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    Just keep being consistent with your approach. It won't work sometimes/ some days and that's fine, but you need to stay consistent

    Hang in there, we all have days/weeks like this!

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    That all sounds fairly normal to me.

    My ds bites when he is hungry or tired. He bites my legs too when I'm cooking! That drives me crazy but I know its because he needs something.

    For pooey nappies I just have to hold him down while I quickly try and clean with the other hand. He is not very impressed at all!

    For the banging...can you get him a drum? Or let him bang on a saucepan?

    My ds is hard to distract but that's really the best way to go about preventing them doing things they shouldn't.They have no impulse control at this age which is why saying "no" won't help. If they get an idea they "have" to carry it out.

    Eta: could he be bored? It was around this age ds started getting very annoying doing things he shouldn't just to get a response. I found getting out of the house for a bit (ie. To the park) calmed him down once we were back at home.
    Last edited by AdornedWithCats; 16-07-2015 at 13:57.

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    For my DD removing my attention is the most powerful thing. So when she used to spit/throw food I would say calmly but firmly 'no spitting'. Then leave the room for 1 min. I had to repeat it quite a few times but she eventually got the message.
    Now she is older, 2 and 2 months, I use the naughty chair. I also still remove myself at times so for example the other night she was swatting me while in her high chair so I say 'Mummy doesn't like it when you hit. I won't sit next to you if you keep hitting.' She continued so I moved away.
    It works for my DD because she loves being close to people so removal of attention is powerful for her. I guess you need to figure out what works for your DS.

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    Now hes headbutting me in the face....

    We just went out for a walk in the pram, theres no parks that he can play in within walking distance as everyone goes in them with their dogs off leash. We also went in the backyard but getting dh to tidy up things like bits of treated timber etc is like talking to a wall so that outdoor play lasted until ds tried to chew on some treated timber & WOULD NOT be redirected so we came inside.

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    I would not be allowing a head butt in the face. anytime I was hurt I would just move away. or put the child into the cot/ playpen. i know it can be so hard, but you just have to be consistent. often you will have days where you are saying 'no' times a million, and days where distraction might not work, but you have to keep going with it. children learn by repetition. hugs, marie.

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    yep,consistency. it'shard though.
    if possible, remove the object/yourself/your son or give him a situation where he CAN do what he wants. So with the banging...as PP suggested, give him something he can bang on. If that doesn't work, warn him and take away whatever he's using to bang.He'll either get the idea, or be unable to do what you don't want him to.

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    Thank-you i will keep trying

    Btw how on earth do i do a nappy up when he has his feet in his mouth?? I just managed to hold him down for a change on his back but he would not take his feet out of his mouth & i dont have enough hands to hold him down, hold his legs down & do the nappy up. Not to mention putting his pants back on is almost impossible. If it wasnt so cold id just give up on clothes & a nappy completely cause its just completely impossible.

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    Quote Originally Posted by heartstringz View Post
    Thank-you i will keep trying

    Btw how on earth do i do a nappy up when he has his feet in his mouth?? I just managed to hold him down for a change on his back but he would not take his feet out of his mouth & i dont have enough hands to hold him down, hold his legs down & do the nappy up. Not to mention putting his pants back on is almost impossible. If it wasnt so cold id just give up on clothes & a nappy completely cause its just completely impossible.
    A challenge that every mother goes through. You just wrangle and do the best you can, trying to distract the baby for 2 seconds at a time so you could get one side of the nappy done up, then distract with something else to get the other side of the nappy done up, then wrangle with the pants (I found raspberries on the belly as I pulled them up made it a bit easier. Then they move on to the next challenging behaviour

    Your baby is displaying perfectly normal behaviours for his age. They do pass, with time and consistency.
    Last edited by Full House; 16-07-2015 at 14:42.

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    Quote Originally Posted by heartstringz View Post
    Thank-you i will keep trying

    Btw how on earth do i do a nappy up when he has his feet in his mouth?? I just managed to hold him down for a change on his back but he would not take his feet out of his mouth & i dont have enough hands to hold him down, hold his legs down & do the nappy up. Not to mention putting his pants back on is almost impossible. If it wasnt so cold id just give up on clothes & a nappy completely cause its just completely impossible.
    Give him something to play with as u change his nappy. The other day I changed my 13 month old GS nappy and he was wriggling so I gave him a toy ph that I had .. He was so distracted for 30 secs

    When the kids were that age I had a toy that was only for nappy change time and it was new to them each time. They never played with it other times ...


 

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